The 69 Eyes Blog and Journals

The bed creaked as the young girl shimmied off it. She blushed at the realization she was only in a thin white night gown without anything to wrap around herself but knew everyone was asleep. Sasha moved down the hallway trying to find something for her grumbling stomach. The house was gorgeous. It was decorated in an old Victorian style with deep colors that gave a very gothic vibe. The teen moved down the elegant marble stair case and took a left moving through another corridor. She hoped they wouldn't mind her finding something to eat, the soup they had given her was thoughtful but not enough to fill the void in her stomach. The floor creaked loudly making her gasp and breaking the calm of the silence. She looked around fearful she had stirred someone. She stood against the wall for a minute before walking towards where she thought a kitchen may be. The house was large and therefore was making it hard for her to reach a simple destination. She weaved through the maze of rooms until finally a kitchen was before her. The girl practically ran towards the fridge, throwing the door open and reaching in for whatever was in there. She grabbed some fruit and sat down on the floor taking large bites of the apple in her hand. The juices ran down her face leaving a sweet trail from her lips to her chin. Sasha wiped them away with her forearm. She licked her lips and set the core besides her now peeling the orange in her hands. It had been so long since she had the luxury of such foods. As she ate to her heart's desire guilt began to form. The two men had taken her into their home and here she was eating all the delicious things that had gotten. She sighed and put the other things away. The girl was full and now felt bad for eating n general. Quickly, the teen cleared her mess and any trace of her from the room, hoping the men wouldn't notice her presence in the room. She headed back in the direction she had come but instantly stopped when she heard a voice. It had been a while since she had seen the men. She had taken a nap before coming to find nourishment. Jussi suddenly rounded a corner and looked at the girl.

"You scared me." He stated not expecting to have seen anyone on his way. He was use to only having him and his friend in the house, not a little girl running around. "What were you doing down here? You shouldn't have left bed, you need your time to heal." He stated walking closer to her and noticing the way she stood in the sunlight that was being leaked in from the curtains. It hit her and made her nightgown transparent. Going against himself he scanned her figure memorizing every crevice and curve that the female had and growing interested in her. The man shook his head and sighed, "Come over here, I'll lead you back to your room. It's a big house and I don't want you to get lost in it." He explained.

"I'm sorry for leaving my bedroom; I just got hungry and wanted a snack. I took some fruit but I'll pay you back for it." The girl all but ranted not wanting anyone to scold her. The man chuckled and shook his head slightly at her. He knew she was from an impoverished family but what Jussi didn't know was how bad off they had actually been. He never knew someone so eager to eat and yet feeling sorry for the hunger that plagued their stomachs. He thought it was unfair for her to have to deal with.

"I assure you darling, you can eat as much food as you need or want and won't have to pay back any money for it.  You need food to live and neither Jyrki nor I would feel right taking money for substance so important to humans." He explained leading her up the marble stairs that she had made her way down only a short period of time before. "That's your room right there. If you need anything just yell out for me. I will only be downstairs and I'll be able to hear you, okay?' the girl nodded and began moving to her room. When she was about halfway there she turned around and saw the man still there.

"Jussi, do you think you could come and talk to me later on, if you're not busy that is? I get bored in there by myself." she explained to him. "That's why I didn't call for you in the first place. I didn't want to just lie around all day." The man chuckled at her and nodded his head, "Thank you." She stated giving him a smile. He watched the way her teeth glistened and how generally happy she appeared before the girl disappeared into her bedroom. He couldn't have been happier with Jyrki's find.

The silver moon lit up the night awakening all that were nocturnal and lighting up the pitch black sky. With the rising of the moon came the rising of the older man, Jyrki. He sat up in his large velvet black bed and stretched his arms upward. A strong hunger filled him but he pushed it down knowing he should check on his guest before going to feed. The man quickly got dressed in a red silk shirt and tight leather trousers. He pushed on a pair of dark sun glasses and pulled on black boots before exiting the room and strolling to Sasha's. Before he opened the door he stopped. The sound of laughter filled the room along with the voice of his friend. The men cracked open the door slightly and saw the two chatting away telling stories to each other and cracking up each other. They seemed totally unaware they were being watched. With the distraction his friend was causing he thought it would be good to leave now and get some form of nourishment. He carefully closed the door once more and moved quickly to leave. He stepped down the steps and moved through his home and into the kitchen where the old wooden door was. With caution he opened the ancient entry and headed down the crudely made stone steps. The sound of agony rose to meet his ears. He saw the cells were filled with various people; about six people were staggered about occupying one of the thirty cells of the dungeon. The man ran a finger over the cells causing the people to look up horrified at their lord. He sneered at them finding them filthy and unwilling to love, for each had done something that was wrong in his mind. Either they had taken the innocence of one to young or they had abandoned the good will that used to be so strong in mankind. Whatever they had done they would soon be paying the consequence for their crime. He stopped suddenly in front of a cell holding a man with deep black hair. He was responsible for brutally murdering a woman and her son just for the petty pocket book only holding twenty dollars and a wedding ring her dead husband had worked so hard to buy for her. This would be the man meeting his fate tonight. Jyrki grabbed a key that was connected to one of the many silver chains around his neck and fit it in the keyhole. The man looked up with a blank stare. He had seen others go before him and knew the fate that would be bestowed upon him for his heinous acts towards society. The man moved down to unchain him confusing the man, was he really going to be let free? His eyes met the sunglass covered ones of the man. With one hand Jyrki lifted him by the neck causing a muted scream to pass through his throat. He was soon pinned to the filthy stone wall of the cell with the teeth of the larger man on his neck.

"Let this be a lesson to you. In your next life do right and leave the innocent out of your destructive path." He hissed out letting his fangs sink into the soft spot of the man's neck. The man didn't have a chance. Slowly blood ran from his body into the wanting mouth of the vampire, filling him and killing his most deserving victim. As the man started dying he felt sorry for his crimes, maybe it was because he was being killed for them or maybe it was a general remorse for his wrong doings. Either way he was getting what he deserved. Jyrki dropped him to the floor knowing now he was gone from this world and traveling to whatever happened next. He wiped his mouth and licked his fangs clean of the man's blood. No longer did his hunger consume him. Without missing a beat he turned and headed back to see his guest and release Jussi from her so he could feed.

 The wind whispered through the black night sky creating a melody that caused the animals which inhabited during the day to fall into a steady slumber and awaken the nocturnal animals. The trees danced through the sky slapping each other and dancing to and fro, shaking the leafs that were a mixture of gold and ruby sending them tumbling towards the dirt of the ground. It was a chilly autumn, nearly winter, night with a frosty wind that nipped at noses. The forest was alive, despite the frigid weather and ready for any mischief that ventured through it.

A girl of about eighteen ventured down the muddy path, by her home, that lead into the beautiful ancient forest. She was looking for peace and a place to shed the tears that were on the verge of slipping from her eyes. Her mother had brought home yet another man from the city and he wasn't any better from any of the previous ones. This new man still drank heavily and treated her poor mother without the dignity or respect the woman deserved. The way he stared at the young teen, with hungry eyes that a predator has for prey was enough to drive her crazy. No man should be staring at her well being with her mama. The woman had seen her lover's eyes for her beautiful daughter and was revolted. Simple comments to the man lead to a vicious argument. When he lifted his hand and slapped the older female her young protector jumped in taking a fierce blow to the eye. The torment shifted from her mother to her. No matter how much her mother begged and pulled at him there was nothing that could be done. He finally stopped the kicking, punching, and screaming when her mother had picked up the phone to call the police. The damage had been done, though. The girl was bleeding and her face had been bruised fiercely but she wasn't done. She had brought herself to stand and hobbled to her room to escape the man. From under her covers she heard him apologize to her mother then the tears her mother was shedding followed by the 'it's okay, we all get angry'. It was all forgiven. This had proved to be too much for the teen for she had seen this happen a million times before. She had packed up some valuables, climbed out the window, and now was on her way to her freedom of the woods.

Trees watched the young girl walk down a path made a thousand years before, deep into the woods that held secrets that none had ever discovered. They shared their knowledge causing the news to go deeper and deeper into the oaks, ferns, pine, and various others. They told of a broken little youth who had tears so ready to fall but nowhere to fall too. They described her perfectly: a beauty that had been broken by torments from a beast. Though her face was swollen, cut, and bruised from the pounding it was evident she was far from unattractive. The trees had seen plenty of young girls come into the woods and not come out but this one wasn't brought in. this one had freely entered without any man to lead her or any friends to push her along. This one had come for a home; hers was taken from her and it was the trees jobs to find her a safe place. It was a job that would be taken very serious by them.

It was getting colder as the night dragged on. The teen wished she had worn more than a worn sweater or had brought heavier to wear. She sighed at her stupidity and wrapped her arms around herself rubbing her delicate hands over her arms to generate some warmth. A howling of a coyote broke the silence around the wood and caused her to gasp in surprise. A beautiful brown animal walked close to her circling her and sizing her up. The girl kept her head and didn't fear the creature at all. She bent down and let him sniff her to get a better sense of whom or what she was. Once he seemed too really feel comfortable around her the girl ran her fingers through the thick brown coat of his. The animal nuzzled her before taking off down the path. For some reason the girl figured it wise to follow him. She picked up the hem of her white long skirt and ran after him.

A steady beat of feet on dirt echoed through the forest letting anyone or anything the trees didn't tell about the new addition to the woodlands. Owls watched from the trees as this vision in white followed a coyote. One black bird swooped down flapping its wings as it set course to find someone who could help this lost girl find a safe place to stay. As the bird approached the person he trusted the most he stopped. He could tell them about this young beauty or he could give her a chance to discover and possibly have a safer stay in the forest. With a look at the person he flew away hoping that the young girl would be protected and be able to stay longer. It had been to long since a girl so fitting for a queen came here and he wouldn't let her leave so easily.

Water splashed as the coyote pranced on rocks coated with water. The blessing of water was something the girl couldn't let pass up. From running so much she was awful thirsty. She cupped her hands dipping them into the clear stream and drinking the water. After having a few gulps of the crisp, fresh brook she stood up once more. The coyote was drinking a little further downstream, lapping up big gulps of the drink the girl was growing tired and the pain of her beating mixed with the running was causing aches and pains that she hadn't expected. The coyote walked over to her trying to push her to move, he had sensed she wanted to stay here but knew it wasn't good. The girl wouldn't budge though. She placed her bag down by a cluster of rocks and laid down using it as a makeshift pillow. The coyote whined and looked at the trees for advice. They shimmered away and he knew that he couldn't get the girl to move. Instead of letting her stay alone in the cold woods he laid close to her keeping the girl warm with his fur and making sure she stayed safe from any lurking predators.

Night was beginning to end and nocturnal animals began finding their homes in tree and ground once more. The moon started falling from the sky and the sun was just waiting to break through the darkness. Crunching of feet on leaves instantly woke up the sleeping mammal that was protecting the girl and he growled at the approaching people. The one he was protecting didn't budge. She was exhausted and her body had literally given up on staying awake. A dark figure leaned down and stroked the girl's battered face watching her wince in her sleep from the discomfort it was causing her. The man's hand withdrew and he looked towards the fierce looking coyote. The look the animal got was enough to know his maiden was safe. A head nod sent the dog running off to go find his pack and rest without having to worry about protecting the girl. Strong arms lifted the girl up and held her close as a pair walked through the woods to a place of safety for some and hell for others.

