writersblock Blog and Journals

I've got like a major writer's block!!!!!!!! I've been sitting at my desk staring at the same stinkin piece of paper for about two hours!!!! Uh! I have lots of ideas for my new story but I just don't know how to begin. This is sad :(

I will try to post Chapter 1 of my new story someday this week, if possible. School has started again, which means college classes will start again too, so that has me stressed out.

BUT I PROMISE I WILL HAVE CHAPTER 1 UP BY WEDNESDAY! IF NOT, I WILL KILL MYSELF (not literally :P)

In the meantime, how about a chapter of Forever Friends?

Tonight?....Tomorrow?....

you decide.

<3

Mai

 

Chapter 5

Oh, oh, how could you do it? Oh I ... I never saw it coming, oh, oh I need an ending, so why can't you stay, just long enough to explain?

 

 

Hayley left promptly, a lucky two minutes before my parents got home. They seemed to think something was up, anyhow, from my non-wavering smile and also the strand of red hair on my shoulder.

Taylor and Jeremy left after a little while. Neither of them mentioned Hayley - or the boyfriend I hated so bad, once. For some reason, I was glad about this.

I lazed in my room for a while after that - phone in hand, texting Hayley nx - just like we used to. Then she met Chad in the supermarket and stopped texting back.

Depressed, I chucked my phone on my dressing table and collapsed onto my bed, avoiding the place where Hayley had been several hours ago. Eventually I kicked at the indent there. Zac joined me soon.

'Video games?' he suggested, holding up two Playstation 3 controllers. I grinned at my little brothers efforts. 'Sure,' I grabbed one and inserted it into the Playstation.

We settled for a game of MarioKarts. As my character - Luigi - overtook Zac's character - Mario - and knocked him out of the way, Zac said 'what's up you and Hayley?'

'You're just trying to distract me,' I told him, avoiding his question.

Mario fell further behind. 'C'mon, you totally froze her out,' he complained as Luigi hit Mario with a banana. 'What was that all about?'

'She called me a twat,' I answered frostily.

'So?' Mario flew of the cliff. 'Most of my friends call me a twat everything couple of minutes,' Zac managed to shrug.

'Hayley and I aren't like you and your stupid friends, okay?' I answered angrily, sending Luigi into some bomb by accident. 'We've never argued. In all the time we've known each other, I've never sworn at her, she's never sworn at me.'

'Friends swear at each other all the time,' Zac informed me matter-of-factly, making Mario overtake Luigi. 'You're overreacting, Josh.'

'It's his fault,' I suddenly shouted. 'It's his fault we hardly ever speak - that she swore at me for the first time today. It's his fault,' Luigi forcefully knocked Mario off of the cliff.

'He's not the nicest guy in the world, but she likes him,' Zac argued, blood pumped faster through my head - my vision blurred. 'And you want to make her happy right?'

I didn't answer him and soon, he was forced to leave after that comment.

But he was right. And I didn't want him to be.

***

The next morning, I woke up early, even though I wasn't due to meet Hayley until one. As I lay in the bath, the tunes of Jimmy Eat World - Bleed American - emitted from my phone. I read the text from the certain red-headed girl who caused me so much pain, but so much happiness.

Rock n' Roll baby

, XD

Am thinking band prac latr?

See you at Starbucks,

Xx

 

With my heart practically living in midair the days, my fingers shook as I text her back.

We're all alone now

, XD

Sure, it's all good with me,

See you at Starbucks,

x

I felt like one of those over-obsessed girls with a crush - not that I had a crush on her. I hated Chad, though - and I had a plan.

I knew guys like Chad. I'd show no interest in being friends or otherwise with Hayley in front of him and he'd get bored and break up with her. Hayley would want to spend more time with me. We'd be best friends again.

Only, this plan involved a lot of patience - a lot of patience that I was so coincidentally lacking.

I got out of the bath and dried my hair with the towel. I pulled on my faded blue jeans, but later swapped them for my grey skinnies, then my black skinnies, then made torn black skinnies that were Hayley's favourite, matched eventually with my faded Bowling For Soup t-shirt.

It was almost eleven and I was already sitting in front of the TV, tapping my foot and waiting for time to catch up with my mind.

An eternity passed and the clock ticked to five past eleven. 'I'm going out,' I grunted, grabbing my skinny-armed Jack-The-Skeleton hoodie and rushed out of the house.

I didn't go to Starbucks; it was way to early. Instead, I headed straight to the park. It was empty.

I settled myself on my favourite swing and swung. I let the breeze envelop my face and I sighed.

'Hey stranger,' shit, just when I wanted to be alone.

I opened my eyes. Janet had plonked herself on the swing next to me.

I didn't answer her. 'Nice,' she observed. I said nothing.

'What's up with you?' she flicked her wavy peroxide blonde hair out of her eyes.

'Nothing,' I answered coldly. 'I just wanted to be alone.'

'I won't speak to you,' she promised, 'we can just sit, I promise.'

We sat - for about ten seconds at least.

'Have you got a girlfriend?' she asked with fake-interest. I almost laughed.

'No, I haven't,' I chuckled humourlessly, 'what if I told you I were gay?'

'You're not,' she said certainly, 'your shoes don't match your shirt.'

'What?' Oh shit, they were kind of bright, weren't they? Would that put Hayley off ... well, off choosing being friends with me over being lovers with Chad?

'Haha,' she was giggling. 'It's kinda obvious that they don't match.'

'Oh, right,' I answered frostily.

'Ah, don't be like that,' she said in a whiny-type voice. 'I didn't mean to be offensive.'

'Yeah alright.'

I checked my watch as discreetly as I could. Janet caught me.

'You want to get away?' she said it casually but there was hurt in her voice.

'No,' I answered a little more kindly than I usually would've. 'I'm meeting someone soon.'

'A girl?'

'No, my best friend,' I said coldly. Well ... I suppose she was a girl too ...

'Right.'

Silence again. It wasn't as piercing as the silence with Hayley but it was still silence.

'I'm going,' I got to my feet, 'see you around Janet.'

Damn. Now I hate to find somewhere else to sit alone. Janet seemed to finally realise that I wanted be alone.

'I'll go if you want ...' she volunteered.

'No, it's okay, I've gotta go anyway,' I lied smoothly. 'Bye Janet.'

I left before she could say anything else. I was counting the minutes - no, the seconds until it was time to meet Hayley.

***

It was almost one o'clock when I entered Starbucks. 'One Coffee please,' I ordered, glancing around for any sight of Hayley.

I settled myself at an empty table near the front window, so I could see Hayley coming. All I had to do now was wait.

Thoughts strayed to a song I'd been writing. Well this is not your fault, but if I'm without you then I will feel so small. And if you have to go ... we'll always know that you shine brighter than anyone does I thought to myself, tapping my fingers. I avoided the eyes of those around me who were smirking and giggling at my lonliness. They wouldn't be smirking when they saw how beautiful the girl I was meeting was.

Shut up

I practically screamed at myself. These kind of thoughts had got me into trouble before and they weren't starting again.

Half past one arrived slowly, but rather than giving up hope, I bought a second coffee and waited. Hayley would never stand me up. She was just late. She was usually late these days.

When two o'clock arrived, however, I was beginning to get worried. I'd already called her over seven times and left a few voicemails.

'Hayley call me,' I begged through the phone, 'if you're not coming then just say.'

I decided to wait another five minutes. Just five minutes, I promised myself, but when twenty past two slipped by, I found myself unable to move from my chair.

