X-Men vs. Vampires vs. My Sanity

I like the X-Men. They helped me get over my “fear of being different” as a teenager and are somewhat directly responsible for my love of comics.

I like vampires. They’re just pretty damn cool.

But combining the two is just leaving a bad taste in my mouth.

In the newest X-Men series, which kicks off with X-Men #1, the team of mutants go face to face with…um…VAMPIRES.

DON’T GET ME WRONG: the idea of Emma Frost going mind-to-mind with Edward Cullen (Look, I’m just saying: incredibly powerful telepath versus vampire brat…I’ll let you guess how that’ll turn out) or of Wolverine (as played by Hugh Jackman) and Eric Northman rolling around and beating each other up, preferably shirtless? Both incredibly appealing.

But somehow, I have a feeling it’s not going there.

Of course, they really have to be cruel and use variant (and non-canonical) covers to lure me in. WHY MUST YOU GIVE ME THINGS I LIKE, MARVEL COMICS?

BOTH OF THESE SCENARIOS INTRIGUE ME. Sadly, of course, neither of them will actually play out in the comics.

(VAMPIRE GAMBIT IS ABOUT TO BITE WILLING VICTIM ROGUE. HOLY. SHIT.)

But then there’s more! Vampire variant covers for other Marvel comics!

Vampire Hulk!

And Vampire Iron Man!

Tony Stark, you wear an iron suit, so I’m guessing you didn’t get bitten during a fight. Admit it, dude. You got drunk and slept with a vampire. Trust me, a lot of us have been there.

Am I the only one who thinks this is just a bit much? And really would like the vampire thing to die down for awhile?