"Is she still sleeping?" a deep voice asked. The girls eye brows wrinkled together in confusion as she opened up her eyes to discover she was sleeping in a large bed. She could have sworn that she had fallen asleep near a brook in the woods. She looked around and saw two men standing near her bed. Fear crossed her face and she shifted back in the bed grimacing and grabbing at her sides. They had been wrapped up and bandaged which lead her to believe a rib was broken or at least strained. A man stepped forward, "How are you feeling, darling?" he had an accent in his voice that she had never heard before, "I'm not going to harm you, my dear. I found you asleep in the woods looking like you had been heavily hurt and couldn't deny you a place to stay. I meant no harm." The girl bit her lip and gulped. The man by her bed was tall and pale, much like her own skin. His eyes were bright blue like sapphires, deep and gleaming. He wore his hair long, to about his middle back, and kept it dark like the night sky. He was tall, most likely one of the tallest men she had ever seen and dressed like he had money to spare. His body was covered with chains and rings that were all bedazzled with jewels she could never afford.

"You're probably creeping her out. You so seem to do that well. You should have just left her where she was and not have brought the girl here anyway." A man snapped from the corner. The girl looked over to see a tanner man with his arms crossed against his bare chest. He was well built with a body that most females would drool over. His eyes were grey and coldly staring at the girl as thought she had done something horrible. His hair was crazy sticking out in a thousand directions and tied with a bandana. He wore only tight black pants that accent everything and caused the girl to blush at how her eyes lingered a little too long. The man was giving her a cold look though he seemed curious about her as well as concerned, "Jyrki, she doesn't look like she wants to be here. Why don't you just patch her up some more and get her the fuck out of here?" he asked sending the girl looks. He acted like he couldn't stand her but yet his eyes didn't seem to want to leave her.

"Jussi, look how badly beaten she is. Would you want her to go back to a place like that?" there was silence before the other man just shook his head, "She will stay here for as long as she needs to or for as long as she wants. As long as she is a guest in this house you will act appropriately to that, do you understand?" the man called Jyrki sneered at his friend. He got another nod from his friends and then began to get calmer. He once more looked at the young girl who seemed to just want to disappear under the covers, "Darling, my name's Jyrki and this is my friend Jussi. We are here to help you and get back to as well as you can, okay?" the girl looked up and nodded at him grateful that everything seemed calmer now. "Now, darling, can you tell me your name and what happened to you?" he asked her.

"My name's Sasha Jade and I live well I lived just outside the woods in the field where all the flowers once were. My mother and I have been short on money since my father died so we usually go sell wildflowers in town, well the season is in. my mother has taken to spending money of liquor and has started meeting men once more. This is just the result of her new boyfriend." She stated seeming to be embarrassed that her family had problems and she was the one that had suffered the most from it, "If you want I can work for my keep here. I ran off after this happened and I can't go back. I can clean and cook and do all that needs to be done." She stated wanting to help out instead of just taking handouts from the men. Jyrki chuckled at the young girl.

"For now you must stay in bed until those rubs heel. You damaged them and your face needs to go down in swelling and bruising before I allow you to even think of doing any work. This will be your bedroom for as long as you stay with us and there is a bathroom attached if you need to use it. If you need anything we won't be too far away so just give a yell. I must go to bed, now. I have been up for ages. Good night, dearest." He picked up her hand and gave it a kiss before leaving the room. Once he was far enough away Jussi walked over to the girl and sat down in the chair besides her bed.

"Jyrki brought this soup up for you earlier. Maybe now you are more up to eating it?" he asked her handing her the bowl. She took it and began eating as though it was her last meal. "Whoa whoa whoa! Calm down, before you choke." The girl looked embarrassed as she set the now empty bowl on the night stand besides her. Jussi looked mind blown at it, "You really didn't give a sap story did you?" she shook her head no, "How old are you?" he asked her curious to see. She didn't look old enough to be out of her house but she wasn't as young as others.

"I'm eighteen as of last week. My birthday is the nineteenth of October." She explained to the man, "How old are you?" the man shrugged not wanting to answer that question at the moment in time. She looked a little embarrassed, "I'm sorry for asking. It wasn't my place." He shrugged at her and looked up to see her sea blue eyes staring at him, "Jussi, why don't you like me very much?" the man was shocked that she has asked him that after they had just met. He knew that he was being rude to her but he didn't get why she was strong enough to ask that. No one ever was blunt. His mouth hung open slightly still stunned. The girl wasn't ready to give up on it yet. She was patiently waiting for a reply to her question. He suddenly regained his senses and cleared his throat some.

"I do not hate you. I just don't know you well enough yet." The girl nodded her head and he could help but smirk at the way a strand of brown hair fell into her face. Without even thinking about it he pushed it behind her ear. As soon as he had done that they both stopped and gazed at each other. The man pulled back after a second, "I'm sorry, it was just a reaction." Now it was her turn to be silent. She had just met him but there was a connection there that she hadn't felt with anyone else. What the girl didn't know is he felt it too. "I must go to bed now. I'll see you later." He got up rushing out of the room. He hadn't felt this way in so long. He knew that his kind felt love suddenly but even for him this was too sudden. The way she had looked at him made him realize she felt it to. Was this how it was meant to be? He sighed slipping into bed and looking up at the ceiling. He couldn't believe that after just a second his life could change so greatly. He knew he wouldn't be letting Jyrki out alone for a while, who knew what he would bring home next time.

Characters:

SASHA JADE

JUSSI 69

JYRKI 69

HELLDONE 2009 PROGRAM

great way to keep up with the 2009 tour for the 69 eyes

It was the night of the presidents ball everyone who was everyone would be there.I did my best to cover up the black eye that covered my right eye.It had almost gone the brusing had turned yellow.I looked at the clock above the fire if I didn't leave now I would be late.
An hour later I was serving drinks in the big hall.The room was filled with the likes of poations to musicians from classical to rock stars.I walked around the room with a tray filled with champagne glasses filled to the brim.I smiled as I saw Eicca he knew my sister from school.He smiled saying " Hello " I just smiled back as he took two glasses from my tray handing one to his friend.I reconized him straight away.His name was Ville Valo and was one of the biggest musicians that came out of Finland.I circulated around the room with tray after tray of drinks smiling politely as people took their drinks.
It was the end of the night and I was leaving out the side door.Afew steps down the road and I heard Eicca shout." Hey Ant wait up we're going for some drinks want to come along ".I turned around to find him and a bunch of others standing there Ville was amoung them smoking on a cigarette.Not saying a thing I just nodded.
We ended up in a club that Eicca knew the owner of we sat at a table in the corner drinking white russians.Ville was sat two seats away from me every so often our eyes met and he smiled.I shyly smiled back.Time was getting on so I said bye to everyone and went home.
I got in and Beni was there waiting for me I wasn't expecting him to be there he was surposed to be away until later on in the week.He came up from behind pulling me with my hair." Where have you been " " Working " I cried.Pulling on my hair even tighter " You haven't been working until this time it's almost 3 in thefucking morning " He pushed me to the ground and kicked me over and over again and again.I laid there in a heap crying." Im sorry please stop".After what seemed like forever he left me.I picked myself up of the floor and climbed into bed alone Beni was watching tv.
The next day Beni bought me a bouquet of flowers he always did after he beat me.This had been goingon from almost the start of our realationship.We'd been going out for almost two years now.The only reason I stayed was because he scared me there was no love.My love for him died along time ago.Nobody knew that Beni was like towards me though I had a feeling my family knew something wasn't right.But Beni was such a charmer to outsiders.
Beni and I was at the gorcery store I was at the fish counter buying some tuna when Ville came and stood beside me." Hello again " he smiled." Hello " I smiled backing away.Ville watched me as I dissapeared around the corner." Who was that " Beni snarled." Nobody he was a guest at the ball I was working at the other week." Really " he snapped.I knew what was coming and tryed not to think about it.Sure enough when we got home we had a row.This time I escaped a beating only because Beni's friends came around for beers.After everyone went Beni came to bed passing out.I laid there thinking about where my life was going.Is this really it for me ?
It was the weekend Beni was away until Monday.We'd been working hard all week at different functions and some of us decided to go out and let our hair down.I didn't get out much unless I went out with Beni then I couldn't realax.
We went from bar to bar laughing and joking.We was in cobra and I was too busy laughing I wasn't looking where I was going and I bumped into the person standing infront of me knocking my drink all over their jacket." Oh god Im so sorry " I said rubbing where it had spilt with a tissue.
The man turned around he smied " It's fine dont worry about it " he said looking down with a grin on his face." Let me get you another drink " he said taking a now empty glass from my hand.He walked away five minutes later he was back." I belive you like white russains " Ville said handing me a glass." Thank you " I smiled.
We both rejoined our parties that we came with.Ville stood only feet away I found myself staring at him laughing and chatting to his friends.His girlfriend was stood close to him they looked happy.I was alittle sad by this as that's what I longed for someone to love me for me to love them back.

Chapter 21 On the road again.

'Baby.. Wake up! We have to be at Bazie in a hour!' Jyrki yelled to Dee from the kitchen. Dee opened her eyes and closed them again because of the bright light in the room, Jyrki had opened the curtains already. She turned on her side so she could look at the clock on the nightstand at the time, it said 7 am. 'Yeah.. he lost it again.' She said to herself and sat up straight in the bed and looked around the room, she spotted her suitcase already packed and Jyrki's  next to it with a backpack lying on top of it. She rubbed her eyes and pulled the covers of her legs and put them down next to the bed, she stretch and yawned while getting up walking out the bedroom towards the kitchen. Jyrki was already in there eating some breakfast while being fully dressed and looked up from his coffee cup towards Dee who was still half asleep walking over to the coffee machine. 'Sweetheart.. you got only a hour left to get ready you know that?' he asked her when she sat down next to him with her cup, looking extremely tired and her hair all messed up on her head. 'Yeah.. I know.. just give me a few okay.. and coffee.' Dee said to him with her raspy voice and pointed toward the coffee cup in front of her. 'did you already see I packed our stuff? I packed yours to hope you don't mind I have put some of your favourite clothes in there so.' He said to her and Dee held up a hand and looked at him. 'Babe.. it's okay thank you.. I'm sure it's fine now please give me those few minutes.' She said to him and he smiled and got up from his seat putting his cup and plate in the sink to clean them. Dee dropped her head on the table and started talking to herself, she finished her coffee and got up putting it in the sink and Jyrki cleaned it for her. She got into the bedroom and opened the closet, she pulled out a pair of light blue jeans her purple MCR shirt she got and her black 69 eyes hoodie and some underwear walking towards the bathroom locking the door. She got a quick shower completely waking up and dried her self and got her clothes on and applied some make-up. When she got out of the bathroom Jyrki was sitting on the couch waiting for her. 'I'm almost done and look darling we still have time left so don't look at me like that!' she said chuckling walking in the bedroom again to get a pair of her sneakers and put them on, she opened her suitcase just to check what he packed for her and was satisfied with what was in it. He did pack her favourite things since most of it were her own clothes and some of his pickings and he packed 3 pair of her sneakers and off course the boots and 3 pair of heels. She rolled her eyes at some things knowing he would go nuts if she wouldn't wear it and put some more things in it before closing it again. 'Okay we can go.. are you sure we have everything?' Dee asked him walking into the living room with her suitcase putting it next to his at the door. 'Yes we have everything I put all the important stuff in your bag so that we don't lose it. Ohh did you see I packed your messenger bag as well in your suitcase since I know you don't want to walk around all the time with your backpack.' Jyrki said to her giving her a kiss for the first time in the morning he kissed her like he had to wait forever for it and she smiled. 'Love thank you again.. now let's go please.' She said to him and he got the clue that he was being way to parent like on her. Ever since he asked her to marry him he had been acting like he had to do everything for her and take care of her a lot, Dee didn't mind it at first but it was getting very annoying now.

