10 Things I Learned From Pee Wee’s Big Adventure

In the Church of Richard, we celebrate very few things. Our high holidays include things like Free Candy Day (Halloween), Free Presents Day (not our born day), and today – Pee Wee Day. Yes, today is a time most revered – for it is the day that our Lord & Saviour Paul Rubens exited the funhouse that was his mother’s body and took center stage in the black comedy that is our lives.

I don’t even remember when I first saw Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. I was a small halfling and dare I say rather impressionable. There are many things in that movie that I still hold dear to my heart and I am going to tell you about all of them today.


Please to gaze upon the Pee Wee doll that I have in my house and talk to when I feel alone. So utterly alone:

Onward with the 10 Things I Learned From Pee Wee’s Big Adventure!

1. Bicycles

I am not ashamed to blame my love of cycling on this film. Pee Wee loves his bicycle. The first thing I learned how to do on my bicycle as a kid were all the tricks Pee Wee did.

2. Always Eat A Bad Ass Breakfast

Because Pee Wee will pitty the foo that doesn’t eat Mr. T cereal. And you don’t want that.

3. Always Listen To Reason

Because we don’t make monkeys, we just train em. Well actually, that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense but listening to reason usually means paying attention and doing things right instead of having to do them over again. Get it right the first time.

4. Don’t Be Afraid To Go Against the Grain

This might go against #3 but that’s okay. Sometimes things go awry so that even more awesome adventures can happen.

5. Take Time Out of Life To Danse

Dancing is awesome. You never know when busting a move will get you out of a strange situation.

6. Don’t Be Afraid To Look At Life In A New Way

You never know what you’ll see once you have a new perspective.

7. Don’t Forget To Brushie Brushie Brushie

Because it’s gross if you don’t. Don’t be that person.

8. Sometimes Taking Rides With Strangers Isn’t the Worst

I mean, when else will you ever get to ride with ex cons and ghosts? Not rly. Be careful out there.

9. Do the Right Thing

Sometimes doing the right thing might go against your values but don’t be that asshat that let the snakes die in a fire. Do what you KNOW is right. Always.

10. Stay What You Are

Stay rebellious and give em hell, no matter what.

Happy Birthday, Paul Rubens!

What did you learn from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure?

Also, never get caught.