THIS JUST IN:

Buzznet blogger Ashly, also known as the newageamazon, has been cast in a remake of “The Princess Bride.” The film will also star the decaying husk of Jonny Lee Miler’s career and will feature Coyote (bulletproofheeb) as Vizzini.

“We’re actually changing the story around a little while staying true the original vision,” Ashly was quoted as saying. “For example, my character’s not really a peasent-turned-princess anymore, she’s actually some type of faerie. Or something. Oh, and she might also be a motor-cycle riding ninja. I haven’t read the whole script yet.”

This news comes hot on the heels of the announcement that Jessica Simpson and her father are planning to destroy all that is good and right in this world.