They got to Bazie's house and found everyone else was already there waiting for them. Dee got out of the car and walked over to Jo giving her a hug. 'Hey Dee.. so when did he tell you we are going back on tour again?' Jo joked and Dee rolled her eyes smiling. 'Ohh he remembered last night he had to tell me that... I mean I have been back for 2 weeks now and he still forgets to tell me things.. but he did say we would be back in Finland again for Christmas and new years and then continue the tour.. do you believe me when I tell you he still hasn't told his mom that we are engaged?' Dee said to Jo who shook her head chuckling. 'Damn fins! I guess they are all like that I mean Jussi told me 2 days ago we would leave on tour to America so.' Jo said to her and the girls both started laughing. 'Okay let's get going then.. Dee your riding with us.' Timo said to her and Dee smiled when Jyrki abruptly turned around with his eyes huge. 'Excuse me?? Why is she with you guys when she can ride with Bazie , Archzie and me?' Jyrki said to Timo and he grinned. 'Ask Jussi.. it was his idea to steal her away from you guys for the short trip to the airport.' Timo said and Jyrki looked at Jussi who smirked. Dee and Jo were still in between the cars looking back and forth holding in their laugh. 'Hmm like that huh?. Okay fine then Jo ride's with us.' Jyrki said to Jussi who now looked like he seen a ghost. 'Hmm don't you just love it to not have a opinion in this?' Dee said to Jo who chuckled. 'Ohh yes I adore it now don't I .. okay let's do this you sit with Jussi and I'll go sit with Jyrki.' Jo said to Dee and Dee agreed with both of them walking to the other car. 'See you at the airport love!' Dee yelled over to Jyrki when she got in the car and closed the door. Timo started the car with a huge grin and drove of with Bazie following him. Dee took a deep sigh and dropped her head on the backseat looking at the ceiling feeling kind of relieved for a moment. 'You guys are such kids sometimes.' Dee said sarcastic and both Jussi and Timo just laughed. At the airport everyone got out again and checked in with their bags. 'Which city are we going to first?' Jo asked Jussi who had his arm wrapped around her. 'Well first we are going to New York..' Jussi answered her and heard someone else jump up in excitement from her seat. 'Oh that's awesome New York I haven't been there in almost a year and a half or so.. I love that city.' Jo said to Jussi who had turned his attention away from Dee again and back to his Jo and smiled. 'Babe.. calm down... yes we are going to New York.. were you asleep when we checked in?' Jyrki asked her with a confused expression on his face. 'Uhh I guess I was.. oh my god I have to call Frankie!' Dee said while getting up and walking up and down the waiting area they were sitting to board the plain. She got out her phone and dialled Frank's number. 'Hmm I think it's best we don't tell her we are meeting up with Bam there to.' Jussi said to Jo and she chuckled. 'Ohh god no... it's not that she doesn't like him or anything like that she just doesn't like the effect he had on you guys just like me.' Jo said to him and Jussi grinned and got up since they got the call that they could board the plain. Dee put down her phone and walked over to Jyrki again getting her backpack and grabbed his hand towards the boarding. Once in the plain when they had all settled down Dee got out her phone again and started texting her brother that they were coming back to America for a tour. 'Love.. please put your phone away we are about to take of.' Jyrki said to her and took her phone from her hands, Dee looked next to her and then had enough of it. 'Jyrki Pekka-Emil Linnankivi! I love you to death but please stop it with the paternal behaviour it is driving me up a damn wall.. I know you want to take care of me and all but stop it your driving me insane!! I have had enough of it I am not a damn child and you are not my dad!!' Dee said to him getting her phone back and made everyone else look at them. 'Holy shit!' Timo whispered sitting next to Archzie who to was looking at them with disbelieve. 'Did she just?' Jussi started and Jo nodded. 'Ohh yes she just did she finally snapped at him for it.' Jo answered him. ' Rakkauteni I didn't mean it like that.. don't do that. And please put your phone away.' He said to her and Dee unlocked his seatbelt. 'Switch!' she said to him pointing to Bazie next to him. 'excuse me?? You want me to switch seats? Why?' he said to her grabbing his seatbelt again ready to click it back in place again. 'If you don't switch seats with B now.. I am getting out of the plain!' Dee said to him and looked at him still pointing towards Bazie's seat. 'Dee honey stop this.. your being childish.' Jyrki said to her and she unlocked her own seatbelt putting her things back in her backpack ready to get out of the plain. 'Okay.. fine!' he said to her and got up switching seats with Bazie. 'Wow' Jussi whispered to Jo who was still looking at Dee with huge eyes. 'She Is really and I mean really pissed off.. she indeed hates it when people go all parental on her.' Jo whispered back to Jussi. 'Jojo.. I can hear you for god sakes!! Stop it will you!' Dee said to her before putting her headphone on. Jyrki then turned in his seat towards Jo and Jussi. 'Okay what the hell did I do wrong this time?' Jyrki asked them and they both looked at him with a surprised look. 'Dude.. don't tell me you didn't know you acted like a dad on her all the time since she got back.. you always tell her what to do and what not to do.. I mean I bet you even packed her things this morning didn't you?' Jussi said to him having him think. After thinking for a while it clicked in his head he had been acting like a dad on her, being overprotecting and always telling her what to do. 'Perkele!! Why didn't you guys tell me I was doing that?' Jyrki asked them and Bazie answered him. 'We tried we seriously did but you were always to occupied telling her what to do that you didn't given us the chance for it.. it's okay you couldn't help it but I think she had enough of it now.. so please for her sake and our sake be yourself again we miss our old friend.' Bazie said to him and Jyrki smiled a little while looking at the back of the seat in front of him.

