10 Things That Are Happening on May 21st Besides The Rapture

If you haven’t heard, The Rapture, aka Le Second Coming of Jebus – not the danz-punk band, is happening on Saturday, the 21st of May. Although I would prefer the latter to happen and release me from the hell of the music that engulfs me today, I have to admit that the actual biblical Rapture would be pretty rad to witness.

So yeah.. I’m gonna need you all to come in on Caturday..

According to this one dude, he has done a maths and calculated that Jesus is coming back to us on Saturday. Want to read this for yourself because I don’t have the brain power to read or explain any of this to you? Yes. Yes you do. Go here. Want to read about how people are spending their life savings to run out of money exactly on the 21st? Yes, you do. You can read about it here.

Rather than get into how all of this is a bunch of mega-nonsense, let us just talk about things that actually will happen on May 21st.

10. They Honey Badger still won’t give a shit.

9. Britney Spears is gonna keep on dancing till the world actually ends

8. People will be walking in the woods to celebrate National Walk in the Woods Day

From: Etsy

7. Some shit is going to go down in the TARDIS:


6. Arnold Schwarzenegger will announce another love child and it will be Kuato:

5. The U.S Air Guitar Texas Regional Championships will take place

4. The Red Bull Soap Box Race will take over Downtown Los Angeles

3. Lady Gaga and Justin Timberlake are supposed to host Saturday Night Live

2. Goths will be preparing for the next day, which is World Goth Day:

1. The world isn’t going to end

Even if the world does end on Caturday, look at all this cool stuff you can do instead of fretting about it. So, do you think the rapture is going to come? Will I be eating a slice of humble pie in hell? Oh and:

That is all. Enjoy the rest of your time here on Earth!