However, downing my sixth coffee at half past, I forced myself to my feet. She wasn't coming. She'd played me like a fool and - right now I was furious at her.

I headed right out the doors, giving the bin a good kick on my way out. 'I'm going!' I exclaimed as some guy from behind the counter rushed to escort me out. He backed off.

'Josh! Josh!' a desperate voice screamed from behind me. I turned around humourlessly to find Hayley running towards me.

'Josh, I'm sorry!' she shouted and I turned my back on her.

I turned my back on her and run away.

As far as I was concerned - our friendship was over.

Alright so I've got another competition coming up and here is the lyrics i'm using:

The feelings I have boil up in me
They're over flowing at the sides
It's red hot burning at the sides
Leaving marks and blisters as it travels with in

Making their way through my mouth
Releasing their evil in a way I despise
Hurting and torturing the ones I love
This horrid routine is one i'm sick of

The tears start to come as nausea takes over
This little ordeal lathers me with it's disgust
They've taken over no turning back now
And I don't know why but this I do allow

Kick and screaming shouting and fighting
Beating myself up over all this panic
Digging my nails deep into my skin
I need to be punished for this horrid sin

 

The only problems is I still need three more verses at the least, so here is where you come in, how do you feel when you are angry? What do you do? Do you take it out on others or keep it inside? How do you deal with it? Leave a comment and let me know.

 

xo VeniceJoanNikole

well,wow i usually start almost all my sentences with 'well' i have to stop that....anyways(i use 'anyways' alot too), before i start a new fanfic i usually write an idea of it in my notebook, or i'll write the chapters then post them........but this will be different......i'm not really sure what i want to do with this story i'm not sure if it's a one-shot or a fic.....for now it might be a one-shot then i might make it a fic when where the lines overlap is near ending if you want me too..and sorry if this may suck, i jsut thought of it, it's coming straight from my head..later if i have time i might re-write it if its that bad. well here it goes

---

Chasm

Please give me something, I'm so thirsty, I'm so thirsty

Have you ever felt like your whole life was great?

But there was something missing? You just couldn't put you finger on it?

Well thats how I feel I'm Hayley Williams, a junoir in highschool going to be a senior this year, living in Meridan, Mississippi. I live with Laura(my mom), Erica(my younger sister), and McKayla(my youngest sister). All my life, I've had changes, my dad leaving, which was pretty tragic for me, but I've pretty much gotten over it. My life without a few exceptions, is pretty much great. But I cannot help but ponder that there's something missing. Well my mom and dad never gave me a good look on love or how to treat someone right for that matter. Maybe, my life needed a change, a change that would be good. I'm thirsty for something, yet I do not know what I'm thirsty for, wow that probably doesn't make sense but you get what I mean.

"Hayley, honey, Could you come downstairs for a second?"

I heard my mom calling me, I put my ipod on my nightstand forgetting to pause "Faces in Disguise"by Sunny Day Real Estate.

I went down the stairs to see my mom in the kitchen, just chilling.

"Whats up,mom?" I asked

"Well, Hayley we're moving......."she said slowly, it seemed as though she was scared for my response.

"Oh, well then, where are we moving?" I asked, you would probably be shocked about my response, sure I'm going to miss my friends, my school, Meridan, my home. But like I said I think my life needed a change. Therefore, I was kind of content and excited about this. I wouldn't say I'm dissapointed in life, but there's some lacking in an area I'm unaware of.

With a shocked expression, my mom gaev me a response,"Oh, wow Hayley, I didn't know you would be calm about this, anyway we are moving to Franklin, Tennessee"

"Oh cool, I guess" with that, I went up the stairs, grabbed my laptop and Google'd Franklin, Tennesee.

As i read up on my soon-to-be new town/home, I found out it was a nice town, with a Spring-type atmosphere. Hmmm, doeesn't seem bad, not bad at all.

I glanced at my clock, noticing it was pretty late about 10:49PM, I should probably get some sleep.

---*~*---

I woke to the smell of breakfast being made, hmmm I love waking up to that smell. Especially when mom is cooking. As I walked down the stairs McKayla and Erica were already sitting on the stools along with our island in the middle of the kitchen. Mom was almost down with cooking food, she turned away from the stove, filling four plates with food.

"Oh, Good morning Hayley, I didn't know you were awake yet, but I made you a plate already."

"Thanks mom and Good morning"

"Morning Hayley" McKayla and Erica said in unison.

I replied with a 'Good Morning'

"Mmmmmm Breakfast was good mommy thank you!" McKayla  said

"Yeah mom" Me and Erica said.

"Well I'm glad you girls liked it" my mom was a pretty good cook. I don't think I would ever eat better food than my own mom's.

When Erica and McKayla exited the room to enter the living room, I asked my mom "So do they know" I asked her this because since they are young Erica being 13 and McKayla being 7.

"About us moving?" my mom questioned

"Yeah" I assured her thought i was talking about the move

"Well, I was planning on telling them today after breakfast"

"Oh ok"

I saw my mom enter the living room, and I followed. She was going to tell them. I was thinking that McKayla would be uber-excited for the move and Erica, well I'm not sure with her age, 13, she might take it really well or she might just hate my mom for so-called 'ruining her life'.

"Hey girls, I have something to tell you two,"

"Mmmmhhmmm" Erica said nodding, wanting to know what mom had to say.

"Well, honey, we're moving" she said worryingly, unsure of their responses

"Oh really?Wow, this is soo amazing!!!" McKayla said jumping up and down. I chuckled at that, she always has so much enery in her. Her facial expression was so excited. It was too cute and funny.

"Oh where?" Erica said with a pretty calm look on her face. I guess she took it like me. Well alot of people say that she is alot like me. Well I like that.

"Franklin, Tennessee" I answered Erica for my mom.

"Oh cool! where is that?"

"Ummm" I didin't know the answer to that so I might-aswell have my mom answer.

"You know nashville?" mom said

"Yeah" Erica said

"Its near there"

"Oh cool"

"Why are we moving mommy?" McKayla asked still jumping up and down.

"Because I thought it would be a good time for a good change" mom said

"Oh ok" we all knew she was talking about the divorce and dad moving somewhere else in Meridan. My parents got divorced because my dad and mom really weren't spending time together that much and the love just faded, and so my dad moved out I remember that night so vividly......

{Flashback}

I heard my parents talking, usually I heard them fight over my earphones, but this time it was different, it was a different conversation. They were downstairs in the kitchen, I got up from my bed and sat on the stairs where they couldn't see. Something was wrong, I felt it. I got close enough where I could hear them, hopefully Erica and McKayla didn't hear.

"Laura, I don't know whats going on, it's just we always fight all the time"

"I know John, it's just we never spend time together, I guess the stress of life has really gotten to us"

"But remember when we said we wouldn't let anything get in the way of our love?"

"I remember but it seems like you just can't keep that promise, and to add to that you've been staying awfully late at work lately, I thought you wanted to spend time with your family and instead you decided to work overtime, are you not enjoying the life you have with me, with us"

Mom must've been referring to Erica, McKayla and I.

"I do it's just,"

"Just what, John?!, You've made not atempt to have time with us, you even cancelled our annual vacation this year because you had to work overtime! Is there someone else John?!"

"Oh, so your accusing me of haviing an affair"

"John, just answer me truthfully please"

"I'm not having an affair if that's what you believe because I'm not,I just need to get away, nothing is fun anymore, I come home and all you do is this"

"And what is this?"

"This, what you're doing now, accusing me, like you have no trust in me, you complain to me all the time, can't you just keep it to yourself?"