The airplane was to land in a hour the stewardess just called through the speakers. Jyrki had been talking to his band and Jo for most of the flight and was now woken up just like everyone else by the stewardess telling them that. When he glanced over to Dee he saw her still being asleep he woke up Bazie instead asking him to switch seats with him again. 'Bazie.. wake up.. dude is it okay if we switch seats again I  have to talk to her.' Jyrki said to him and he looked next to him finding Dee still asleep and agreed to switch, he got up and switched seats with Jyrki again clicking his seatbelt back in place and talked to Jussi next to him. 'Jyrki!! Are you going to wake her up?' Timo whispered over to him. 'Yes.. now If you don't mind and give me the chance to it.' Jyrki chuckled back and turned again towards Dee, he shook her gently waiting for her to open her eyes, when she did and saw that Jyrki was the one waking her she rolled them at him and pressed pause on her I-pod while taking her headphone of. 'What?' she said annoyed. 'Uhm.. just wanted to wake you up love and tell you we are almost near New York.' Jyrki started and took a little pause to think fast on what he wanted to say next. 'Is that all?' Dee said still being irritated and looking out the window instead of looking at him. 'Uh.. no.. I wanted to apologise for being such an ass.. I'm really sorry I didn't know I was doing that to you.' He said to her and made her turn her head and look at him. 'Ohh you were an ass alright a huge one... but it's okay.. I forgive you.. just try not to baby me that much please I am not a kid you know.' Dee said to him and he smiled being relieved she forgave him. Jyrki sat back looking at her while smiling a little and Dee rolled his eyes at him again. 'Ohh for the love of god.. seriously Jyrki! Get over here.' She said grabbing his collar pulling him close to kiss him. He pulled her closer to him giving completely into the kiss. 'Jyrki... jyr... Lo..ve..!' Dee tried while chuckling but he didn't stop. Finally Dee pulled herself lose from him and he was out of breath still trying to kiss her. 'Honey!! I'm serious.. people are watching stop it.' Dee said laughing hiding her head in her hoodie. Jyrki kept looking at her with intense eyes not completely satisfied yet. 'Babe!! Stop looking at me like that.. you know you can't eat me!! Stop being such a .. a .. such a.. VAMPIRE!' Dee said and he stopped bursting into laughter with her and so did everyone else. The airplane landed and Dee was non stop typing like mad on her phone while Jyrki had his arm wrapped around her shoulder when they walked to the end of the gate. 'Dude I don't want to sound mean but that was seriously disturbing up there!' Jo said to Dee and Dee looked up from her phone and laughed. 'I know.. it would have like only take seconds and the idiot over here would have drained me!' Dee said and the girls both laughed having Jyrki grin widely pulling Dee closer to his side. Once out the gate Dee's eyes searched all the people outside of it waiting for family members or friends. 'Who are you looking for?' Jo asked her and Dee turned around to all of them. 'Ohh no one particular.. uhm.. where can we pick up our bags?' Dee asked and then heard someone calling something very familiar to her. 'CUPCAKE!!' Frankie yelled and Dee turned around excited grabbing Jo's hand already. 'Whaaaaaaah!!! CUPCAKE!!' Dee yelled back and slipped away under Jyrki's arm pulling Jo lose from Jussi's hand with her towards Frank. 'What the hell?' Jussi said looking at his hand and then back up to see Jo and Dee both hugging some guys. 'Holy shit I didn't know you guys would be here!! Dee you kept this from me!!' Jo said while hugging Gerard. 'Hmm yes.. sorry Jojo.... Aww Frankie I missed you my little buddy!!' Dee said while hugging Frankie and jumping up and down. She let go of him and gave him a kiss on the lips that made the band look at her like what the fuck?. 'Ohh frankster you have to meet my fiancé.. come with me!' Dee said grabbing his hand pulling him with her towards Jyrki, Jo and Gerard followed chatting and Jo introduced Gerard to Jussi and the others. 'Whaah babe.. this is Frank my cupcake buddy for life and Frankie this is Jyrki my fiancé!' Dee said to both of them when they shook hands. 'Hey nice to meet you so you are the guy that stole her away before I could make a move.' Frank said sarcastic to Jyrki and he laughed. 'Yeah that's me.. nice to meet you to.. so I believe you are the one that got her back to me?' Jyrki said to him and he nodded yes. 'Ohh honey.. by the way what I wanted to uhh tell you Frankie is going to be uhm.. my best man.' Dee said to him while grinning. Jyrki laughed and shook his head. 'So I have to like choose a maid of honour for me then?' he said to her and Dee laughed. 'Ohh I don't mind wearing a dress if that's what it takes to be a maid of honour.' Frank answered and the 3 burst out into laughter. 'Uh.. Frankie I saw you in a dress once and believe me when I tell you I don't want to see that again as in ever!' Dee said and Frankie just grinned. They got to their luggage and loaded it all on trolley's towards the exit, Gerard and Frank held some taxi's for them and travelled with them to their hotel helping them carry some of their stuff. They all gathered later in the hotel bar for some drinks. 'So I believe you are a comic artist to?' Jyrki asked Gerard when they had all sat down for some food and drinks. 'Ohh yes... I am more into the superhero stuff but I made my own style I have weird characters.. so what is your style?' Gerard asked Jyrki and Dee already rolled her eyes. 'Ohh he brought his stuff with him so that he could show you that's what the big book over there is for.' Dee said to Gerard and he smiled having Jyrki showing him his drawings. Jo and Dee in the meantime kept themselves busy while looking for pranks to perform on the hotel staff together with frank and Jussi. 'Dude!! Is there a starbucks around here? I haven't had starbucks in like forever!' Dee asked Frank who smiled immediately he to shared the addiction of coffee. 'Hmm I think like 2 blocks away or something like it.. we can go there if you want?' Frank answered her and Dee smirked. 'Duh!! Let's go!' Dee said and got up from her seat already grabbing her coat and bag. 'wow!! Hold up! Where are you going?' Jyrki asked her while grabbing her arm he knew that when she wanted to go somewhere she would be out the door in seconds. 'We are going for coffee 2 blocks away we'll be right back.' Jussi answered him since Dee was to hyped up now babbling at Frank. Jyrki let go of her and Dee grabbed Frank's hand while hopping to the door. Jussi and Jo followed holding hands and Timo came along. Bazie , Archzie , Jyrki and Gerard stayed behind with Jyrki and Gerard talking about Jyrki's drawing style and Dee. 'Hmm I have got to ask you since I don't know Dee when she is not around me but is she always like that with frank?' Jyrki asked Gerard and he grinned. 'Ohh yeah they are always like that.. from the first moment they met 2 years ago they have been like that.. crazy kids.. but I share the same thing with Jo.' Gerard answered him and Jyrki smiled. 'Yeah but the kissing thing on the airport was a little weird to see to be honest.' Bazie answered Gerard and he laughed. 'Ohh yeah don't get me started over that I always thought it was weird but it's just the thing those 2 have... don't worry she does the same to me and Bob our new drummer really weird but hey who doesn't  think Dee is weird.. Jo isn't like that at all she is more the quieter type who keeps some things to herself.. but she is really cool she can party alright!' Gerard said and everyone laughed. 'Ohh yeah we had to get really used to Dee when she first showed up at our group. Since we were used to Jo we thought her best friend was like her but they are nothing a like.. like you said Jo is the more preserved type while Dee is like the rebel... but we still like them both obviously.. and well yeah Jyrki over here got so amazed by Dee the first second he saw her that he is getting married to her now.' Archzie said and everyone looked at him for being so open minded and then laughed because he was right. 'Oh yes don't get me started.. when I first saw her I went completely silent since I couldn't believe she was the same girl as the picture Jo had shown us from like 2.5 years ago.. ask Jussi he was standing next to me.. and then when I got to know her a little bit I liked everything about her.. her voice.. her laugh.. her smile.. I even liked it when she was totally into her music even if we were in the same space as she was.. and she Is very open minded she will tell you whatever she thinks about you or a subject even if you like it or not.. I think that Is really cool about her... and so when I realised that I could lose her I almost lost myself.. so when she got back to me I wasn't even having doubts about it that I wanted to marry her.' Jyrki said and Gerard smiled during the story since he knew how Dee was. 'COFFEEE!!' Dee yelled down the street when she and Frankie spotted starbucks, she pulled his arm and got in ordering a huge latte. 'Ohh do you think we should bring Gerard one to?? I mean the guy loves his coffee to you know.' Dee said to Frank and he agreed and they ordered a huge coffee for Gerard to. 'Jo babe are you sure you don't want anything? They got tea to you know.' Jussi said to Jo who was looking around the shop and then gave in and got herself a medium tea. 'Whaaah Dee they got cupcakes!! Should we get some?' Frank asked her while pointing to the cupcakes in the display. 'Well duh!! Just take the lot they have in there I bet everyone else would love one to.. ohh Jussi what kind of coffee did you get?' Dee said putting her attention back on Jussi and Jo. 'Espresso... can I taste your latte since I never had one before!.' Jussi asked Dee when they switched cups and tasted each others pickings. 'Ohh dude this one taste awesome.. next time I'm getting latte!' Jussi said when he tasted Dee's coffee Jo just shook her head and laughed at the 2 of them. 'Aww I loved your espresso.. ohh really? what a wonder that you survived it since there is like a ton of sugar in it!.' Dee said to Jussi when they switched cups again and walked out the store all holding a bag of cupcakes. 'Dee whatever you do don't start another cupcake fight please!.' Jo said to Dee warning her and Dee just looked innocently when they walked back into the hotel bar. They sat down with the others again and Frankie handed Gerard his coffee. 'Ohh awesome thanks... what's in the bags?' Gerard asked them and both Dee and Frankie already grinned at one another, Dee openend her bag and got out one of the cupcakes showing them to Gerard. 'Oh please don't tell me your having another fight again?? Since I won't be part of it this time!' Gerard chuckled and Dee shook her head into a no. 'Off course not Gee I wouldn't do that to you now would I?? nope these are for eating not throwing like the last time and besides Ray had started it then!.' Dee answered him and they laughed while the cupcake bags went around the table. Time to say goodnight to Frank and Gerard again, they were down in the lobby at the end of the stairs hugging them goodbye. 'Ohh you have to come see one of their shows!! You have to!! Please!! Frank.' Dee said to him looking at him with puppy eyes. 'Aww your mean you know that no man can resist those!! Okay I promise I'll come see the show tomorrow okay?' frank  said to her while she threw her arms around him hugging him. Jo gave Gerard a hug and said goodnight to him and then left with Jussi upstairs. 'Thank you Frankie prankie!! Love you!! Night cupcake!!' Dee said to Frankie when he walked out the door with Gerard towards a cab that would drive them back to New Jersey. They all got upstairs to their rooms and Jyrki invited Bazie, Archzie and Timo in for another drink before going to bed and to discuss the upcoming gig, Jo and Jussi were already at their room and had the do not disturb sign up on their door so they didn't bother to disturb them and invite them for another drink. Dee went into the bathroom to get changed into her pyjama's she didn't mind the others being in the room she would be going on tour with them in a bus for 2 weeks so they would see her anyway. She walked out of the bathroom wearing loose pyjama pants and a tank top, and sat on her side of the bed were Timo had half plunged himself down. 'Timo move a little will you.. your on my side of the bed.' Dee chuckled while he moved a little over so she could sit down. Jyrki , Bazie and Archzie were into conversation in Finnish since that was a lot easier for them to communicate with one another and Timo was keeping Dee busy talking to her about her friends. 'I like your pyjama pants by the way very cool with the skulls and bats on it.. besides I really liked your friends from MCR they are really cool.' Timo said to her and she smiled. 'aww thank you.. oh yeah they are awesome.. you should meet bob their new drummer he is so cute and sweet he rules.' Dee answered him and they both chatted some more until the others finally considered of talking English for Dee. There was a knock on the door and Dee looked at it surprised. 'Who the hell can that be.. don't worry I'll get it.' Dee said to Jyrki already getting up walking towards the door. When she opened the door she couldn't believe her eyes when she saw who was in front of it. 'UH HUH!!! Hello Helsinki Vampires!!' Bam shouted while walking in the room being followed by Ryan Dunn, Raab Himself and Dico. 'Niceee!!' both Bam and Raab said when they walked passed Dee and saw that she was in her pyjama's. 'Ohh for the love of god.. your kidding me right?' Dee said when they had walked in plunged themselves on the bed next to Timo and greeted their friends.                       

Chapter 20  Are you for real?

Everyone stared at Dee and Jyrki for the questions and the answers they heard. 'You will??' Jyrki asked Dee with a huge smile on his face. 'Hmm no I was joking.. of course I will you weird fin!!' Dee said while grinning reaching over to him to kiss him. She then continued eating her pizza not even knowing what Jyrki was doing next to her. It wasn't until Jo gasped and looked at Dee that she dropped her pizza again. 'Jojo?? You okay?' Dee asked her and looked at her with an eyebrow raised. 'Uh.. yeah I'm fine.' Jo said to her while letting her eyes move next to Dee. Dee followed her eyes and had them huge when she saw what Jo was looking at. 'You got me a ring already?! Ohh it's beautiful!!' Dee said to Jyrki when she saw that he had got down on one knee and was holding a little box with a engagement ring in it. He cleared his throat and winked at Dee. 'Now more official then if you don't mind... Daremo Elizabeth Christine Kraven will you marry me?' Jyrki asked her while taking her hand and the ring out of the box sliding it around her finger. 'Of course I will!!' Dee said to him hugging him so they both fell on the ground with Dee on top giggling and kissing him. 'So I guess you guys are engaged now or?' Bazie asked them while they all stared at the floor laughing. Dee sat  up straight still on top of Jyrki and glanced at her ring round her finger. 'yes we are most definitely engaged... ohh it's got a emerald stone on it awww I love it!' Dee said to Bazie and Jyrki when she found the emerald on it. Jyrki still lying on the floor started chuckling and tried to move Dee of him but she wouldn't move. 'It's your favourite stone so I got it for you and by the looks of things I am guessing you like it?' Jyrki said while trying to sit up a little. Dee noticed and moved of him and sat next to him on the floor still looking well more staring at her ring she loved every bit of it. It was a silver ring with a big emerald stone on it surrounded by little black sapphire stones. 'Oh My God !! congratulations then you 2 ohh Dee show me the ring!!' Jo said getting up from her seat sitting next to Dee who showed her the ring. 'Isn't it wonderful!' Dee said all giggly and happy half bouncing on the spot she was sitting. 'Ohh wow it looks amazing I mean wow!' Jo said to her and the girls both stared at the ring. 'I know right? It looks freaking huge like enormous!!' Dee said again and finally got up from the floor to sit back on her chair again. She showed the ring around the table and they all congratulated the 2. 'Ohh!!' Dee suddenly said getting her phone of the table which was charged and everything Jyrki kept it running when she was gone and flipped it open and stared typing like mad on it sending out messages to several people including Nightwish and MCR. 'Oh yeah typical Dee has to tell everyone she is engaged now.' Jo said laughing. Dee then picked up the phone stuck out her tongue at Jo and dialled a number, someone picked up and Dee started chatting excitedly in French. 'Ohh that's William she is talking to.. wonder how he reacts.' Jo said again following half of the conversation , in the meantime Jyrki received several messages that congratulated him including Nightwish , Bam Margera , Ville Valo and several more. 'Holy shit she texted all these people? I didn't know she owned al these numbers.' Jyrki said laughing texting thank you messages back. Dee hanged up the phone happy and dialled the next number which was Frankie's she promised him to tell him everything how it went. 'Who is she calling now?' Jussi asked. 'Ohh probably Frankie or someone else from MCR.. I bet she made them a promise so.' Jo answered once again while continued eating her food. 'Whaaah you would!!! Aww that is so awesome Frankie!! Thank you thank you thank you!!' Dee said happily and not long after she hung up the phone and joined everyone else again in dinner. 'What was that about?' Jo asked her. 'Ohh nothing... Frankie is doing me a huge favour that's all... ohh William is really happy for us.. his exact words were.. I can't wait for Jyr to be my brother in law... so he's cool with it.' Dee said to Jyrki and he wrapped an arm around her kissing her temple. 'Oh yeah before I forget Frankie just reminded me of it so.. I brought you gifts... they are in the bag over there.' Dee said to Jo and the others. Jo went right for it she knew MCR and the gifts the gave her last time, she opened the bag and nearly freaked out  of excitement. 'Oh my god!! Dude seriously??' Jo said to Dee who nodded and sat back lightening a cigarette. 'Yeah they just gave me all of it saying to give it to you and the guys well If the guys liked it.. dude you should see the shirt Gee gave to me it's fucking brilliant!' Dee said now getting up moving towards the bag getting out a purple shirt with a drawing on it of a graveyard and vampires, and another shirt a green one with the bride of Frankenstein on it. 'Ohh yeah Frankie gave me this so fucking awesome Gerard freaking drew them himself I never knew he was a artist I told him about Jyrki of course and he was excited and wanted to see some of his someday.' Dee said to Jo going through the huge bag she dragged with her filled with T-shirts and all other sort of merchandise form MCR. 'This Gerard guy he is a comic book artist to?' Jyrki asked Dee from the other side of the room. 'Yeah here catch!' Dee said to him while throwing over her shirts and some others that she got out of the bag. The guys all looked at the shirts and were impressed by the designs on it. 'wow they look cool can I have some?' Jussi asked Dee and she grinned already handing him some shirts. Not long after everyone wanted to have one and the stuff was handed around the room and before Dee knew the bag was empty except for a few things which were really for girls.

