Liveblogging the 2008 Scream Awards Telecast on Spike TV

Tonight is the telecast of 2008 Scream Awards on Spike TV and I’ll be here live blogging the whole thing starting at 9PM EST. Come join me on the intertubes as they air performances by Kerli and The Smashing Pumpkins, as well as appearances by Selma Blair, Jon Favreau, Milla Jovovich, Jaime King, Kristen Bell, Julie Benz, Guillermo Del Toro, Summer Glau, Jared Padelecki, Seth Rogen, Seann William Scott, Kevin Smith, Liv Tyler, Rob Zombie, Samuel L. Jackson and this geeky kid named Gerard Way. Plus, a Twilight world premier I will likely need your help getting through.

The ceremony was actually on Saturday night, and Buzznet‘s own kindofadraag was there. Check out her EXCLUSIVE interview with Gerard on the red carpet, her summary of the night’s events and all the awesome pictures she got of Gerard on the red carpet, the highlights of the show and the shots of The Smashing Pumpkins she scored before they kicked her out. And make sure to leave her some Buzzlove for not only doing all of this for us fans, but for managing to get out of there with all of her illegal pictures intact!

IT ALL STARTS TONIGHT AT 9 PM EST!

8:53 PM: Okay, we’re just getting to the Teddy Bear Picnic scene from The Empire Strikes Back. Poor Harrison Ford.

9:00 PM: Show opens with Kate Beckinsale, “honoring a legend.”

9:02: Legend is Anthony Hopkins. “I ate his liver with some fava beans…and a nice Chianti…”

9:03 Well, I don’t have any Chianti to toast with…I’d better get me a glass of Vampire wine. I’mma need it tonight!

9:05 Hopkins called the audience strange like three times in his acceptance speech. Awesome.

9:06 Kevin Smith and Seth Rogen are out to present. There is a guy with horns on in the audience.

Seth Rogen and Keven Smith are telling porn jokes. Awesome.

THE COCK KNIGHT: “BECAUSE BATMAN AS A CHARACTER ISN’T GAY ENOUGH.”HELLBOY 2: THE GOLDEN SHOWERWANTED…ANAL…TONS OF IT…IN MY FACEHANCOCK…IS ALREADY PORNIFIED.

Best Fantasy Movie: HELLBOY 3: THE GOLDEN ARMY

9:11 PM Guys, I’m ten minutes in and you’re plugging the finale? Granted, I’m pretty sure that’s where Gerard Way gets involved, but STILL.

Also? Frank Miller is scary looking.

9:16 Kristen Bell and Stan Lee. Stan Lee just said it doesn’t matter what he says because everyone will be concentrating on Kristen.

Ooooh, comic book awards! Awesome!

Somebody just yelled “You’re the man, Stan!”

Best Comic Book: Y: The Last Man

Totally deserved it, yo.

Cam’s here to introduce the Twilight premier. He looks totally confused.

Premier is of the ballet school scene. Cam is really, REALLY good in this role. God I wish his character got to win in the end 🙁

And…it’s over, and now Gary Oldman is on stage.

Oh God, Gary Oldman is out here to present Heath Ledger‘s posthumous awards for “Best Fantasy Actor” and “Best Villain.”

He accepted the award with “Well done, mate!” OH geeze ;_;

9:26 You know, my mind is now dreaming up some strange Buzznet version of “Saw.” I need more to drink.

“We’re going to play a game, Bree. Before you, you see William Beckett and a razor. In order to escape this trap, you’ll have to shave his head. If you refuse, you both die.”

9:29 Oooh, the Osbournes’ entrance was great. And Kelly looks AMAZING. Wow.

Sharon’s dress is very Morticia Addams.

Best TV Show: Dexter

Oh, Rob Zombie! And they added, his remake of Halloween won for “Best Remake.

Rob had to look at the envelope to figure out what he was presenting for…

Best Science Fiction Female: Milla Jovovich for Resident Evil: Extinction

“I feel like the coolest mom in town!” Not bad. This was after she tried to talk into the microphone.

But before she dropped an f-bomb.

Summer Glau and Thomas Decker are introducing Kerli!

Wow. This is supremely creepy. It’s like Mirrormask, but sexier…

Okay, that performance was awesome. Very appropriate, too.

