Which Valentine’s Day Social Media Role Are You?

Valentine’s Day is a day full of mixed emotions. Either you love it, hate it or overthink it. Do you want to embrace your love for a significant other or rain on someone’s parade? Find out how you can contribute to our social media society by playing one of these simple roles.

1. I’M IN A RELATIONSHIP : )

That’s right! You’ve done it! You’re not alone! Now it’s time to let the world know! It doesn’t matter if you’re posting to impress your significant other or to impress your followers, the tangible proof that you are in a relationship is out there. What gifts did you get them? What gifts did they get you? Regardless of us caring, you HAVE to let us know!

2. I’M SINGLE, BUT I SWEAR I’M FINE : (

Looks like another February 14th you’ll be spending alone. Don’t worry, friend, there are plenty of opportunities to stay busy today! Let us know how you don’t need to be with someone and joke about how much food you’ll be eating to make up for it. Maybe you’re buying some drinks for yourself or just spending a day with your friends and calling it a “date” when really, everyone knows you’re not actually dating them. You’re better than today. You’re independent, but posting publicly isn’t a cry for help.

3. I’M SINGLE AND LOOKING ; )

Jeez, today sure is lonely, does anyone wanna come over and snuggle or cuddle or watch a movie? I mean, I’m not sure if cold calls for cuddling have ever worked in the history of Facebook, but I do know that it’s sending a message. You are single. You are all riled up seeing everyone else’s posts and you want to be part of this fantastic relationship world. Well, maybe you’re just smart and using today to your advantage to snag a sexy single. If this doesn’t work out, look into J Date, Christian Mingle, Black People Meet, Farmers Only or some other super sexy site designed just for you.

4. IT’S A HALLMARK HOLIDAY >8 0

That’s right. Valentine’s Day isn’t a REAL holiday. Sure, it’s on the calendar and people all over celebrate it, but it’s just one big scam big Hallmark to sell cards and make that dough. Single or not, by celebrating it or acknowledging it, you’re just giving into the system. Post Rage Against The Machine lyrics and let your ANGER out today. Everyone else is a pawn, but you? YOU GET IT.

5. I’M GOING TO POST ANYTHING ELSE TRYING TO IGNORE TODAY

“Yeah so everyone keeps talking about Valentine’s Day, but all I can think about today is THE NEW EPISODE OF (insert TV show)” You acknowledge today exists, but there is no way in hell you’re about to let anyone know that. You’re not like them. You’re quirky and weird and random and crazy. I bet if you had to pick a random number it would be SEVEN. If you had to think of the funniest word, it would be MONKEY. See? You’re an individual. Keep following shiny objects and pretending you’re the lead female role in Garden State.

So which one are you?