Couple of days later Dee was walking around town with Timo looking for a place to have some coffee. When they walked into a coffeehouse that wasn't so crowded as the last 4 they passed the bumped into Ville and Gas from HIM, the 2 of them gestured over to Dee and Timo to come sit with them so they did and walked over to their table in the back where you could still smoke. 'Hei Timo. Dee darling nice to see you again.. how are you?' Ville asked them when they reached the table and he got up to give Dee a hug and a kiss on the cheek and shook Timo's hand. The 2 sat down and looked through the menu what they wanted to drink. 'Ohh good good.. I texted you right about me and Jyrki getting engaged?' Dee asked Ville and he nodded yes. 'Ohh yeah that's right congratulations with that.. I was really happy and excited for you guys when I got the news.. so did he get you a ring yet?' Ville asked her again and Dee showed him the ring around her finger. 'Ohh looks really nice!' Gas answered her and Dee blushed while the waitress walked over and she and Timo both order their drinks. When the waitress got back and handed Dee her coffee she nearly jumped up out of happiness to finally have coffee after looking around Helsinki for an hour. 'Yay!! Latte!! Woohooo thank god for coffee!! Ohh sorry did I startle you?' Dee asked the waitress when she saw her taking a step back she just smiled politely and walked away. 'Yeah you did it again you scared another one.' Timo said to her grinning. 'Ohh shut it!!' Dee said to him while hitting him on the arm. They spend the entire afternoon in the coffee house talking to Ville and Gas, discussing albums touring and a lot of other things music related. Around 4 Dee got a phone call from Jo. 'Ohh holy crap.. Timo it's already 4 we forgot about Jo and Jussi remember we would meet them at 3.' Dee said laughing while picking up the phone, Timo in the meantime paid for their drinks they had and they all walked out and stopped in front of the coffee house. 'Hold on Jo have to say bye to Ville and Gas.' Dee said to Jo on the phone. 'What the hell? Your with Ville and Gas!! Dude I'm jealous is that why you forgot about us?' Jo joked and Dee laughed holding the phone away from her ear to say bye to Ville and Gas by giving them a hug and a kiss on the cheek. 'Bye guys see you later!!.. ohh Jo shut it. No that wasn't the reason it was one of them.. besides I needed my coffee shot as you know so where are you 2 now?' Dee said to Jo and heard her laugh. 'Downtown Helsinki where the comic artist hang or something like that the name of the place I can't freaking pronounce!!' Jo said to Dee and they both laughed. 'Hmm TT and I will find it see you In a few I guess then since I have no idea where we are now in Helsinki so.' Dee answered her and the girls hung up the phone. On their way back to Timo's car Dee told him where to go. 'Ohh great those are like a few streets where they can be since Jyrki has a few places he hangs out with Jussi.. was Jyrki with them?' Timo asked her and looked at his watch It was already passed 4:30 so he had to be with them now he would be done with the interviews and all he had to give all day. 'I have no idea to be honest I didn't ask we'll see. Now let's go before Jo gets even more impatient than she already is.' Dee chuckled and putted her seatbelt on and Timo started the car and they were on their way. 30 minutes later they were driving through the streets where Jo and the guys were suppose to be, they looked into every place Timo knew they could be but didn't see them since the windows were to dark. 'Ohh this is annoying I'll call Jo again to ask her to stand outside the damn place.' Dee said to Timo and he laughed. 'Hello' Jo answered the phone. 'dude get the hell outside of where ever you guys are! Please!' Dee said to her and she laughed and walked outside. 5 minutes later they spotted her and parked the car. 'Finally!! I thought you guys were never going to make it here!' Jo yelled at them since they where across the street. 'Oh don't get me started we drove by this place 4 times but we couldn't see a thing through those damn windows.' Dee said to her when they stood next to her and they all got inside, there were a lot of gothic like looking people in there all looking at Dee and Timo, they moved to the back of the place where everyone else was already waiting including Jyrki. 'Ohh Jyrki didn't know you where here to.. hi love.' Dee said to him while taking of her coat and sitting on a chair opposite from him on the other side of the table he just frowned at her. ' Why are you sitting over there?' he asked her now grinning. 'because there is no room on your side so. 'Dee said chuckling and saw him push the guy next to him away from him, he gestured over to Dee to sit next to him while talking to the guy in Finnish explaining that Dee was his fiancé and that he wanted her to sit next to him. The guy smiled and got up moving to another seat. 'Seriously.. you just asked him to move?' Dee said to him rolling her eyes while sitting next to him. 'Off course I explained who you were and he moved not having a problem with it.' He grinned while giving her a couple of kisses not letting her answer him immediately. 'great.. Jo we really have to learn Finnish just for the sake of this weird one here.' Dee said sarcastic pointing her thumb to Jyrki who sat there smirking his head of. 'Ohh yeah Jussi does the same you know.. we are both like yeah dude whatever we just sit over here or whatever and they go pushing people away so we can sit next to them... fins are weird.' Jo answered and Dee laughed. 'Could be.. or we are just to much American!.' Dee joked and the girls both burst out into laughter. They guys in the meantime had shook their heads once or twice and the 2 of them and continued drinking and talking to some of their friends in there while the girls chatted about America and Dee living with William again. 'Sooo.. did you have any thoughts on the wedding yet?' Jo asked Dee all of a sudden in the middle of the conversation. 'Pff dude I have like no idea.. since I don't know when he wants to get married or anything like it... so nope not really having my mind flowing in it so.. why?' Dee asked Jo which caught her of guard. 'Ohh no reason I was just wondering you know.' Jo said while sipping her drink. 'Jo you know me... I am not the kind of girl that goes and plans her wedding you know those things really don't interest me it's more your thing I mean how long have you been planning your wedding?? For like forever when you were still a little kid so.. I don't really care much about it.' Dee said to Jo who had turned a little red, it was true though, Jo had been planning her wedding ever since she was a little girl knowing exactly what kind of dress she wanted and what kind of flowers and the colours and everything she told Dee a couple of times about it, Dee just never cared she never thought she would get married though and she once told Jo that when the times was there for her Jo could plan it all for her since she liked that stuff. 'No like I said I was just wondering and all.. I mean you must have an idea of what you want right?' Jo asked Dee again who had burst out into laughter. 'Jo seriously if I had to plan my own wedding it wouldn't be a wedding but more like a horror fest you know.. and I once told you before my dear that you would be my wedding planner so consider yourself hired as our wedding planner so stop worrying about it since you got the job.' Dee said to her while smiling. Jo got up from her seat and bend down next to Dee to hug her. 'Ohh thank you thank you thank you!! It will be a honour for me to plan your wedding!!' Jo said all happy making Jyrki and Jussi turn their heads towards them and Dee just waved them of rolling her eyes while smiling. ' Okay.. okay. Jo you have to let go now I still have to be breathing for you to plan a wedding!!' Dee said sarcastic while chuckling, Jo released her and apologised. 'Sorry don't want to bride to be to be dead you know but seriously haven't you thought of anything yet?' Jo asked again and Dee rolled her eyes and tapped Jyrki on the shoulder, he turned around and looked at her. 'yes?? Love.' He asked her, Dee just grinned at him and excused him from the conversation he was in and pulled his full attention on her. 'Okay Jo over here wants to know stuff about our wedding like.. the colours and my dress and all sorts of stuff like that so yeah can you help her out?' Dee asked him and Jyrki didn't believe his ears. 'Uhm.. can't you I mean isn't that a girls thing?' Jyrki asked her and she chuckled and Jo started explaining to Jyrki why Dee couldn't, after 10 minutes of explaining Jyrki got the full idea why Dee couldn't. 'Ohh really?? That's funny I mean I am used to women always planning their weddings fully in their head so.. but uh. Well what do you want to know?' Jyrki asked Jo who shot into full question mode the second after he agreed of helping her. Dee just listened and agreed on some things if Jyrki asked her if she would like that to. 'So when do you guys want to get married?' Jo asked Jyrki while she already wrote down the things they just discussed in her day planner to remember them for later. 'Oh.. uhm.. I don't know really when do you want to get married?' Jyrki asked Dee who looked at him with unbelievable big eyes having no idea herself. 'Ohh god I don't know.. next year?? I mean it's nearing Christmas and new years now so I think it's better somewhere next year...uhm.' Dee said to him and he smiled. 'Next year it is.. let's see what month. Hmm..what do you say about May?' he asked her and Dee shook her head into no. Jo knew why Dee's parents had died in May. 'Okay what month do you want then?' Jyrki asked her again realising what was wrong with May again. 'June 5^th.' She said to them both and Jo's eyes shot up. 'Are you sure you want that date Dee?' Jo asked her and Jyrki could hear the change in her voice that something was up with that date. 'Yes absolutely.. is that okay with you babe?' Dee asked Jyrki and he looked at her again now trying to read her eyes but there was nothing in them he could detect. 'Oh yes fine by me but why June 5^th  rakkauteni?' He asked her after he confirmed the date was okay. Jo looked around the table at Dee and Jyrki waiting for her to say it. 'It's my mothers birthday.' Dee simply said and they continued discussing the wedding.