"Well, I'm not the one causing me to have no trust, it's your fault that I can't trust you! and it would be nice to have someone to talk too once in a while!, and John I'm sorry that life can't be fun for you, your family obviously isn't enough"

"I'm sorry Laura, but this isn't just working out for me"

"So now your giving up? we can't try to get through this like we have before?"

Tears were now streaming down my face, I couldn't handle this, but I needed to know what was going to happen.

"I'm not giving up, Laura, it's just we've tried so hard to make our marriage work and its still not working, theres a time where you just can't take it anymore, we're going nowhere"

I heard my mom sigh and start to sob.

"Laura, I'm sorry, but I have to go"

When I heard my dad say that, I started crying uncontrollably, it was too much to handle. I stayed on the stairs forgetting that my parents might see me. My dad's footsteps came closer and he was shocked to see me on the stairs, he walked up to me and gave me a huge hug, and sighed and said,

"I love you Hayley, and I'll never leave you I'll be right with you, I'm sorry I couldn't make mom and I's relationship work"

Through my tears I managed to say,"Daddy, please don't leave I love you too"

"Honey, I just need a vacation for a while"

Even though I knew he was lying I knew he wouldn't come back, I had try to believe him, maybe he would visit us.

With that we stopped hugging and he went all the way up the stairs and stayed up there for what seemed like 30 minutes or so while i lingered on the stairs. He then came downstairs with a suitcase and tears on his face. I guess he was saying goodbye to my sisters.

"Good bye Hayley, I love you, and I promise to call you everynight to say goodnight, like I always do and always will and if there are any problems call me" with that last sentence he gave me a phone, on top of the cell phone I already have.

"I promise dad"

With that, I watched my daddy walk out of our white door for the last time.

{Flashback}

I shook the thought away from my head, before I started to cry, this was a happy time. Everytime I thought about that night, I thought that constant thought I always have in my head but this memory always brought it back stronger, it makes me think 'What am I missing in my life?'. My dad did keep his promises he did call me every night to say goodnight, it was our special thing we did together and it was fun.

I ran upstairs and called my dad to tell him the news, I wondered how he was going to take it.

---

 

 Even I wonder how he's going to take it....haha

Well I'm not sure where this story will go I like it and I think I'll keep it as a Fanfic......So after I post chapters 5&6 of Where the Lines Overlap, I think it will go on HIATUS sad to say, for some readers, but I have huge writer's block due to my new ideas in my head like this one. I might continue Where the Lines Overlap after a few stories but I can't promise that. Sorry for my WTLO readers but chapters 5&6 will be up soon and so will chapter two of this. Yeah I remember I said I'd let you decide, but I'm not so sure anymore but you still have the right to comment if I should make this a fanfic.......YOU DECIDE(even though my thoughts overide yours, I think you'll want me to continue it cause I want to too)-haha you said tutu- <-- thats soo lame

<3erinn!!

---

 

 

hi guys......

well good news, my laptop is fixed and i can now go on buzznet again!! yay

anyways, i'm  not feeling really good....not like throwing up or anything, but there are things going on in life, ya know? and its kinda hard to handle and its like theres too much on plate. i hope you guys understand.

but.....i want to update WTLO so badly, i have chapter five and six written already, i just don't know if its good enough, like if my readers like it or not. i feel there aren't any readers, but then when i say that i feel like the readers i have are offended, well for those who are offended i'm not trying to make you feel offended......well just to let you know i feel bad for leaving you guys hanging, cause i know what it feels like and if you guys really like my stories i really need to know........do you like my story i have? should i continue it? i have no comments..... i would really like to have some more comments than nwhat i already have, well i need to know guys do you want me to continue it? and if you do want me to i promise that chapters 5&6 will be up THIS WEEK!!! i promise!!! and i won't be a let down. and i think even if you don't want me to continue it i will update 5&6, because i spent time writting them and i didn't write them to not be useful, and i think if i update people will appreaciate my writting more :)....so yeah.......

UPDATING CHAPTERS 5 AND 6 THIS WEEK!!!!, (probably in the middle or end of the week, maybe tomorrow)

<3erinn!!

Chapter 4
Open your eyes, like I opened mine. It's only the real world, life you will never know.

(Josh)

"Josh!' Hayley yelled banging her fist on the door, I ignored her and turned my amp up louder - but she was a singer! Her voice matched my music perfectly. I turned it up louder.

I'd been up her for a long while. At first Hayley had tried to sit it out - wait for me to come back down so she could ambush me. I didn't succumb.

Then she tried the "I'm-not-the-bad-guy-I-didn't-mean-to-swear-at-my-best-friend" routine outside my door. After about ten minutes, she gave up and went back down stairs.

She tried to sit it out again - coming to the conclusion that I couldn't stay up here forever. She was mistaken again. I had an en-suite bathroom and a rather large supply of chocolate bars and lollypops. I devoured most of my lollypops there and then.

After she caved in on waiting, we can to where we were then. She was frustratingly slamming her fist on my door without holding back. My parents were going to be back soon - and they didn't like Hayley one bit.

I know, I know. This was pretty out of hand for this one word that she called me. It's just that, the whole time Hayley and I had known each other - we'd never had a fight where either of has had called each other something worse that a dweeb. Also - as childish as it sounded, I wanted attention. Hayley hadn't so much as hung out with my since she started dating Chad. She should feel guilty.

'Josh!' her voice was wavering and despite my anger, my stubbornness took a long fall. My heart dropped for me. I clicked the door open and she almost fell through into my arms. She looked so tired, but so surprised.

'J-Josh?' she said tentatively, 'you let me in?'

'No shit Sherlock,' I answered.

'Was it the "this isn't my fault" stuff, or the "you're being unreasonable" bit?' she asked, her cheeky smile back on her face.

I kept my straight face. 'I couldn't be bothered to drown you out much longer,' I lied tonelessly. Her face fell.

'Oh,' she looked miserable. 'Oh right, that's okay. Fair enough,' my heart was tearing but I didn't want to give in to her.

There was silence for a second. 'I-I just wanted to say I'm sorry,' even in this thick atmosphere she dared slip her tiny hand in mine. I didn't pull away, and this inspired her to go on.

'I didn't mean to call you a ... twat,' she said sincerely, squeezing my hand tight. 'I really didn't ... it just came out ...'

'Mm,' I frowned because I wanted to jump with joy. She was finally speaking without the mention of Chad.

'Please forgive me,' she moved closer, she was on her tiptoes so that her face was inches from mine. Each of her hands were neatly folded into each of mine, which she rested at my hips. I almost shivered.

'I-I forgive you.' Her face brightened. Shit. She'd dazzled me again - like she always did. Tongue-tying me and forcing me to her will. I hated it and she didn't even know.

'Oh Josh,' I was still stiff and she pulled in for one of her warmest hugs, but as she buried her head in my chest, my iciness melted until my arms were enclosing her in.

'I can't stand it when you don't speak to me,' she mumbled into my chest. 'These past couple'a hours have seemed like days.'

'I'm sorry,' I murmured into her hair. I really was - no matter how reluctant I felt towards feeling sorry, I knew myself and I knew that I was very sorry. I don't know whether she even heard.

'It's just ... I know that you don't like Chad,' shit, even his name made me furious. I held Hayley a little tighter.

'You're right, I don't,' I agreed frostily.

'And you're within your rights to dislike him, because every time he's around you he seems to act horrible, b-but he's not like that usually I promise,' she was babbling now. She'd pulled away - though my arms were still wrapped tightly around her shoulders. She was using that looking-me-in-the-eye-earnestly technique.

