BSTA #23: Christmas….

Christmas, Christmas, Christmas….. true is that I don’t like the Christmas and New Year Time because I’m always more than alone in this time.

And about my Christmas:

In every year in my school a few day before Christmas we had a “Christmas Eve”. We brought food and ate together and sang but I didn’t like it.. and in high school I wasn’t on Christmas Eve.

But home:

I celebrated Christmas when I was a kid. It was like in traditional family.. I cared about Christmas tree. I loved it. And I remember how my mom did everything, you know this atmosphere.

And the Christmas Eve- I remember how we waited for the first star on the Christmas Tree and next we prayed and ate together. To the moment when I was about 11 always I take a little handmade gifts.. for their it was weird. The reason was that at my home wasn’t Christmas gifts… but always my sis received something because she has the name day in 24th December. I remember how much sad I was when my “friends” treated me weird because at my home wasn’t Christmas gifts.

For me the Christmas wasn’t about gifts just about family and atmosphere… but 2 years ago I met the true Santa Claus. He visited my city and his wife is Polish!!!

But one year ago and in this year I did some gift to someone. Hope that this person will be happy about it.

And now if I still don’t understand why people spending everything for the Christmas ….. if I could to met the Santa’s Claus I would to please him just about the love, hope, happiness and wax crayons or pastels..I know that I sound so pathetic….

But now we don’t celebrate… I’m atheist… ok but I miss to the family atmosphere… I’m sick of the quarrels and

And New Year- always this eve I’m alone with my laptop….

Really I don’t like the Christmas/New Year because this is a symbol of the pain and being alone…