Only YOU Can Help Prevent Uwe Boll

Occasionally a name in film comes along that can tell a story so moving, so powerful, that it makes the audience weep from sheer beauty.

Uwe Boll, however, makes movies that can cause the audience to weep with laughter. Which would be okay if the man were making comedies.

This is the man who has brought us such brilliant pieces of work as Alone in the Dark, House of the Dead and Bloodrayne. Somehow, this man manages to get his hands on movies based on video game franchises and then proceeds to maim and desecrate them until they no longer resemble the work they were based on and are now simply wretched pieces of filth left scattered about the horizon.

This is also the man who agreed to box people who didn’t like his movies. He’s also verbally sparred with critics, proving himself to be if nothing else a master of the single entendre. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Uwe Boll is a man’s man, a master debater and an unstoppable force.

Or IS he?

From a recent interview with Fearnet.com:

Are you aware that there is a petition online, signed by 18,000 people, requesting that you stop making movies?

Yeah, I know that. 18,000 is not enough to convince me.

How many would it take?

One million. Now we have a new goal.

Oh, Uwe. You really shouldn’t challenge the internet. We bite back.

Please, ladies and gentlemen, sign the petition to stop Uwe Boll.

If you need more convincing? He’s currently signed on to make Alone in the Dark II and Bloodrayne 3.