'Then why does he act like a dick around me!' I spat, pulling away from her. 'Honestly, Hayles. All he ever does is make snide little comments about me and your sex life -'

She had gone bright red by now, as red as her hair. It would have been almost amusing had I not been fuming. 'I-I-I swear I - we haven't. I-I -'

'Sure, whatever,' I interrupted impatiently. 'I don't care Hayley,' lies, 'it doesn't stop these comments -'

'Why should they bother you if you don't care?' she asked, frowning at me. I gaped like a fish at her, trying to think of something to say.

'W-well, I-I think that it's incredibly degrading for you,' I babbled, 'and I don't want to hear about my best friend doing - whatever,' I shook my head to get rid of these images I hated so much, 'with that jerk.'

She just looked at me for a moment - all wide-eyed. 'Oh Josh,' she looked kinda upset for second before recovering. 'Could you not try to get on with him?'

'No,' I said stubbornly, 'he's not making it easy for me, Hayles.'

'H-he's jealous of you, okay?' she shouted, suddenly irritable. I froze.

'Jealous of me?' I repeated incredulously, Hayley looked surprised that I was surprised.

'Obviously,' she folded her arms coldly. 'You're with me all the time, Josh -'

'Not anymore,' I muttered. She ignored me.

'He thinks you like me. He thinks that -' she took a breath and looked kind of uncomfortable. 'He thinks that we're secretly together behind his back.'

'W-what?' I exclaimed, taken-aback but not as entirely disgusted as I should've been. My heart was resting in my throat.

'You heard,' she muttered, her cheeks still as red.

'How can he think that?' I was talking to myself rather than her. She shrugged anyway.

'I don't know,' she frowned, 'but please consider that next time you see him.'

'Yeah, yeah,' now I knew, I was gonna live it up. I think Hayley saw this.

'Please, Josh,' she gripped me via my t-shirt. She was so close, I could smell her sweet breath.

That sweet breath almost knocked me off my feet. Dazed, I answered 'y-yeah, I said yeah.'

'Good,' she let go. 'I'll ... I'll speak to Chad,' she looked as if she wasn't looking forward to this prospect.

I enclosed my hands around her tiny hands and pulled her closer, maybe a little forcefully.

'How can you have a boyfriend who you're too scared to talk to?' I whispered and she blushed.

'I'm not scared!' she argued feebly but we both knew that she was lying.

'Fine,' I pulled away. 'Whatever you say.'

From the look she gave me I thought she was going to slap me. Instead she hugged me tight. I inhaled the scent of hair and knotted it softly in my fingers, holding her head against my chest. She sighed.

'I miss you, Josh,' she murmured.

'I haven't been anywhere,' I answered, feeling rather stupid.

'I have,' she sighed again, 'you're right. I've barely spent any time with you guys since Chad and I ... well, today was the first time in a long while. I miss you. All of you.'

'We miss you too,' I was mostly speaking for myself.

'Would you get totally annoyed with me if I suggested that we did this more often?' she asked tentatively. 'Like we used to.'

I laughed. 'I could never get annoyed with you,' I lightly brushed my lips across the crown of her head She seemed surprised, and I was more surprised at this action, myself. She didn't pull away. I didn't either.

'I'll try to get on with Chad,' I found myself promising. 'I'll try real hard, Hayles. For you.'

'Thanks,' she mumbled into my chest, shivers down my spine.

Was this normal friend behaviour? I pondered as I ran my forefinger across the outline of her face. Sure, I was thinking like a girl, but this certainly how I was acting - or feeling last week. Maybe I felt like this then - maybe I just didn't notice.

'You're mum and dad are back soon,' she reminded me in hushed tones.

'So?' I murmured into her hair.

'They hate me. Remember?' she rolled her eyes and broke away.

'Oh that,' I grinned. 'C'mon Hayles, they can't hate you that much.'

'They hate me as much as my parents hate you,' she answered and I paused. Okay, they hated me.

'They hate me so much more than mine hate you,' I assured her. 'Remember that incident with the lawnmower and your Dad's sweater?'

'Yeah, yeah I remember,' Hayley laughed, flopping onto my bed for a second. I collapsed next to her. 'He wasn't really mad about that. It was an excuse.'

'For what?' I frowned and she closed her eyes, as if in pain.

'He thought you were screwing me,' she said it quickly as if that would deduct from the obvious disapproval she felt. 'Remember that time he caught you in my room? Well, that sparked it.'

I laughed, though I knew I shouldn't. He had been so mad and he obviously still was.

***

I was as wet as I'd ever been before as I banged my fist on Hayley's front door. Rain plastered my dark fringe to my forehead and I fought to see through the rain.

She looked as perfect yet mismatched as normal. Though looking surprised she stood aside to let me in.

'Can I dry off here?' I asked, grinning, she rolled her eyes and gave me a small shove in the shoulder. She withdrew her hand which was now as sopping wet as my t-shirt.

'Give me that,' she said briskly, holding her hand out. I gaped at her.

'Give you what?' I asked stupidly.

'That t-shirt, dipshit,' she laughed as I glanced around nervously.

'B-but your folks -' I started.

'- Are out,' she finished, 'give it here and I'll stick it in the tumble-dryer. It won't take long.'

So without another word I pulled my shirt off and threw it to her. 'Can I have a go of your new guitar?' I asked.

'It's in my room,' she grinned, 'I'll be up in a sec.'

***

It's pretty obvious what happened there on. Hayley mom and dad came home earlier than expected to find me in Hayley's room. With Hayley.

And they never trusted me since.

I didn't mind, though. I suppose I was kinda nonplussed by the whole situation. It didn't have an impact on my relationship with Hayley. It made it stronger, even.

I grinned at her.

'Look, maybe we could go out for coffee tomorrow,' she suggested. 'I'm seeing -' her face darkened at my look, 'I'm seeing Chad, but I can meet you at one o'clock.'

'Sure,' I forced myself to smile, 'Starbucks at one it is.'

No matter how hard I tried to be fair towards Chad, I couldn't. I wouldn't. Hayley ... loved him but I sure as hell didn't.

Chapter 3
Just take it back, these words and hold our breath. Forget the things we swore, we meant

 (Josh)

We practiced without Hayley for hours after that - and it was fun. We practiced for while, before making up some music for this song I wrote. It didn't have a name yet.

'One last run-through?' I suggested and the guys groaned. 'What?' I asked defensively.

'We've been practicing for ages,' Zac moaned. 'Can't we just ... get a takeaway or something?'

We all laughed. It was all about food with Zac.

'Sure,' I switched my amp off and pulled my guitar off.

'You order,' Taylor threw his cell to Jeremy. Jeremy paused.

'Shall I order for Hayley?' he asked tentatively. 'She'll be back soon.'

'No,' I said automatically, 'she's had dinner with Chad-no-balls.'

The guys laughed appreciatively as Jeremy stabbed the nearest Chinese number into his cell. 'Yo,' he said, 'yeah, can we have ... chips,' we laughed again, 'yeah, and that too.'

As Jeremy made a fool of himself out to the guy working at the shop, Zac, Taylor and I packed up our guitars and Jeremy's bass.

'I wonder what Hayley sees in him,' Taylor muttered.

'Sees in who?' I forced myself to reply though I knew perfectly well who.

'In Chad-no-balls,' Zac piped up, giggling. 'I gotta hand it to you, Josh. That was good.'

I inclined my head to show my thanks. I lugged my guitar to a corner of the room and waited for Jeremy to hang up.

'You're picking it up in ten minutes,' he shoved his cell in his pocket.