Back home Jo had gotten behind her laptop to start planning the wedding already, Jussi plunged himself down on the couch and grabbed the remote for the television and started flipping through channels. Jo in the meantime had moved form the table next Jussi with the laptop in her hands and put it down on the coffee table and walked towards the kitchen to get herself something to drink, Jussi glanced down to the laptop and read the heading of the file that stood open. 'uhm.. babe?? Why are you planning a wedding?' Jussi yelled over to the kitchen and Jo walked out of it again holding a glass of water. 'Ohh Dee asked me to plan her wedding she hates doing it herself so.' Jo answered him and sat down next to him putting the glass down and grabbing the laptop setting in on her lap. 'Ohh okay.. when is the wedding?' Jussi asked her and wrapped a arm around her watching her type the things she already discussed with Dee and Jyrki. 'Hmm.. June 5^th special day for Dee so.' Jo said being in thought and typing like mad. Jussi just sat next to her for a while with his arm wrapped around her watching one of his shows on television. 'Do you want to get married eventually?' he suddenly asked Jo making her stop typing immediately and look at him next to her still looking at the TV. 'Excuse me?' Jo answered and asked him and the same time. 'If you want to get married some day I mean I do.. but not yet you know want to wait a couple of years.' Jussi said to her and Jo smiled. 'Ohh yeah eventually when I am older I would love to get married and have kids and so.' Jo answered him and he smiled putting down the remote and turned his attention to her again. 'Kids?? I would love to have kids with you.' He said smiling at her to make her giggle and close her laptop setting it away on the side table. 'Aww I love you my weir fin!' Jo said to him and kissed him and he pulled her in his arms kissing her back. In the meantime Dee had taken a shower and was now sitting on the sofa next to Jyrki drinking coffee while watching TV. He was twisting his fingers in her still wet hair in the back of her neck while she was leaning her head on his shoulder. 'Love?' Jyrki whispered to her. 'Hmm? Yes..' Dee answered him and sat up straight to look at him he had his hand still on the back of her neck twisting her hair between his fingers. 'Are you sure you want to get married.. I mean since well you never really cared about it as I heard from Jo this night.' He said to her looking down. Dee smiled and lifted his chin up with her hand so that she could look at him, she moved her legs over his so that she sat on his lap facing him and took his face between her hands and softly chuckled. 'Off course I want to get married it's not that I never wanted it to.. it's just I don't like all the planning around it.. I like it simple it doesn't have to be a big thing to me.. as long as your there everything is fine with me.' Dee smiled and looked him deep into his eyes and kissed his forehead. He grinned at this answer since he loved every bit about it, he looked at her and let his right hand slip behind her neck again and pulled her face closer to his so that he could kiss her. 'So.. you really want to be my wife?' he asked her again and she chuckled nodding yes. 'Hmm okay.. but what about your dress?? I mean I can't pick out your dress as well.' He said to her and she started laughing. 'Off course not.. that's bad luck remember? Just tell me what you will be wearing in colours and I will adjust my dress to it... I mean it's months away we still have time.' Dee said to him and he smiled. 'Black and Red.' He said immediately and grinned. 'Red?? Off course what else can you expect from a vampire.. okay love red it is.' She said to him and kissed him, he got up from the sofa having her wrap her legs around his hips and walked over to the bedroom still having his lips locked on hers and moved over to the bed, putting her down first and then himself on top of her still kissing which turned into heavy and passionate the moment he put her down on the bed. He moved from her lips to her neck and collarbone while taking of her robe, she already started unbuttoning his shirt taking it of and moving her hands into his hair when he had moved up to her lips again to kiss her. She switched position by rolling on top of him and started unbuckling his pants, once every piece of clothing was off he rolled back on top of her and pulled the covers over them, kissing her stomach moving his way up to her breasts and from her collarbone back to her jaw line and her lips while slowly going in to her making her gasp and moan by the movement. He was very tender and moved on a slow rhythm kissing her neck while she dug her nails into his back. When he had picked up the pace and the heavy breathing had turned into heavy moaning she had dug her nails fiercely into his back while arching her own working her way to the climax.

Chapter 19   it's not a crime to have some fun.

'No, I'm not coming home yet... I don't even know I am coming back to Finland.' Dee said to Jyrki after being a hour on the phone with him. 'Why not?? I mean don't you want to come back then?? What are you saying..' Jyrki started but Dee stopped him telling him she needed a while to get her thoughts straight and that she needed some distractions. 'What do you mean?? Are you going with Tuomas?' Jyrki started again and Dee sighed while rolling her eyes getting frustrated, everyone else in the room noticed and Donny already got up moving towards her. 'No you damn idiot!! I am not I am travelling with Donny to New York a few days for some gigs he asked me to go with him!! So stop thinking I am together with Tuomas since I am freaking not okay!!' Dee yelled at the phone. Then the yelling and the cursing started on both ends of the phone partially in Finnish and English to one another. Dee then started crying but furiously so Donny stepped in and grabbed the phone. 'Jyrki!! Chill out man.. no she is not coming back on the phone.. yeah you heard me she will call you again when she is ready.. dude don't start towards me now. Goodbye!' Donny said while hanging up the phone handing it back to Tuomas. 'are you okay?' Tuomas asked Dee who was out of it still crying lighting up a cigarette. 'No!! the idiot kept accusing me of the fact that I probably don't want to see him because he thinks we are together which is not the case but he won't listen!!' Dee said now getting up to get herself something to drink. 'fucking idiot!' she mumbled to herself while getting the wine she bought earlier on the day. 'Soo... are you going back to Finland or not?' Emppu asked her caution in his tone. Dee walked back into the room already having her glass half empty while carrying the bottle with her. 'Hmm don't know we'll see after New York.. I keep my mind blank until then... who wants a glass?' Dee said holding up the bottle while sitting down. The night ended very late around 4 in the morning Nightwish left and went over to their hotel to rest before travelling further on their tour. Dee was saying goodnight to Tuomas and almost lost her control once again. 'So are you sure your okay?' he asked her standing at her door while she was leaning against the wall next to it half wobbly on her feet of the wine she drank. 'yup I'm okay... you know.. I am totally single at the moment now and it freaks me out a little.' She answered him and he had to swallow since this is actually one of the things he hoped for but it didn't feel good to him now. 'remember what we said to one another the first time we met?' Dee asked him obviously being drunk and having no idea what she was doing, she took a step closer to him almost close enough to touch her head against his chin. 'Yes, I remember.' Tuomas stumbled out the words since he was getting more nervous by the second of her moving closer and closer to him even if he took steps back from her. Dee noticed and stood up on her toes kissing him hard, since this is what he wanted even if he didn't he kissed her back pushing her against him wrapping his hands around the back of her neck and back. They moved from the door back inside Dee kicking the door closed and moved towards her bedroom still having her lips locked on his. They managed to open her bedroom door and closed it again moving towards the bed and dropped themselves down on it still kissing each other hard and passionately.  The clothes were coming of and Tuomas suddenly stopped when her shirt was tossed to the other side of the room and let go of her. 'What!?' Dee asked and demanded at the same time looking at him leaning on top of her. 'I can't do this.. as much as I really want it. I really can't I feel like I am taking advantage of you now.' Tuomas said to her and Dee chuckled. 'Your not my sweet.. I want this.. I really do.' Dee answered him and started kissing him again but he pushed himself away from her again. 'Your drunk.. I am not taking advantage of you when you are in this state.. besides think of Jyrki.. do you really want to do this to him?' Tuomas asked her and Dee let her hands drop of his back and looked at him stunned not believing he was turning her down now, but understood after a couple of minutes what he meant and that this was wrong. 'damn you fins! Alright alright I get it.. I can't do this I am sorry.' Dee said pushing him entirely of her and got up from the bed grabbing her clothes and tossed them on the chair next to her closet while opening her closet getting herself a top and shorts out to wear to sleep. 'So I'll go then now okay.. have fun tomorrow going to New York and please let me hear something if your going back to Finland or are in Finland okay?' Tuomas asked her already picking up his clothes and headed to the bedroom door. Dee stopped by throwing shorts over to him and then walked over to him and took his clothes from his hands and dropped them on the same chair as hers. 'No your not going.. your staying I need some sanity in this room.' She said to him and walked towards the bathroom. When she got back he was still standing on the same spot waiting for her but had already put the shorts on. 'Coming?' Dee asked him and walked towards her bed and got in opening the covers for him. 'excuse me? You want me to sleep in the same bed as you?' he asked her and Deer rolled her eyes and got up from the bed again. Grabbed him by the hand and pulled him towards the bed. 'In!' she pointed and chuckled he obeyed and got in the bed laughing himself a bit. 'Good now.. goodnight and see you in the morning my sweet.' She said to him and got in the bed herself and threw the covers over them. He moved a little over to her to whisper goodnight to her, she smiled and took his arm and pulled it over her stomach so that he was closer to her and fell asleep.

Back in Finland everyone got a lecture from Jyrki about Dee's behaviour. Including Jo who sat there grinning after a while and rolled her eyes at him and just turned back to her phone instead. 'What?? What are you grinning about this isn't funny you know!!' Jyrki yelled and Jo burst out into laughter while shaking her head at him. 'Don't you get it?? She is coming back you idiot.. she just needs time and I know Dee.... She is just the punk that goes against everything that is against her now.. she will be back mark my words she cares to much about you.. did she say she was going over to New York?' Jo asked him while checking her phone again. 'Yes she is at least that's what she said.. how do you mean punk?' Jyrki asked her now calming down. 'Ohh lets say Dee is just a little bit out of control sometimes while not giving a shit about everything else... remember she is punk rock to the bone she loves going against rules and everything when she is in a situation like this remember what she did with Jay? She just left for another country and well the rest you know.' Jo said to him now knowing where Dee was going to. 'Aha!! Now I get it!! Damn not fair!' Jo said chuckling. 'What's not fair?' Jussi asked her giving her a kiss on the cheek, Jo smiled at him and showed him her phone. 'That little nidiot is going over to See My Chemical Romance in New York and New Jersey! Damn wish I could go but hey one of her fave bands so. We met them once I believe 2 years ago when they weren't that big yet.' Jo answered Jussi being half in her own thoughts thinking back to that ridiculously weird evening. 'Ohh I didn't know she loved that band.. they are good in way they have a lot of misfits influences and so.' Jussi answered her and Jo almost fell of her chair from laughter. 'Dude seriously?? Did you never watched her clothes and bags and all?? She has a lot of MCR shit it's almost insane.' Jo  chuckled and gave him a kiss still chuckling. 'So as you know her the best.. what shall I do now? I mean stay here and wait for her or go to New York and get her back?' Jyrki asked Jo. 'Hmm if I know Dee and the rebel she is being now... I would say wait for her.. if you interrupt her now she will go even madder that she already is.' Jo answered him and he sighed. 'Okay.. I will do that then just wished she had her phone with her you know... must be my age but I am worried! It's insane!.' Jyrki said and threw his drink back.

Dee had woken up and found Tuomas still asleep next to her she looked at the clock that said 1 and got up, she shook Tuomas and he woke up. 'Tuomas.. you have to get up your leaving in 2 hours to the next city and I am leaving In a few hours myself to New York with Donny and his mates so get up!!' Dee laughed when he pulled the covers over his head again not wanting to get up. 'Duuuudeee!!! Get up!! I'm serious stop being a kid your 28 for gods sake!' Dee said now trying to pull the covers of him and he let go of them and grabbed her around the waist pulling her in the bed again. He locked his arms around her and kissed her cheek. 'Almost 28 honey not quit yet you know.. besides I don't need that much time to get ready and back to the hotel.' He said to her and Dee started laughing trying to get lose from his grip, which finally worked out after 10 minutes of half wrestling him she stood next to the bed again giggling. 'I love you I do but god.. you have to let me win sometime.. you Fins are mean!' Dee said walking towards her closet to get her suitcase out and going through her clothing racks dropping clothes in there she wanted to take with her to New York. 'You want me to help you with that?' he asked her while moving over to her suitcase already grabbing some clothes folding them more properly and putting them in the suitcase. 'I want you to get yourself ready.. so go take a shower and whatever.. William will lend you some clothes.. dude that's my underwear your holding!' Dee laughed and snatched it out of his hands. 'I know.. looks nice as I say so.' He winked and got up and walked out the room towards William's. Dee got done after a half an hour packing her suitcase which contained more than she actually needed and she packed a second one which was fully unnecessary but as she didn't know she was going back to Finland she just packed it. She put them both outside near the front door and walked back to her room to get her own clothes and go for a shower. Tuomas then walked back into her room fully dressed and his hair still wet from the shower. 'All done!! Happy now?' He said to her and she smiled. 'Yes perfect.. now if you don't mind I have to get myself ready just got 2 hours left before Donny's here so.' She answered him and walked past him into the living room and when she passed her brother he gave her a look. 'Dude I didn't okay.. I was to drunk.. you know me!' Dee yelled at him when she closed the bathroom door, he just chuckled and continued watching television now joined by Tuomas. 'So did you guys have?' William asked him and Tuomas turned half red. 'Ohh god .. uhh no we didn't we both wanted to but both stopped after we realised we really didn't want to and besides I wouldn't take advantage of her when she is in the state she was last night.' Tuomas said to William and he grinned. 'I know you wouldn't.. so I guess you 2 are friends now and nothing more?' William asked him again and Tuomas smiled and nodded yes. Dee got done showering and had something to eat. After eating some breakfast which you could better call lunch by the time of it she had to say bye again to Tuomas and was now standing outside the door with him giving him a hug. 'Thank you for not taking advantage of me and thank you for talking everything through and for staying last night.. means a lot to me.' Dee said to him and he smiled looking at her while stroking some strands of hair out of her face. 'Your welcome.. and yes I would never do that.. so.. uh.. I think its better if we stay friends.. you know.. you belong to him.' Tuomas said to her and she smiled. 'The best of friends!' she answered him and stood on her toes again to give him a last kiss on the lips. 'Best of friends indeed.. Bye charming lady and promise me you give him another chance.' He said to her while already walking down the hall towards the elevator.  'I promise.. and you keep in your head that you to are my Rakkauteni!! Love you my sweet!' She said to him before waving and getting back into the apartment. He smiled and the elevator closed and he was back on his way to his band to tell them everything that happened and continue their tour. Dee was picked up by Donny and 2 of his friends and said goodbye to her brother and they took of towards the airport to get the next flight to New York.

