Hiatus, Hope And Heartache: The Mind Of A Fall Out Boy Fan

Friday 25th January 2013 and the internet went into over-drive with Fall Out Boy ‘news’, once again. As a Fall Out Boy fan, I decided to process my thoughts by writing my reactions to any revelations and rumours. Here is my diary of the night. World, welcome inside my mind.

8:00pm GMT.

Another typically rock ‘n’ roll night for me, sitting on my sofa watching Mastermind. As I saw knowledge of African animals and Lord Nelson being tested, I wondered what my specialist subject would be. I quickly decided that it would have to be Fall Out Boy.

8:30pm GMT.

Continuing my decadent lifestyle, I spent my Friday night engrossed in Coronation Street. However, during the advert break I visited Fall Out Boy’s Wikipedia to test my knowledge. I was my own quiz-master. I skim-read it all – I knew it all, apart from one small detail – the inspiration behind the set design of their Honda Civic tour. I’ve since learnt that it was a development of Where The Wild Things Are. I was saddened that I didn’t know this, but I smiled because I then believed that I knew EVERYTHING – except, I didn’t know anything at all really.

When I scrolled down to the bottom of their Wikipedia, I spotted “Hiatus” and shuddered at the sight of the h-word. However, I smiled when I read the reunion rumours. For the last few weeks, I’ve allowed myself to believe that there is truth in those rumours and when Wikipedia reasoned that they were likely to be true because of the unfortunate lack of success experienced by both Pete Wentz and Patrick Stump in their side projects, I started to agree that if the hiatus would ever end, it would probably end now.

08:50pm GMT.

Suddenly remembered my recent blog post. What if my misleading “Which Fueled By Ramen Band Have Entered The Studio After Their Hiatus? headline, written in relation to The Hush Sound, wasn’t so misleading after all?

I thought more about the “ifs” of a reunion, then confessed that I’d rather hear more of Patrick Stump solo than in Fall Out Boy (controversial opinion, maybe).

9:00pm GMT.

After pushing the thoughts of Fall Out Boy to one side, I sat down to relax with just the TV – and no phone. However, an advert break tempted me to visit my Facebook. At that point my entire evening changed.

The top post was by my friend, and fellow Buzznet blogger, Dora (dottionvacation) who’d shared the Property of Zack blog post ‘confirming’ Fall Out Boy’s reunion. I just stared in shock before posting a reply. When I asked her whether this was real, Dora responded with “Where were you in the last 20 minutes? The internet is blowing up!”. WHAT!?

I went offline again to process my thoughts after a few reactionary social network posts.

9:30pm GMT.

I began pacing my bedroom and shaking in shock. Melodramatic from an outsider’s perspective, perhaps, but a fellow fan will understand. Fall Out Boy have been in my life for the last eight years, but they also left mine in 2009.

My initial reaction was euphoria because of the thought of new music but then I quickly started to worry about them not being “the same” as before. I’m not afraid of change, unless it’s a step in the wrong direction. I’m sure the band are faced with the same anxieties. After realising that I felt that Fall Out Boy had always made positive progressions as a band, I was confident that the new material (if it exists) would do the band’s legacy justice.

I was happy.

09:40pm GMT.

I decided to start typing up my thoughts ‘live’.

09:50pm GMT.

Looking at Twitter is making me feel anxious. There’s so much hype about a Fall Out Boy ‘reunion’, I’m worried it’ll all come crashing down when someone quashes it. Worse, I’m scared that someone will deny it when it really IS true. I already feel lied to. I am not stupid – I know I have no ownership over a band, and I try to resist all conspiracies but I couldn’t help feeling that I, and all Fall Out Boy fans, have been lied to. The resurgence of Fall Out Boy posters in magazines, the tweets by Beau Bokan and Keltie Colleen among others and the quietening nature of the band member’s side projects (and the band members, in general) all lead me to believe that there is some kind of an underground reunion. People who know people who know people know that SOMETHING is going on, if not exactly what. Perhaps the band are just “trying something out” and don’t want to make an announcement in case things don’t work. Or perhaps they know exactly what they were doing and have a PR team deliberately eking out rumours to keep interest in them alive. I hate the idea of the latter. I hope that one’s nonsense.