'Why do I have to do it?' I moaned.

'Cos I ordered,' he said, finality in his voice. 'Think of the exercise.'

I shot him a sarcastic glance, but I didn't argue. I really couldn't be bothered.

 

***

I was strolling through our street, my hands in my black Jack-the-skeleton jacket pockets. It was pretty cold out today, I granted that. I didn't care, though. That stubborn ice felt colder.

Pushing this thought that provoked another thought that included Hayley to the back of my mind, I pushed open the chip shop door.

'Jeremy Davis?' I called to the guy behind the counter.

'Another coupla minutes, mister,' the guy called back. I sighed and slumped into a plastic seat which was, admittedly, not as comfy as my amp.

You know the feeling, when you know something's wrong inside your own head, but you can't quite put your finger on it. I felt like that. When I didn't speak, when I was on my own, inside my mind I felt scared. I felt like cold. I felt like I'd always be alone.

I didn't like it one bit.

It was a new feeling which was unwanted. I gripped the plastic chair handle hard as I tried my best to push it away, but it wasn't working ... and I was such an expert.

'Excuse me mister, could you not break that chair?' called a voice. Initially I thought it was the guy behind the counter, but the voice wasn't male. It was a female - with a cute little accent on her, British I think. Somewhere in Britain anyway. I released the chair handle, opened my eyes and looked up.

She had a pretty face to match that voice. She had long flowing blonde locks that was tied back in a tight ponytail, and a little smile with large brown eyes with long lashes to match. She smiled prettily.

'Is everything alright Jeremy?' she asked.

Jeremy? I remembered my order name and understood. 'Y-yeah, fine,' I answered. 'I-I'm fine.'

'Want some company?' she asked, glancing at the guy behind the desk. 'I'm due a break.'

I paused with a smile frozen on my face. 'Um, sure,' I answered stiffly, 'pull up a seat.'

She collapsed into a chair beside me giving a sigh. 'We've been rushed off our feet all morning,' she explained as I raised my eyebrow. 'I spose it's a good thing if you're thinking about money.'

I chuckled politely. 'True,' I answered. We fell into silence.

'I'm Janet,' she introduced herself, 'Janet Davis. I think we share a surname,' she laughed.

I laughed too but in my head I was thinking no we don't. I dunno why I didn't bother to correct her. I couldn't be bothered.

We fell back into silence. After a second she spoke again. I sighed. She seemed to be one of those girls who couldn't just sit.

'You don't make it easy for someone to be nice,' her eyebrows were raised. 'Your clenching that chair handle again.'

'Oops, sorry,' I let go like it was on fire. I contented to letting my hand lie on my lap.

'Want to talk about it?' she seemed pretty concerned but I had nothing to talk about.

'No,' I told her stubbornly.

Silence.

'You know, eating all that to yourself will make you fat,' she said matter-of-factly. I scoffed.

'It's not all for me!'

'Sure, sure,' she held her hands up, 'but when you get home and you're all alone, and it's just you and the food ... you'll be saying different.'

'I'm not on my own.'

'Ah,' she smiled, 'you've got a girlfriend to help you with the calories?'

'No!' I couldn't help but laugh at this girl. 'Friends, actually.'

'Sure, sure!' she laughed and got to her feet. 'Anyway, I've gotta go back to work. Anytime you want to ... talk, I'll be here. Nice meeting you Jeremy.'

She got up and headed back behind the counter. I shrugged to myself slightly. She had a pretty nice ass.

'Jeremy Davis,' called the guy. I got to my feet and took the stuff. Janet Davis was looking at me.

I forced a smile and turned my back on her. I just wanted to get back to the guys.

 

***

They were waiting and starving. Not even bothering with plates, we turned the TV on and pigged out on the sofa.

'We're not being greedy,' Zac dignified himself after dropping a large amount of tomato ketchup on his new white t-shirt. 'Being in a band is hard work.'

'Sure, Zac,' I patted him on the back, mid-chew of several chips. 'Sure.'

Zac shrugged it off and turned his attention back to the game. He wasn't good at multi-tasking.

'Nice chip-eating there,' Jeremy complimented me and I spluttered, half of the chips in my mouth ending up on Zac's lap.

'Hey!'

'Ha!'

In sync, we all spun our torsos around. In the doorway stood the ugliest sight that any of us could've expected, next to the most beautiful.

Chad and Hayley were back.

'Nice time, Hayles?' I asked, intentionally ignoring Chad.

'Er - great,' she looked as if she wanted to tell me off for being rude to Chad but she didn't. She wouldn't. Not to me.

She caught sight of the remenants of the chips I'd been eating on Zac's lap and burst into a fit of giggles.

'Something like this happens every time,' she giggled. 'Who was it this time?'

All fingers pointed to me. I pointed to Zac. 'Y'know he can't help himself,' I shrugged and we all laughed. It was good for a minute. Like Chad wasn't there - but he had to stick his oar in.

'Haha, that's so mature,' his voice was laced with sarcasm. 'Well done Josh. It was exactly what I expected of you.'

What a dick.

'Are you sure you want to stay with the immature and childish?' I answered coldly. 'Are you sure you don't want to leave? The rest of us want you to.'

'Josh!'

'You're right, I don't want to stay,' Chad smiled slimily. 'Bye Hayley,' he gave a long kiss. We all averted out eyes.

Before long I looked up and he'd managed to slip his slimy little tongue into her mouth and was using his washing-machine technique. Hayley moaned and I felt cold.

I coughed loudly and Hayley broke away, red in the face.

'Bye Chad,' she muttered.

'You guys be careful with her,' there was fake pleasantness in her voice. 'She's a delicate little thing. I should know,' that smile was back on his face - and I noticed how red Hayley's lips were. That was not from just now. I bet they'd gone way further out of sight.

As soon as he left, I think we all gave a sigh of relief. Mine was the loudest. 'Thank-friggin'-God!' I exclaimed shoving some chips in my mouth. 'Want some Hayles?'

'No, I'm okay,' she answered coldly. 'Josh, I'd really appreciate it if you didn't speak to my boyfriend like that.'

'He speaks to me in exactly the same way,' I swallowed my chips. 'Have you asked him to quit speaking to me like that?'

She hesitated. 'Yes,' she was so unsure, that made me sure she was lying.

'He's not doing a good job,' I assured her, 'you may want to try again.'

'Stop being a twat Josh!' she shouted, frustrated. I think we all just froze. She'd never swore at me before.

'I'm sorry Josh,' she said, but she held that determined face as best she could.

'No you're not,' I spat bitterly, getting to my feet. 'You never are, these days,' I turned to the guys, 'I'll be in my room if you want me.' I walked a couple of steps towards the stairs, and then headed back to get my chips. Once I had them, I was gone.

Screw Hayley. I didn't even care about her anymore. I didn't care about her stupid, shallow, slimy boyfriend either.

So why did it hurt so much?

Chapter 2

If you want to play it like a game, well c'mon, c'mon, let's play

 A/N I'm gonna double update to start 'cos the start's kinda slow, and please, please, PLEASE comment or 'friend' me or something!

(Josh)

Jeremy bought me Coffee and practically forced me to drink it. It felt odd as it run through my system. It felt like drinking something stronger, stickier, less drinkable.

My throat was dryer that it had ever been before. It was like I had my own private Sahara in there. I didn't want it, but I'd keep it against the anxiety in my stomach any day. It almost stung.

'Can we see her?' I asked Jeremy for approximately the thirty-seventh time in the past ten minutes. Jeremy sighed and crushed his plastic coffee cup in his hand.