“…Mark, you pride yourself on your athletic ability. But that will not be enough to save you here. Hidden somewhere within your bicycle is a key that will release you from the trap currently wrapped around your head. You have five minutes to find it before the trap snaps. I’d suggest you move quickly…”

9:45 We’re back with Sean William Scott.Best Supporting Performance: CRAZY GARY OLDMAN! For The Dark Knight

Winona Rider!

And she just referenced Beetlejuice!

Scream Immortal Award: Tim Burton!

Gah, I’d forgotten about Mars Attacks!

Oh, wow. There’s spinning fire hoops involved in his entrance…

And now he’s coming down in his balloon to the theme from Beetlejuice!

Heh, his whole speech is about coming down in the balloon! He’s afraid of heights!

“…so, Mr. Rossstar, you call yourself a DJ? Well, before you, you see a priceless collection of vinyl albums by Bruce Springsteen, Bon Jovi and The Misfits…

“…okay, yes, and Green Day. Lots of Green Day…

“…when this tape stops, the spikes above you will begin lowering. The only way to save yourself is to load all of those records into the furnace at your side. Every. Last. One of them. Good luck.”

9:59 The Cast of The Spirit and Frank Miller.

Frank sounds kind of confused. I’m refrain from making any whoreswhoreswhores jokes. For once…

Best Science Fiction Movie: Iron Man

Video from Robert Downey Jr. who’s currently filming “Sherlock Holmes” in London.

Heh, “First and formouse…FORMOUSE?”

Y HALLO THAR, GUY RICHIE.

Jared Padalecki and Danielle Panabaker introduce the Friday 13th World Premier.

OKAY, WOW. That looks legitimately scary.

“Elrich, you take your time to delete illegal images from people’s accounts. But if you lose this game, you will be deleted. You are strapped to your chair, surrounded by a bear trap. If you cannot delete every single illegal copy of the pictures of Gerard Way from the Scream Awards before time runs out, the trap will trigger. And you will die.”

10:10 Neve Campbell…is looking bad with curly hair. But she’s here to present a special award to Wes Craven.

Mastermind Award: Wes Craven

Wes Craven “There’s been a lot of uses of the ‘F’ Word tonight…so I thought I’d join…’fans…'”

Marylin Manson!

“There’s only one place where the art of mutilation gets it’s proper respect…outside of my bedroom…”

Most Memorable Mutilation: Penis bitten off by vagina with teeth, from Teeth

“The Little Vagina that Could.” It sounds like an MSI song…

10:22 Julie Benz from Dexter! And Buffy back the day! HI DARLA!

Best Director: Christopher Nolan for The Dark Knight

Best Screenplay: Christopher and Jonathan Nolan for The Dark Knight

Ron Perlman is on stage! His mouth is GIGANTIC.

Best Horror Actress: Liv Tyler for The Strangers

Smashing Pumpkins and Watchmen premier are coming up!

“Now, Ashly, you know the thin line that a person can walk between being a hero and being a villain. It comes with your study of literature. But you have fallen off of that line. This test will figure out which side you’ve landed on. At your neck is a razor sharp wire, just beyond the point of cutting into your skin. In front of you is an unedited manuscript by Stephenie Meyer. You must read the manuscript the whole way through. If you stop, close your eyes or look away, the wire will cut deep into your throat, slicing your vocal chords. And you will bleed to death, unable to scream. Enjoy your reading…”

10:34 SMASHING PUMPKINS!

Sa-wheeeeet

GERARD WAY!

OH GOD, IS THAT THE OWL SHIP BEHIND HIM? IS GERARD WAY STANDING IN FRONT OF THE OWL SHIP INTRODUCING WATCHMEN?! HOLY SHIT. HOLY SHIT.

HIS EXCITED LITTLE FACE!

Zach Snyder and the cast of Watchmen are actually introducing the clip.

WORLD PREMIER. WATCHMEN.

Guys, if nothing else, this movie is going to be visually BREATHTAKING.

Rosario Dawson is presenting “The Ultimate Scream” award.

The Ultimate Scream: The Dark Knight.

That’s not surprising. Can’t disagree, but not surprising.

Samuel L. Jackson!

Comic Con Icon Award: George Lucas the father of Star Wars

OH MY GOD, HE’S BEING ESCORTED IN BY STORM TROOPERS.

And the entire audience has green lightsticks! AMAZING.

“At last, the Universe is mine!”

He is the first non-comic artist to receive this award. And it’s fitting. Where would scifi be without Lucas?

And SLJ ended the show the only way possible:

“May the Force by with you.”