Bravery Girl Fighting With Anorexia And Inspiring World
“I do not know what I feel anymore. One minute I want to be ”good ” and do what I am supposed to, I get happy when the staff says how well I am doing and I really want to be healthy, and in the next second it turns and I hate everything, want to be rebellious, forget about everything, go home and just give up. I just hate everyone and everything. First, I feel like a failure when the staff says I’m doing good because that means that I’m gaining weight. That I will be fat again . That I’m on my way to where I fought so hard to get away from. That I’m loosing control. That I loose and ” health wins .” And then I think the opposite, that I want to eat lots and just gain weight and show that FUCKING anorexian that I am stronger. That I’ll win.”– “Confused” from Antonia’s blog, posted one year ago.
Eating disorders are not easy to treatment. Fighting with anorexia or bulimia is a huge challenge. These illness can touch everyone. Unfortunately, often we don’t see the first signals of it and the next struggle with this “monster” is very complicated. So, I want to show you bravery girl, she inspires people to fight.
Antonia Eriksson is a beautiful teenage from Sweden and amazing a fitness blogger. Although Antonia is just 18 it during the last months she through by a battle about her own life. She was hospitalized in September 2012, the reason was anorexia.
“My anorexia started in the beginning of 2012, but didn’t get out of hand until the summer, and in September 2012 I was admitted to the hospital where I had to stay for two months”
“My heart and organs were giving up, my bones were weak, and my reflexes had stopped working.”
“I had given up, and if I hadn’t been admitted to the hospital then, I don’t know if I would have survived another night. My weight was at 38 kg [about 84 pounds] the day I was admitted.”
Antonia uses Instagram account to show the world her recovery and journey from anorexia to health:
“When I first started @eatmoveimprove, it was actually called @fightinganorexia and it was an anonymous account. It took me a while before I decided to share my identity. So I had this account alongside my personal [Instagram account] to track my recovery, and then it grew and changed into what it is today.”
“If I put it on Facebook, it would be everyone I knew, and they’d know everything about how I felt and maybe judge me. It’s just one part of my life and I share it with people who also had that part of their lives.”
“Instagram helped me a lot. I found other people who felt the same way or were struggling with battles like my own, We supported each other a lot and when I was feeling low I could always turn to my ‘Instagram family’ for support and advice.I felt I had a responsibility since I had a lot of followers who looked up to me and saw me as an inspiration … it became very important to me to recover in a good way and to stay healthy. To show people that it was possible and worth it.”
Antonia is owner fitness blog where she shares with followers her life and answers on questions, but all the time she is careful what she posts…..
“People ask how much I weigh or how many calories I eat, and I won’t talk about that. I don’t want to share numbers because I know that triggered me, and I don’t want that to be what my account is about,’ she said.”
“I do post progress pictures, and that took me awhile. But followers were asking how my workouts were going so I decided to share more progress pictures—but I’m quite careful there too: I don’t talk about my body like I do about my progress. It’s not how I look, it’s how much energy I have or what I can lift in the gym”.
”’I’ll tell people off when they ask me how to lose weight. Me losing weight was me almost losing my life. You shouldn’t ask me how to do that. That’s like asking me how to commit suicide.”
She also shares her thoughts about thinspritations( e.g. photos, songs, movies, books which inspires to lose weight):
“The thinspo accounts did affect me while I was sick. When I got into recovery I stopped following all those accounts, but before I got to that point I found it affected me a lot”
“They are made to make girls feel awful about their bodies and they often succeed. It was those accounts that ‘helped me’ starve myself and stay sick.”
“They are like an extension of the already evil thoughts.Probably because the girls who write posts like that are sick themselves. It’s really quite sad.”
And I’m so proud of Antonia because she motivates a lot young girls and boys to struggle this war about own life. I think that her photo blog is good advice for everyone who need to tip. For me she is someone unique because she promotes healthy life. I hope that this bravery girl will win every battle. Antonia, good luck!!!!
“Anorexia is part of my history and a disease I once had, but it does not define me as a person. Today I share my life, what I love to do, and who I am. Anorexia is not a part of that, but it was, and I still want to be a support and inspiration for people who are struggling.”
*quotes from Daily Dotphotos: Antonia Eriksson