'Fine!' He said hoarsely. 'Fine, let's go.'

We rushed out of the canteen in a second, we began at a fast walk and quickly picked up into a run. We practically sprinted through each corridor to Hayley's cubicle. I'd never run so fast in my life.

We burst into Hayley's cubicle, were she was sitting upright and wincing. Zac and Taylor sat at her bedside.

'Hayles?' I pushed my way through to her and gripped her fingers in my own. 'Hayles, are you alright?'

She gave me a sardonic look. 'Yes, I'm completely fine. My ankle doesn't hurt or anything.'

I winced and she did too. 'Sorry,' she muttered.

'S'okay,' I muttered back. I collapsed into the plastic hospital chair which wobbled dangerously.

There was silence for a couple of seconds. 'The doctor said my ankle isn't broken,' Hayley informed us tonelessly. 'He said it was just dislocated. It ... hurt, when he put it back into place, but he says it'll be back to normal soon. In a couple of months. I'll still be able to do that gig next week.'

'Whoa, hold up!' I interrupted frowning. 'You don't need to think like that. There's no point in doing the gig if you can't bounce around and be you -'

'So you're saying my voice isn't good enough?' she flared up suddenly.

'N-no!' I snapped back, 'no, I'm just saying that there's no point doing it if you don't feel comfortable.'

'I do feel comfortable,' she said, with a sort of finality in her voice. 'And we've been working towards that gig for ages. I'm not giving up now. We're doing it, okay?'

'Yeah, whatever,' I muttered, but inside, my heart was falling. Something was bound to go wrong. When Hayley was in this mood, something always went wrong.

'Sorry,' she muttered again, but she folded her arms resolutely. I looked up at her, right into her eyes. She wasn't sorry.

 

We got out of the hospital eventually. Hayley insisted on her mom not being called and - as usual - she got her way. 

Jeremy gave me quick look and a slap on the back before getting into his car. Zac and Taylor glanced at each other and slid into the backseat of Jeremy's car, laughing and joking. They shut the door.

Hayley looked at her feet awkwardly. 'Can I come with you?' she asked, her fingers reaching for mine.

'Sure,' I coughed nervously. 'Er - it's parked quite far out. I ran in.'

Hayley laughed, low and husky. 'I don't mind walking.'

'Good,' I grinned, 'Cos I'm not carrying you.'

Jeremy pulled out and grimaced. I laughed aloud as Taylor and Zac rocked out and bellowed in the back.

'He's gonna have hell with them,' I explained to Hayley as Jeremy drove away. 'I'll be surprised if he doesn't crash just to shut them up.'

Hayley laughed, low and husky, and we began to head towards my car.

'I'm sorry,' she said after a short silence, 'for snapping at you earlier.'

'I-It's fine!' I assured her, 'you were in pain. It's totally understandable.'

She shook her head, frowning. 'No it's not,' she disagreed. 'It was no reason to snap at you when you were only trying to help.

I shrugged and we fell back into silence. Hayley slipped her arm around my waist and wrapped mine around her shoulders. God, she was so tiny!

I was glad she was fine, though. Even though she had a pretty severe limp, it was going to wear of - and she wasn't in total pain. The ice in my heart had disappeared and I had no inclination on feeling it again anytime soon.

'I'm sorry!' I said suddenly, on impulse. She cocked her head and frowned at me in a surprised and confused way.

'What the hell for?' she asked.

'If I hadn't been chasing you down those stairs ...' I trailed off. I didn't want to say it.

She laughed. She actually laughed. 'Look Josh, I was going to tell the other's about your girlish scream,' she giggled. 'Besides, we were only messing around.'

'But it's my fault -'

'No it isn't, you didn't do anything,' she interrupted.

'Exactly,' I said miserable. 'I could've caught you. If only I hadn't hesitated.'

'Josh, quit being stupid,' she told me firmly. 'I know that if you'd realised what was happening sooner, you would've caught me but it's fine that you didn't. I'm fine.'

We fell back into that oh-so-awkward silence, and I was glad when we reached the car. Hayley head-banged and sang loudly to the heavy music we'd chosen. I sang with her as we cruised out of the hospital.

She leant up real close and sang loud in my ear. I grinned, unfazed.

'You do that every practice,' I yelled over the music. 'I'm used to it now, Hayles.'

'Damn!' she shouted, before continuing singing. I grinned at her for a moment, before returning my eyes to the road. I didn't want her to stop singing. Not now, not ever.

 

We arrived back at my place, and waiting outside - surprise, surprise - was the most unwelcome visitor there could've been.

Chad Gilbert.

'Oh God, Hayley!' he threw himself at her, the second she got out of the car. I could see her struggling under his weight. 'Oh Hayley, are you alright?'

'Does she look alright?' I snapped at him, 'and besides, you're not helping her. Her ankles sore as it is, she'll be off her feet if you carry on.'

Chad pulled away and glared at me. 'You can go now Farro,' he snapped. 'I can look after my girlfriend, thanks.'

'Yeah, sure looks like it!' I snapped back and he measured up against me. Sure he was tall, sure he was fat, but I'd take him any day. Any day.

'Guys, guys!' Hayley bellowed, pulling Chad away from me. 'D'you think I want you fighting? Do you think that I'd want to see my best friend and my boyfriend take punches at each other?'

'Sorry babe,' Chad sighed and pulled Hayley into a hug, shooting gloating daggers at me over her shoulder. 'Farro distracted me, that's all. You know what he's like.'

'Chad!' she snapped, pulling away from him to yell at him. I wouldn't know, I'd left by that point. I didn't see it.

I did see him lock lips with her though. I was standing at my door, watching them for a second. His tongue was already down her throat before she could say what she wanted to say.

And the worst thing was that she didn't even pull away.

I headed inside my house, slamming the door behind me, but I couldn't get those noises out of my head. His slurping ... that little moan she gave ...

I shuddered. I wouldn't think about it, I frowned deeply. I'd go down to the basement and practice the song with the guys while Hayley made out with that dick of a boyfriend she had. I didn't care.

'Where's Hayley?' was the first question tossed at me by each band member. It echoed several times in my head.

'She's outside with Chad,' I answered dully as I pulled my Les Paul on. 'He was sucking on his face last I saw.'

I saw Jeremy and Taylor exchange a glance. I chose to ignore it.

'Er - let's go through Emergency, shall we?' Taylor piped up nervously.

'Yeah, whatever,' I muttered, shoving the guitar lead into my guitar. It made a loud buzzing noises and everyone groaned.

'1, 2, 3, 4!' Zac shouted, slamming his drumsticks together and taking everyone by surprise. I'd always had quick reflexes, though. It came naturally when you lived with Zac. I struck my first  chord forcefully.

I hated Chad for treating my best friend like a washing machine, I bet his tongue technique was just the same. I hated Hayley for letting him.

I head-banged violently, then swinging my guitar around my back in a momentary pause. I sidled up beside Jeremy and head-banged in sync with him. He seemed surprised at first. Nowadays I didn't usually move a lot. I was usually on back-up vocals, but that ended now. Hayley could screw her back-up vocals. I was doing what I wanted from now on.

I spun around several times and held my guitar in midair, strumming towards Zac. I spun back so I was facing the front amp and head-banged once before I swapped strumming for complicated picking. In my sudden ferocious mood I swapped the usual simply picking solo, for a far more complicated one, improvised on the spot. I was pretty proud.

And then the music stopped. I was picking this oh-so-over-complicated solo on my own. I stopped and looked up.