'New York Fucking City!!' Dee yelled when they got into the hotel room they had. The 4 of them were in there but Dee didn't care she had to share the room with 3 other guys since they were all like brothers to her. 'Great isn't it?? I am so glad we are back here. Remember the last time?? With Jo.' Donny asked her and Dee laughed falling back on her bed still overly excited. 'Dude of course it was awesome. I bet she already figured out why we are here now I bet Jyrki told her everything I yelled at him.' Dee said laughing now thinking back to the argument she had with Jyrki and that it was completely stupid and pointless and that they both overreacted. 'Yeah.. also a MCR gig then but back when they weren't famous yet.. I wonder if they still know us.' Donny said teasingly which was unnecessary since he kept in touch with Mikey ever since and they had become good friends. 'Dude now your just being a idiot they do know you.. you have been here a couple times afterwards  me I have no idea if they still know me although they did take picture's of us back then... I know it's going to be awesome!' Dee said still over excited. 'Ohh yeah it will I remember you being a complete badass with Frank... you guys were nuts with the.. what was it cupcake fight?' Donny said to her and Dee had burst out in laughter again remembering it all to well that she and Frankie had ambushed Ray and Gerard with cupcakes. They slept for the rest of the day since they hadn't on the flight and the gig wasn't until 8 tonight. What Dee didn't know that Donny arranged a little get together with MCR before the gig and that they had backstage passes. When they all woke up again at 5 in the afternoon they all started to get ready. It wasn't until 6:30 that Donny revealed the backstage passes to Dee and had her completely screaming and jumping up in down in front of him. 'Ohh my fucking god!! You didn't.. aww Donny this is awesome thank you!!!' she said to him giving him a kiss on his cheek while hugging him. They moved down from their hotel towards the venue which wasn't far from the hotel just 3 blocks they had to walk. In front of the venue was madness kids screaming their lungs out to see MCR and all wearing MCR gear some bought and other handmade. Dee shot pictures of a lot of them and with some together since she loved the way they looked. Donny showed security their passes and he let them in and guided them towards the dressing room. 'Dude.. I am nervous and I have no idea why I hope they don't think I am a alien.' Dee joked towards Donny and he laughed while knocking on the door waiting for someone to open it. The door opened and Mikey stood on the other side and greeted Donny with a hug. 'Hey dude!! You guys made it so good to see you how are you?' Mikey asked Donny and gestured everyone to get in Dee just followed and so did Zack and Chris, Donny's friends. Dee stood in the room looking around it seeing Frank, Gerard , Ray and their new drummer Bob. 'Hey guys .. yeah I'm good so good to be back here.. been a while you know.' Donny said to Mikey and he smiled and offered them to sit down. 'Holy shit!! Are you Dee??' Gerard then asked Dee when she sat down and had putted her hair a little more out of her face. 'Yup.. the one and only.. funny that you still now me.' Dee said laughing while putting her bag down. 'Off course we know you!! Get up!!' Gerard said to her and Dee got up and he hugged her not long after everyone did and Frankie nearly jumped her to the ground. 'Yeah!! Cupcake buddy!! Good to see you we missed you!! We always thought you would come see us together with Donny but the last time he was here he told us you were in Finland and was dating a dude there.' Frankie said to her now sitting down next to her. 'Yup.. I am dating Jyrki from the 69 eyes don't know if you guys ever heard of them.. and well we are going through a rough patch now.. and well I am not sure yet if I am going back to Finland of not.' Dee said to Frankie and he smiled. 'You will... of what Donny had told us about you.. I think you will.' Frankie said to her and she smiled and he hugged her. The show started and was beyond awesome the 4 of them went completely insane since they stood front line right in front of the guys banging their heads and Donny , Chris and Zack getting involved into mosh pits. Dee just laughing her head of at them and was constantly rocking out with Gerard and Frankie whenever their attention was on her or near her. 'Up you go shorty!!' Donny had said in the middle of the gig lifting Dee up and letting her crowd surf. The show ended and they got backstage again into the dressing room. 'Great show guys!!' Dee said to them once in the room. They got themselves ready and went out to party and eat after. Once back at the hotel they got their bags since the band offered them a ride to New Jersey and a place to crash. So they checked out of the hotel again and hopped into the tour bus waiting out side of the hotel and partied on in the bus on their way to New Jersey.

Jo had woken up from a text Dee had send over to her with Donny's phone. 'Hey Jo.. I guess you know I am in Jersey right now partying my head of.. Jersey dude!!! Anyhow I wanted to let you know I am okay and stuff and are laughing my ass of with Frankie and the new drummer Bob he is awesome.. well honey later!! P.S I have no idea if I am coming back yet still thinking about it so. Xoxo Dee.' Jo read the text and half flipped. 'Holy fucking damn shit!' she said out loud and woke up Jussi. 'Babe.. are you alright? Go back to sleep it's 4 in the morning.' He said to her still half asleep wrapping a arm around her. 'Jussi.. De just texted me! She doesn't know if she wants to come back.' She said to him and his eyes shot wide open and he read the message. 'Do you think we have to show it to Jyrki? I mean I bet he wants to know you know.' Jussi said now yawning again putting his head back on one of the pillows. 'Goddamn it! That's what I think about it.. yeah I guess we have to let him know and all.. fuck!!' Jo said again while putting down her phone and giving in to Jussi's  attempts to get her back to sleep again. Back in New Jersey the 2^nd gig was over and Dee was now at the airport with everyone saying goodbye to everyone after a good talk with Donny and MCR she decided to go back to Finland to Jyrki she just loved him to damn much. 'Thanks again you guys I loved these 2 days they were awesome and I am so sorry for dragging you guys all to the airport at 3 in the morning.. but as we checked it was the first flight over there so.. aww I will miss you my cupcake buddy!' Dee said to Frankie while giving him a hug and a kiss on the cheek she always liked Frankie the most of the band even though they all shared the same insanity. 'Aww miss you to babe!! Go get your guy and be sure to introduce us to him in the future and you have to come see us more often! Give Jo her gifts okay!' Frankie said to her and she chuckled. They made one last picture with all of them together on it all making a weird or funny face and Dee walked towards the gate of her flight waving goodbye to them all and yelling towards Donny to let William know she went back but would be back again soon. In the evening everyone got back together in the recording studio to jam and Jo joined them. 'Uhh Jyrki I have to show you something.. it's from Dee she texted it to me.' Jo said to him and showed him the text. Jyrki read it and had to sit down since he couldn't believe his eyes reading the message. 'Do you think she isn't coming back anymore?' he asked Jo all of a sudden really calm. 'I don't know.. I can't really tell what she is thinking now.' Jo answered him and he sighed again and got up to jam again. Few hours later they got hungry and Jo offered to get them something to eat and was joined by Bazie. They walked around the corner to the take-off there and walked in. they had to wait for 30 minutes until the food was ready and sat themselves at the window seats to look at the people outside the street. The bell ranged and their number was called and they got the food and walked out again. 'So do you think she won't come back?? I sorry I overheard you and Jyrki.' Bazie said to Jo and Jo smiled a kind smile. 'Hmm I don't know.. we have to wait and see you know.. I just hope she comes back.' Jo answered him and looked into the bags to check if they had everything. They could hear heels clicking behind them and were closing in on them but they didn't pay attention to it, it wasn't until a woman's voice asked them what they were going to eat that they turned around to see who it was. 'So.. what are you having to eat.. smells wonderful if I say so myself.' Dee said to Jo and Bazie while walking behind them. They turned around on the spot and both their mouths dropped and Jo almost dropped the bags, seeing Dee standing their long black coat on while wearing a black blouse with vampire collar hot pants tights and her knee boots. 'Holy shit!! Dee your back!! What the hell you scared me there I thought you weren't coming back!!' Jo said out loud now putting the bags on the ground to go over to her friend that stood opposite from her smiling and give her a hug. 'Thank Frankie.. he was the one convincing me to come back and besides I missed you guys... hey B!' Dee said while letting go of Jo to give Bazie a hug. 'Aww nice t have you back since you have to fix our head vampire.. since he is losing his head.' Bazie said to her and Dee grinned. 'I know.. that's why I am here.. so you guys need help with that.. ohh smells good is that pizza??' Dee asked and grinned taking over the pizza boxes Bazie was holding and walked with them over to the studio. Bazie took the boxes over again knowing would need her hands and arms to be free. He walked in first followed by Jo and some seconds later By Dee. Jyrki and Jussi were still jamming together with Archzie and Timo when they walked in first not even noticing Dee partially because she walked in later after Jo. 'Guys you never guess what we found.'  Bazie said and Jo smiled looking at Jussi. 'What did you find? A bag of money?' Timo said jokingly opening one of the pizza boxes everyone was already half into the food since they were all hungry. 'Well I think I am a little better than a bag of money to be honest.' Dee said to Timo and everyone looked up not believing their ears except for Jo and Bazie. Dee still stood at the door not able to move and if she had to move she would be out the door again. Jyrki got up from his seat immediately and walked over to her stopping a few steps away from her. 'Dee.. you came back.. I thought you wouldn't come back.' Jyrki said to her and Dee looked up to him and smiled a little. 'if you don't mind and I really hope you don't I prefer you calling me rakkauteni.. and maybe consider of well giving me another chance... I really hope you can forgive me I am so sorry of what I have done to you.' Dee said to him and let her eyes wander back to the floor while nervously fumbling with her hands behind her back waiting for his response. Everyone else in the room was completely silent looking at the scene between them. Jyrki didn't think twice and moved over to her and wrapped his arms around her almost crushing her against his chest. 'I forgive you for everything!! I don't ever want to lose you again rakkauteni never! I love you!' he said to her and Dee snapped out of it throwing her arms around him hugging him back tightly, he loosened his grip a little on her and slipped his right hand under her chin to lift her face up so that he could look into her eyes. 'I love you..' he said to her and Dee smiled back to him. 'I love you to more than anything in this world.' She said to him and he kissed her. 'promise me to never leave like that again!! You nearly given me a heart attack!' he said to her while handing her phone back when they had sat back down with the other to eat, Dee was getting hugged by everyone but mostly by Jussi and Timo since they where extremely happy she was back. 'Guys I need to breath!!.. Guys please!!' Dee laughed while half suffocating. 'Sorry Dee.. we missed you! Good to have you back!' Timo said to her and they all laughed since Dee got up and sat next to Archzie who grinned. 'The only safe place around here is next to Archzie since he isn't the one trying to kill me with hugs!' Dee said to them half hiding behind Archzie. 'Are you sure about that?? I mean if you want me to I can hug you to death to.. there is only one of us who can kill you now by hugging and that is Jyrki.' Archzie said laughing pointing over to Jyrki who wasn't able to keep his eyes of Dee thinking to himself he could lose her again. 'Hmm your probably right there.' Dee said getting up again sitting back next to Jyrki who was looking at her again with that same look of not wanting to let her go. 'Rakkauteni?' he sad to her. 'Yes? What's up?' Dee said to him looking at him while taking a bit from her pizza slice. 'Will you marry me?' he asked her and Dee half chocked in her pizza so did everyone else. 'Your asking me to??' Dee said t him with huge eyes and he smiled. 'Yes I am asking you to marry me.' He said still looking at her. Dee looked back at him for a long while asking herself a lot of questions in her head such as , am I ready to get married? Do I want to get married to Jyrki? Do I love him enough for it?. After a very long pause of silence Dee had reconsidered all the thoughts In her head and had only one answer ready. 'Yes I will marry you.' She answered him.              

