Check Out Captain America’s Butt! AKA: The Legacy of the 1994 Marvel Comics Swimsuit Special
So, there’s some big stuff going on right now. Not only is San Diego Comic Con this weekend, but Captain America opens in theatres this Friday. And as much as I tend to favor DC over Marvel, I am looking forward to the Captain America movie.
Because, see, no matter what, there is something movie adaptations have that the comics tend to be light on: fanservice for those of us who like men.
Most comic fanservice is “girl in skimpy costume/bikini/lingerie/standing naked with convieniently long hair and coffee mug over her crotch.” It’s one of those things I tend to roll my eyes at in the industry because I feel like it keeps a lot of women from reading comics and it tends to even embarass the guys who are regular readers. However, I can be sure that while watching Captain America, I am going to be given plenty of shots of Chris Evans’s naked, muscular chest. And to be fair, it sometimes happens in comics, too, but not enough to balance the scales.
But you see, once upon a time, in a magical land called “The 1990’s,” Marvel comics put out a yearly swimsuit issue. And no, it wasn’t just the super HEROINES in swimsuits.
We got pin-ups of the Men of Marvel. And, okay, it was during the 90’s when the anatomy of comic book characters was not really…um…realistic, but seriously, you need to check out Captain America’s butt:
“OH HI THERE! I WAS JUST READING THE CONSTITUTION AND THINKING ABOUT LIBERTY. WHILE YOU’RE THERE, COULD YOU RUB SOME SUNSCREEN ON MY CHISELED BACK, SHOULDERS AND THIGHS?”
But it doesn’t stop there, oh no.
Iron Man/Tony Stark needs a razor to properly show off, but we’ll let it slide this one.
Super-powered shrink Doc Samson would like you to tell him what his back muscles look like. It’s like a rorschach test, only pretty much naked.
T’challa/Black Panther would like you to join him in the shower.
Thor does not wish to play volleyball, but if you insist…
Northstar, notable for being one of the very first openly gay characters in American Comics, goes commando.
If you know anything about Rogue, you will know that her powers mean she can’t make skin to skin contact with another living being without risking killing them. So, please, ignore that canonical issue and just check out Gambit in a banana hammock:
Sadly, the last Marvel Illustrated Swimsuit Special was in 1995. But I say it’s high time for SOMEONE to start putting out half-naked pin-ups of muscular men in comics, dammit.