Right at the bottom of the cellar steps stood Hayley with the most perfect, satisfied smile on her face. Right next to her stood Chad, with his usual expression of dull unawareness. What the hell was he doing here?

'Well done Farro,' he drawled, his eyes narrow and cold. They did not match his tone, and Hayley obviously didn't recognise this expression because she was beaming at his friendliness. It was a pity he had to go any ruin it.

'It was a lot better than your usual. It was actually half-decent this time.'

Hayley's smile slipped but she maintained it best she could. It didn't have that pleased glow it'd held before.

'Damn! Thanks Chad!' My voice was filled with sarcastic false friendliness. 'Maybe one day I'll be as good as your shitty guitar-playing.'

His own sarcastic smile faltered to a glower. 'Watch your lip kid!' He snapped and I snorted. Kid?

'If I'm a kid, what's Hayley?' I hissed. 'If I'm a kid, you've been making out with a kid?'

He took a step towards me and shoved me hard in my shoulder. 'Hayley's a lot more mature than you are, kid. Believe me. I know,' he smiled slimily. Dick.

'Chad!' Hayley's voice pierced that thick silence like a knife. She sounded appalled, and I felt appalled too. How dare Chad say that?

I shoved him back, only harder. 'Shut the hell up!' I hissed.

'Or what?' Chad hissed back.

'Or I'll make you,' my voice was no more than a whisper now. I sounded dead serious. 'I swear.'

Chad didn't reply, but his face was inches away from mine, his face was contorted in rage. Good.

'Guys!' Hayley moaned pathetically, giving Chad a tug back. 'Please. Chad, please come back,' she pleaded. 'For me?'

Chad didn't move one inch.

'Josh,' she was at my side now, and her limp was more pronounced than ever. Her hand found it's way to the crook of my arm and she tugged gently. 'Josh please. Please come back. For me.'

I hesitated. I didn't want to give in to Chad - but Hayley sounded so miserable. I hated the guy but she loved him. She didn't want to see me fight him.

I took a step back.

Chad's face swam gloatingly as I stepped away. I was filled with hate, but there was no stepping back now. I turned to face Hayley. She looked relieved.

'Thanks,' she murmured before standing back.

'C'mon, Hayley,' Chad said, grinning. 'I'm taking you out to dinner.'

'Chad, we've got practice,' she murmured.

His face fell into a pouty expression I suppose she found cute. 'Please,' he begged, taking her hand.

She sighed and turned to us. 'Is it okay if we call this a day?'

We all exchanged a glance that told each other that it was not okay.

'Yes. Fine,' Jeremy told her with a forced smile. 'Go on.'

She had a bright grin on her face now, and it was hard to glare at that. 'Thanks guys,' she gushed and Chad slipped his arm around her waist.

'Here, let me help you,' he shot a nasty grin at me. 'I'll see you guys around.'

The second that the cellar door was shut Zac hissed, 'bastard!'

'Language!' I muttered feebly but  I was in no mood to correct him today. I flung myself onto the amp. It was a pretty comfy seat.

'Why is she so blind?' Taylor exclaimed. 'He's not even cute.'

We all looked at him.

'C'mon, you can tell when a guy is attractive to a girl or not,' Taylor blushed. 'And he isn't, okay? I'm not gay.'

We laughed hoarsely, without humour. Hayley still wasn't here. Her bright, her husky laugh, it wasn't here. Chad had it.

And something about that made that ice return to my heart.

Chapter 1
I'm in the business of misery

A/N Can I just say that, before I start this story, I have never seen Chad Gilbert in my life? I don't know whether he's horrible or nice or anything; he's just a character. I'm sure he's a great guy, but this is my story and I'm just twisting things a bit :D All characters in this story are of my adaption and are not necessarily this way in real life.

That's the boring bit. Please give me feedback! This is the first story I've written that people can actually READ! :L I hope you like it :D

(Josh)

With eyes like sunsets, she sang her heart out. She sang with a voice that was so much more powerful than you expected from her little body. I admired her with such a powerful, unidentified emotion as I strummed hard on my brand-new Les Paul.

I tore my eyes away from her - and it felt so difficult, so wrong to look away from her. I strummed with twice as much venom as I turned and screamed these lyrics at Zac, my brother who was drumming with all his energy. I grinned at him for a moment, but I suddenly felt a rush of breath in my ear. I swung around and sang the lyrics at Hayley as she screamed them at me. Her face was inches away from mine and then ...

Bang.

Everything went black and all I could hear was Zac's frantic drumming and Hayley's loud, beautiful voice. Hayley stopped as the pitch black loomed on us. Zac, however, kept drumming nonetheless, as if hoping we were coming back in.

'Zac!' I bellowed, 'Zac, stop! Stop!

His drums faded to nothing.

'Must be the electric,' I thought aloud. 'I'll go check ...'

Taylor, the fuzzy-haired rhythm guitarist was wearing a grin, from what I could see in the gloom. 'Watch out for that killer nun, dude.'

'It was just a stupid horror movie!' I told him, though my heart had picked up it's rhythm. 'I'll be back in a sec.'

'I'll come with you,' I could feel Hayley's breath tickling my neck as she clutched my arm. She hadn't liked that horror movie either.

I couldn't help but grin. 'Sure?' I asked, 'I mean, that killer nun could just out there ... waiting for us ...'

'Shut up!' she shoved me. 'Let's just get on with it.'

The basement sure was creepy in the dark, but I tried to push this to the back of my mind. With Hayley clutching my arm so tight, I headed up the stone steps. It was a difficult process, granted. I would very much have liked to run up the steps and straight to the fuse box, but Hayley was not intent on moving that fast and I couldn't leave her behind.

'See that door,' I hissed as we were reaching the oak door that led out of the basement. I felt her nod once. 'She could be waiting just behind that. She'll have the rope ready, and the knife will already be bloodied because she doesn't like to wash it. She's just killed a couple of teenagers from the last house. Just like you and me ...' my voice was barely above a whisper right now.

'She wants to make it last though. Then she's going to tie our lifeless corpses above the door, just so the others can see us as they leave ...' I was really scaring myself now, so I decided to leave it at that. Hayley gave me a feeble punch in the gut.

'Shut up!' she hissed and I couldn't help but grin. She really was terrified.

We both were very wary opening the door. I opened it slowly, just in case, and though I was ready to make a dart for it, Hayley wasn't. Nothing was there, however. We were safe, and as I turned to head to the fuse box in the cupboard to the right ...

The figure was so tall, towering over both me and Hayley. It had to be seven foot at least, with a distorted blackened face that was blurred, so blurred ... just like that nun. It wore a long black hood that covered everything. It loomed over us hauntingly, with a cackling expression on the blurred face ...

And before I could register any of these, I screamed - real loud. Louder than even Hayley when she was in her most hyper state ... Hayley buried her head in my chest, shaking violently.

And then I saw something.

This was no killer Nun.

Oh shit.

Double shit.

I can't believe I screamed over the shadow of Zac's Lillo from Florida.

After what seemed a week of silence, but could only be just over a few seconds, Zac called, 'guys?'

I was in so much shock, I couldn't even answer him. 'Guys?' He called again, his voice scared and shaking now. 'Are you alright?'

'Fine,' Hayley called, and my head snapped to her. When had she taken her head from my chest? From what I could see, she had a teasing smile playing along her lips. God, this couldn't be gone.

'I-I'll just turn the electric back on,' I bowed my head as I pulled open the cupboard door with such force. Flicking a few switches, the lights flickered back on.