10:00pm GMT.

I see the headline “Joe Trohman Denies Rumours” on my Twitter timeline. I ignore/deny it. My previous comments now seem rather ironic.

10:10pm GMT.

I’m too scared to read the aforementioned article. I don’t know what to hope for. If I wish for the denial to be a lie then I’m wishing for exactly what I hate, but if I wish for it to be true then I’m killing all hopes of a reunion. I keep thinking of the Patrick Stump solo lyric “If it seems too good to be true, guess what, it probably is”. I could probably continue quoting “The ‘I’ In Lie” – someone’s being unfaithful here, I just can’t decide whether it’s the rumour mill or Fall Out Boy themselves.

I Put The Hate in Hiatuses.

Who Put The Lie In Believe?

10:15pm GMT.

I read the Decayfans link, and Joe Trohman‘s tweet below it, my heart sinks. My heart sinks in the same way it did when the band denied rumours the time before this, and the time before that, and the time before that – except more so than ever, because I trusted Property of Zack more than any other source. @trohman says everything is “untrue, unreal”, I feel deflated. I’m angry, but I’m not sure who I’m angry at. Perhaps, it’s myself, or maybe it’s the internet. Why did I believe all this?

10:20pm GMT.

I wish bands would break-up, rather than go on “breaks”. I HATE the ambiguity of “FAQ: Fall Out Boy never broke up, we’re just not touring right now“. Well, if you’re NOT touring and you’re NOT recording (and you have NO intentions of doing either), then haven’t you broken up?

I remember when Busted broke-up. They were the first band I ever ‘loved’ who broke up. My Mum comforted me by saying “At least they did the right thing and split rather than telling fans they might come back when they knew they wouldn’t”. I agreed. Of course, in the case of Busted, it didn’t stop reunion rumours but it did give my broken-hearted self the chance to move on.

I’m still convinced that a lot of bands go on hiatus just to keep merch sales alive for a few more years after a split. Feel free to call me a cynic.

10:25pm GMT.

PupFresh use the headline “Joe Trohman Lies To Everyone“. I laugh, even though I know I shouldn’t. I feel cheated that a band is waiting for the green light of an official announcement rather than simply telling fans the truth – if that is the case. The band do not have to comment on these rumours – they could stay silent, rather than lie (again, if that is what they’re doing).

10:30pm GMT.

I’m taking a break to watch The Last Leg. I need a breather. I’ve accepted that I might stay up all night reading rumours and go mad in the process.

11:00pm GMT.

The Wire‘s Idris Alba was on The Last Leg. He guested on Patrick Stump‘s solo EP ‘ruant Wave‘. Why must everything in my life somehow connect to Fall Out Boy? He featured on ‘Big Hype‘. That song is feeling rather relevant right now. “Big hype, big let-down……..Don’t believe the hype”. Ha. How appropriate.

11:45pm GMT.

Apparently, I’ve spent 45 minutes proof-reading my thoughts so far for spelling mistakes. I bet you can still spot a typo. I know nothing more about the FOB situation.

11:50pm GMT.

I return to Twitter. Alter The Press! post a Fall Out Boy update saying “management are denying rumours and any plans at this time”. Initially, the “at this time” gives me hope and makes me think they are just keeping quiet until a press conference. Then, I read the quote from the band’s manager Bob McLynn saying “the band is not together“. Does “not together” mean still on hiatus, or 100% split? Has today really gone from “Fall Out Boy are back!” to “Fall Out Boy will NEVER be back!” that quickly? I think I’ve read too much into that.

12:00pm GMT.

As today turns into tomorrow, and in the words of Fall Out Boy, “I will never believe in anything again”. Until the next rumour emerges on the internet, that is. I’m going to leave the internet for the night, and sleep. When I wake up, the world will come around – right?

00:10am GMT.

Good night. Nothing’s happening. When I wake up – I demand an answer.

What are your thoughts on this situation?