#4 - Tomkat
I have always kind of suspected Tomkat was a sham marriage. You see Tom Cruise has always married women who are at the beginning of their career, and then “built” them up. It’s my theory that he is actually a closeted gay, and has these sham marriages to hide this fact. (Seriously Tom, come out of the closet, its much more fun). In return for helping them with their career, they pretend to be married to him. This is why Tom and Nic adopted! By Katie, everyone was getting suspicious, so Suri is either secretly adopted (look at the pregnancy photos! Katie’s belly is a weird shape that changed in every photo!) Or alternatively is a turkey baster baby. You can google that. Also, Tom is a weird scientologist who jumps on lounges and control’s Katie’s career and has starred in some really bad films this decade. (Please don’t sue me Tom) (Scientologists are into that kind of thing, I hear).
This reminds me of this time I was at a train station and people were handing out brochures for free IQ tests, and down the bottom in tiny print, it was at the Scientology HQ. Nice try guys. Wait, what were we talking about again?
Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/bambi2009/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
This reminds me of this time I was at a train station and people were handing out brochures for free IQ tests, and down the bottom in tiny print, it was at the Scientology HQ. Nice try guys. Wait, what were we talking about again?
Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/bambi2009/ / CC BY-NC-ND 2.0