I forced myself to turn back to Hayley - who was now slowly shaking with uncontrollable laughter. Her face was red from where she'd been holding her breath, trying to stop it. She pushed her fiery red hair from her eyes as tears trickled down her cheeks.

'You screamed -' she giggled, clutching  her stomach.

'Yeah, yeah, I know,' I hated myself.

'You screamed -'

'Yeah, you said,' I glared at her.

'You screamed like -'

'YES, I KNOW! I SCREAMED!' I exclaimed. She was still giggling overpoweringly, but she took one deep breath and said what she had to say.

'You screamed like a girl,' she pointed out, before breaking down into heavier giggles. As embarrassed, and pissed off I felt with her I felt ... I had to admit, I loved her when she was in this state.

'C'mon,' I sighed, but I was grinning. 'We'd better get back to practice.'

She giggled again, 'yeah, right. I've gotta tell the guys!'

Before I could stop her, she sprinted down the steps. Yeah, now she wanted to run.

'Hayley!' I dashed after her, and to my advantage, my legs were longer than her little legs. I ran, taking two steps at a time. I reached to enclose her in my arms when ...

A scream pierced the air and everything slowed down in front of my eyes. Hayley had spared a second - just a second - to turn around and check how far behind her I was. There was the playfulness in her eyes that I loved so much, I got distracted ...

I didn't see her miss the last step. I didn't see her legs tangle hopelessly. I didn't even see the terror in her eyes until too late. She hit the ground harder than anything I'd ever seen. She made a clunk that echoed throughout the basement and my heart raised to my throat. No, not Hayley.

'Hayley!' I bellowed, and even my own voice seemed to have slowed down. 'Hayley, no,' I dropped to my knees beside, which wasn't really the best idea as my knees clicked painfully against the stone ground ... not that that was anything compared to what Hayley felt.

Her mouth formed an "O" shape, as if she were screaming but not sounded came out. Her eyes were clenched shut, almost as tight as her little fists. Her leg was curved in an odd shape. It didn't look good.

I felt the others crowd around her. 'W-what do we do?' Zac asked, sounding more scared than when the lights were off.

'Get her in my car,' Jeremy, our long-haired, usually fun-loving bassist decided urgently.

We all just looked at her for a second. None of us wanted to touch her.

'I'll do it,' Taylor said bravely but we all rushed in with hurried excuses. Taylor was the clumsiest out of the lot of us.

Hesitantly, I scooped Hayley into my arms and this time she bellowed and sound actually came out. I almost dropped her out of surprise.

Up until then, I'd never heard Hayley swear that bad - and I'd known her for a while. Maybe she did really know all these swear words.

Jeremy had rushed ahead to get his car out ready, but Taylor and Zac lurked ahead, shooting nervous glances at us.

'Is she okay?' Taylor asked, Hayley's head was now lolling back but she still had the same expression of terrified pain on her face.

'How am I supposed to know?' I shouted angrily. 'Hurry up!'

I would've run flat out if I hadn't suspected it would hurt Hayley even more. I settled for a jog, as fast as I could with Hayley steady in my arms. Jeremy was tapping his fingers impatiently on the steering wheel as we settled Hayley in the backseat of the car.

'Zac can come with me,' Jeremy said, his voice shaky and fast. 'Josh, take Taylor in your car.'

'No!' I argued, 'I'm not leaving her.'

'Unless you want to squash in the back with her and put her in even more pain, I suggest you do what I say - and fast!' Jeremy snapped irritably.

I gave him one last glare and stormed to my car, parked in my drive. 'Get in!' I flung the door open for Taylor and ran to the driver's seat. Jeremy was already a fair while away, so I stepped on the gas and went.

I caught with Jeremy in no time, and felt furious he wasn't making any effort to drive fast, to put Hayley out of her pain. He shot me a glance in his mirror but gave me nothing more than that.

I honked the horn edgily but Jeremy didn't hurry. I slammed my fist against the car door and instantly regretted it as my fist began to throb painfully. I shook it, like trying to get away from the pain - not that it worked.

But then I became suddenly thankful of the pain, and slammed my fist against the door one more time to intensify it. I should feel pain - so much pain that I couldn't see, so much pain that I could feel anymore. It was my fault that Hayley was hurt. If I hadn't chased her ... oh, if I hadn't chased her she wouldn't be lying in the back of Jeremy's car, yowling in pain. I could hear her.

Guilt washed over me like the biggest wave. It filled my lungs in just a second. I was drowning in the guilt of Hayley's pain. I felt like my heart had iced over with this remorse - it had! I couldn't even feel it in my chest anymore. I just felt cold.

Hayley's scream pierced the air and the ice in my heart shattered, piercing it. This pain was more than I ever wanted to experience. Oh Hayley ...

Jeremy had sped up considerably by this point. He hated Hayley being in pain almost as much as I did. Almost.

The trip to A&E seemed the longest trip of my life - and for the whole time, my heart seemed to have frozen over and stopped beating. I didn't like it one bit.

I pulled up in the first spot I saw, which was pretty far away from the hospital entrance, but the car park was pretty full and I doubted I could find any spaces anywhere near the entrance. I sprinted as fast as I could, following Jeremy's car. I was barely aware of Taylor behind me.

'Hey - hey Josh, wait!' he shouted but I couldn't. I needed to run fast to keep up with Jeremy's car.

My heart was beating so fast that I half-expected it to escape from my chest. I wished it would stop - as opposed to two seconds ago where it had totally stopped and I'd wished for nothing more than it to restart.

Jeremy didn't even bother finding a space. He simply stopped right outside the hospital doors and flung his car door open. He headed to lift Hayley from the car seats she was laying across, but I beat him to it.

'Oh god!' I moaned as I carefully scooped into my arms. She gave a moan too, though hers was not out of guilt, more out of agony. 'Oh god, Hayley.'

'Let's just go,' Jeremy slammed the door shut. He threw his keys to Zac who incidentally dropped them. 'Park the car, Zac.'

Normally I would've protested. I would've told Jeremy that Zac was too young to drive, that right now, he could cause an accident. Jeremy would've laughed it off and told me that we were driving at that age, so why can't Zac? Right now, I didn't care. Hayley was limp in my arms, tears hanging limply in her frozen eyes. Oh Hayley.

'S-she's hurt!' I bellowed as we broke through the doors into A&E. In a flash, Doctors and more doctors and nurses flashed around us. Hayley was taken away from me, and I wanted to fight to be with her but I couldn't. I had no energy left.

'She's fine!' A doctor reassured me. 'She's fine ... you can go. Get something to eat or -'

'No!' I snarled but Jeremy gripped my arm tight and led me away from the scene where Hayley was yelling at some doctor who had touched her foot.

'Josh!' she yelled. 'Josh, don't leave me.'

'Hayley!' I shouted, trying to head back to her but Jeremy tugged a little harder and soon we were away.

'Let's just ... get a coffee or something,' he muttered, keeping a firm grip on my upper arm.

Oh Hayley. She was plastered into my mind. She was yelling, clutching at her ankle. Tears pricked at my eyes. Oh Hayley.

BUT.
First, I'm REALLY extremely sorry I haven't updated recently.
It's for a number of reasons, that all sound cliche but are actually real: school has been really stressful :(, I've been really busy with pre-Christmas things, I'm kind of having writer's block, I need inspiration although I'm getting it back I think :D.
So I'm really so very sorry.
Expect an update very soon, and we get out the 22nd for break, so I'll update over break.
Please, if you don't still hate me, just give me a day or two to get things settled out and I'll start updating again.

Much love;