Gallery of Fail – Halloween Madness Is Upon Us!

Halloween is a lot like baking a cake. You either carefully prepare your ingredients and create something tasty for all to enjoy or you end up serving something that people may only enjoy out of pity. Before we can bask in the glory Halloween, we must look at the travesties. It will make looking at costumes done right all the better by comparison. While searching the internet for Halloween Photos of Fail, I came across a vast sea of inappropriateness. I would enjoy showing you photos that go against our Terms of Service but I would also like to keep my job. What I bring to your plate are some serious morsels for your visual consumption. Try as I might, my descriptions may not be able to capture the magnitude of fail contained in these photos. I urge you to make your own remarks should I leave something out.

Nothing says “Homemade” like cardboard. Granted, cardboard robots can be testaments to creativity but obviously, this one isn’t. Not to toot my own horn-a-plenty, but to see how cardboard robots are done right, check <b><a href=”//″>this out here</a></b>. The maker of this costume clearly thinks pulling together some scraps with duct and masking tape means they are pulling the wool over our collective eyes. This probably took 5 minutes to make. You might as well buy a mask from Walmart.

The following costume is fun. It is not the only variation out in circulation amongst those that should remain in their parents basement. I saw many of this next “costume” on the internet. There is a great army of the socially inept that use Halloween to show you how tasteless they are. It’s not that I am against people having fun but I really wonder if this lures in the desired target:

Not only does this champ look like a creep to begin with, but his costume makes that all the more clear. I wonder if his stalker like wardrobe came with this contraption. It looks like the only boob being placed there is behind those sun glasses.

Never Nudes of the world unite! Assemble and cry out to this impostor and his blotchy skin! The above costume should look like this:

This isn’t so bad, right? Wrong! This photo couldn’t be any more creepier. We all love “Where The Wild Things Are” and with the movie soon to come, you can bet there will be more costumes of the like about this year. The child looks like it about to be eaten by something wicked. Somehow, all the cute was sucked out of this pair and replaced with genuine evil. I am concerned about this photo. I have notified the authorities.

Go ahead and squint. Rub your eyes. I will have you know that whatever you do, yes, you are really looking at that. The joys of the Man-Child are many. They are the examples you use to scare your children into behaving correctly, lest they turn into what we can only guess came from the bottom of the clearance barrel at Big Lots last year. I don’t know what is more offensive: the Spy Kids poster in the back or the Spider Man under-roos with eyes on the crotch. Someone is clearly out of their prescription psychotropics. I don’t know if I want to hug the Man-Child as I wrap him in a robe and tell him everything is going to be o.k. or spray him with mace.

We all love couples. Am I right? Probably not. We love couples that hang on each other to clearly mark their territory and make me uneasy with their displays of public affection. As if we don’t have to put up with you two cooing constantly, you decide to assert your gender roles with outlandish costumes. Alas, there is no love in my heart if you step out of the door looking like the following:

I guess Halloween truly is the mask you get to smash once a year and state your discontent for your mate. As if it wasn’t obvious enough, you are a ball (complete with chain for $9.99) that weights down your partner. That is the exact statement I want to make with my loved one.

Since we are enforcing gender rolls on Halloween, let me remind you that you are the girl and I the boy. Just in case you forget, let us take a trip to Camp Obvious and pitch our respective tents.

Now, here are some photos of dogs in their fancy get ups:

Should you be choosing a costume for yourself, your mate, or your pets, choose wisely, lest you end up in some snarky bloggers blog.

Seeing as how all of ye, dear readers, are able to scour the internet more effectively than I, this is the part where you get to find photos of your favorite Halloween fails. I know you have pictures of your friends in compromising get ups, so let’s see ’em!