The Cone Of Shame – Torture Device or Cute Accessory?
The Cone of Shame. Vortex of Sadness. The synonyms are endless, but these are the only two that I can think of. If you don’t know what these are, first let me show you the human equivalent:
Sorry the image is so crappy. The thing was, no one had iPhones or Black Berry’s with Twitter apps in ye olden tymes so no one could really twitpic this public shaming going on right here.
Anyway, the stocks were used in the days of yore when people did bad. Those things were usually stuff like not churning butter for the Arch Bishop of Salzburg because your child was stricken with plague or maybe you knocked over a basket of fruit in yon public market place and a pear hit the heel of a knight recently back from the crusades and you hurt a cursed bunion or something.
Now that our history lesson is over, let us take the train to Nowsville. Let us bask in the glory of not having your first born child stolen so that some warlock could rub rendered baby fat all over himself so that he could fly. Modern times are awesome.
As I was walking to my Pilates class today, I saw some shiny, red, horseless carriage with something marvelous in it. It was a dog (and a couple yelling at each other about something people in red BMW SUV’s yell about). Nothing so great about a dog, right? Well, let me tell you something. This dog was cute. It was also wearing a CONE OF SHAME:
Image Courtesy of The Internet. This is Doug, from the movie UP.
Usually, when for reals dogs wear the cone of shame, it’s because they’ve had surgery or some __insert sad story here__ has happened to them. After I was done with my class, I came back to work and began to look for pups with the cone of shame (because yes, that’s what I get paid to do. All hail the Chief of Google Image Search). And that’s how this blog was born. Please enjoy the following photos:
Note: Clicking on the hyperlink will take you to the original post. Be careful! Some of the sites come from people that love other people!
Is this dog wearing leggings? You know, like Flashdance? I don’t even know. Maybe that’s how the cone of shame was acquired with this pooch. Maybe it was doing some wicked bad dance move and it snapped its fingers, snapped its neck.
“Plz, no photos. My shame is deep. It’s deeper than that bone I buried in the backyard and cannot find.”
This dog was probably skiing in Aspen. I’m imagining that it saw a fire hydrant, turned to quickly, lost it’s sense of direction, and turned into the cutest avalanche ever.
Pug-dar – Pugdar, much like radar, works by sending off and receiving signals of hugs and cute.
Here we see an adverse side effect of the cone of shame. Notice how it is crinkling all the skin folds and concentrating ALL THE CUTE onto the face of this pugs head.
Hurr Derp Hurr Durrrrr. Raspberries for you. This pug takes no guff from anyone.
Here’s a photo of a cat. You know, because I like cats and this cat looks MAD.
Have a good weekend! Don’t get in any trouble or I’ll put you in the Buzznet stocks!