Chapter 18  Then you lose complete control.

'hmm I thought so.' Dee said to Jo after a moment of silence. 'Well better go tell him then.' Dee said again while getting up half balancing on her feet throwing her drink back. Jo and Jussi then snapped out of it. 'Hold on.. your not telling him now are you? He is in conversation with Tuomas now... you can't tell him Dee!' Jussi said to her grabbing her by the shoulders to hold her back. 'let go!! Jussi stop it!! I am going to tell him and there is nothing that you can do to stop me!! Now let me the fuck go!!' Dee said pulling herself lose from him. 'Jo stop her!!' Jussi said to Jo who was still half shocked looking at Dee and then snapped completely out of it but was to late, Dee had already reached the table where Tuomas , Jyrki and HIM were sitting and pulled a chair with her and placed it in front of Tuomas and Jyrki sitting on it, putting her empty glass on the table. 'Love? Are you alright?' Jyrki asked her and Dee nodded yes and smiled. 'Yes. Well.. no actually.. I am not sure.. but I have to tell you something.. it has been bugging me for several weeks now and I just have to get it out of my system.. do with it whatever you like.. but know this that I love you more than anything in the world!! Anything!! Alright.' Dee said to Jyrki and he nodded yes being beyond prepared of what was coming to him. Tuomas in the mean time was looking at Dee with huge eyes knowing what she was going to say.  'well here it goes... and believe me I will completely understand if you don't want anything to do with me anymore after hearing this so...' Dee said to him and saw his eyes grew. 'okay I'll keep it short... I kissed Tuomas and told him I loved him.. which I do I seriously do.. but he doesn't mean as much to me as you do. I am so sorry.' Dee said to him and everyone's mouth dropped including Jo and Jussi's who had came to sit by the table. Jyrki looked at her with ice cold eyes and then at Tuomas who had frozen to the spot, he then addressed Dee again. 'When?' he asked without any emotion in his voice he was just cold. 'the day Tarja came to us and tonight.' Dee said feeling the tears come to her eyes and her heart breaking, she kept looking at the floor and didn't dare to look up. 'You did what!!' Jyrki suddenly shouted towards her and Tuomas and she looked up in shock to find him standing on his feet. 'No I swear to god Jyrki.. I don't want to come in between you 2 I'm serious!!' Tuomas started and Jyrki started shouting in Finnish to him cursing him and yelling, Tuomas defended himself as far as he could by trying to reason with him. They than heard a door slam and all looked at it, when they looked back to the rest of them they all noticed Dee was gone. 'Holy shit!!! We have to get her!!' Jo shouted jumping to her feet running towards the door swinging it open running out on the street turning her head from left to right. Everyone followed her out and with everyone it really was everyone HIM , Nightwish and the 69 eyes were out on the street seconds after Jo looking everywhere. 'where can she be?' Jyrki asked Jo worried knowing he drove her away from her and all he wanted was to have her close to him. 'excuse me?' Jo answered him looking at him dumbfounded not believing her ears. 'what?? You think I would let her go so easily?? I love her Jo I forgive her!! She means the world to me. I don't care she kissed him... I love her!!' Jyrki said furiously now shouting Dee's name everywhere while dialling her number. 'so you forgive her? What about him?' Jo asked Jyrki seeing his hand shaking while looking at his phone since Dee just didn't answer. 'We'll see Tuomas and I have a lot of talking to do but right now all that matters to me is to find her!' he answered Jo and walked towards his car.

In the meantime they were looking for her Dee already got to the apartment of Jyrki and was now pulling all her clothes out of the closet into her suitcases, she cried her heart out during the thing and searched through the rooms for her stuff getting everything she had with her and threw it in her suitcases. She then found her passport and took a piece of paper and wrote a note to Jyrki that said. 'I'm sorry I did this to you even when you cared so much about me I am deeply truly sorry, for this I have to leave you since I cant stand the thought of causing you more pain than I already have.  I love you. 'forever yours' Daremo. She placed the note on the kitchen table together with her phone. She grabbed her suitcases and put them on the hall before dropping the key into his letter box and walked out towards the cab waiting for her to bring her to the airport. The cab took of and almost speeded towards the airport Dee had no idea if there was a flight going to L.A. and when but she took her chances for it. Jyrki pulled up in front of the apartment and rushed inside together with Ville , Jo and Jussi they searched around the apartment until suddenly Jo froze at the kitchen table spotting the note under Dee's phone. 'Jyrki!! In here she left you a note!!' Jo shouted and took the piece of paper from under the phone and read it swiftly having her mind running on full speed. Jyrki walked in the kitchen and Jo handed him the note and he read it, when he was done he looked at the phone and then at Jo. 'She left me? Why on earth would she do that!! We have to find her I am serious!! She can't leave me.. she can't!!' Jyrki raised his voice louder and louder grabbing the phone of the table looking through it if he could find any clue's of where she could be. 'don't worry we will find her.. I promise we will.' Ville said to him patting him on the shoulder, Jyrki then looked up and smiled he was crying for the first time ever he was crying over a girl he loved more than anything on the world. Dee had found a flight over to L.A. and was now boarding the plane, several minutes later it took of and she was on her way home. She slept for most of the flight while sobbing into the hoodie Jyrki had given her with her name on it. Several hours later the plane landed and Dee was now walking over to the luggage boards. She got her luggage and walked out towards the cab area and stopped a cab stuffed her suitcases in the trunk and told the cabdriver where to go to.

3 days later and Jyrki or anyone else still had no idea where she was since she deleted all the numbers of her brother and friends in L.A. and Jo didn't own all of them but managed to call William and Donny asking them if they had seen Dee, they all said they hadn't which wasn't entirely true most of the calls they received Dee sat right next to them telling them to not say in anyway that she was in L.A. or anywhere near. 'that's it!! I'm going over there to see if she is not there!!' Jyrki had yelled after the last call towards William. 'but they haven't seen her she can be anywhere you know that... besides it's best for us to let Nightwish find out if she is anywhere near there since they are performing there tonight.' Jo said to him, it was true Nightwish left a little over 2 days ago to tour America and they would be playing in L.A. tonight. Tuomas and Marco where walking down the boulevard in Hollywood looking around at the shops when Marco suddenly stopped staring at something. 'What you see something?' Tuomas asked him and looked towards the same direction he saw Marco staring at a woman across the street with a long black coat on coming out of a shop, when he looked closer he recognised her immediately. 'Marco.. that's her!! That's Dee!! We have to get to her.' Tuomas said while looking at his friend who was already texting over to Jyrki that they had seen Dee in Hollywood. They crossed the street and walked after her to find her getting into a truck where another man was sitting in. Tuomas recognised him as William her brother. 'Do we still have her address??' Marco asked him when the car drove away. 'Yes we do Jyrki gave it to us just in case. Shall we take a cab towards it?' Tuomas asked Marco and he nodded yes and they held the first cab that came into view telling him to go to Dee's house. 'Did you get the tickets?' William asked his sister when they drove over to her place in Santa Monica. 'Yeah I was lucky there were like a couple left so.. tonight we are going to see Nightwish lets hope they don't find out we are there... by the way thanks for letting me live with you again.. I miss Hollywood.' Dee said to her brother while they pulled up at her place. 'off course kid there is room enough for 4 people so and besides I missed having you around.. just these last boxes and we are done and you can leave the keys at the landlords.' William said while they walked in the door and picked up the last boxes of Dee that where standing there. When they walked down the steps towards the truck with the last boxes William passed Marco and Tuomas who walked over to the elevator. Dee was still on the chair fighting with the box she was holding and William stopped her. 'what?' Dee whispered back. 'Uh.. those Nightwish dudes just got in the elevator.' William said to her and Dee half choked. 'we have to go now William!' She said and when the elevator closed they walked fast towards the truck and Dee dropped the key in a envelope quickly putting it in the mailbox of her landlord and sped towards the truck getting in and they took of again. 'Marco there she goes!' Tuomas said when they had looked down and saw the truck drive away. 'Well we just have to find out where she can be now call Jo and ask for her brothers address.' Marco said to him and they took the elevator down again getting back into a cab towards the venue. Back in Finland Jyrki had almost jumped through the ceiling hearing Dee was indeed in Hollywood , he already started packing his bag for the trip. 'Stop!! Jyrki we cant just go over there.. besides is just got a text from Tuomas telling me that she left her house and that she lives somewhere else.' Jo said while they stopped him from packing, he turned around and looked at her with a disappointing look on his face. 'She moved?? Why on earth would she do that?' he asked Jo who just raise her shoulders and received another text from Tuomas. 'Ohh god! She I living with William again.' Jo said and sat down while putting down her phone and putting her head in her hands. 'What is that a bad thing?? I mean they can just go over there and try and talk some reason in to her.' Jussi said to her while wrapping a arm around her. 'I have no idea where he lives!' Jo burst out still holding her head in her hands.

Showtime Dee , William and Donny were all in front of the doors towards the venue waiting in line to get in, Dee being worried out of her mind that they maybe seen her or knew she was coming and was looking around her all the time. 'Aww chill kid they don't know you're here and besides you have me and Don to watch after you so stop the weirdo actions please!.' William laughed and Donny nodded in agreement with a huge grin on his face. Donny took hold of Dee's hand and pulled her after him into the venue since the lines were getting smaller closer to the entrance and Dee was getting half lost in it, she took hold of his hand tightly and kept holding it until they were in the actual hall where everyone was running to get in front. 'Kid? Where do you want to stand?' William asked Dee after they hung their coats. 'Ohh uhm. Right side of the stage please.' She said taking hold of Donny's hand again, he didn't mind since he knew how freaked out she was getting. Meanwhile backstage Tuomas was glancing into the crowd searching for familiar faces, after 10 minutes he finally spotted a familiar face in the crowd next to an unfamiliar face he didn't know. 'she is out there.' Tuomas said to Marco, Emppu and Jukka who were also scanning the crowd. He pointed out where she was standing and that she was here with her brother and a different dude he didn't know. 'I wonder who he is.' Emppu said when he spotted her. Tuomas lifted up his shoulders and arms and gave a disapproving look over to her. 'Probably her new boyfriend.' He said angry and walked away to have his few minutes alone before they entered the stage. 'Well we have to get this settled.. Marco can you go over to security and point them out so that we can have them backstage after the concert.' Emppu asked and Marco was already on his way shouting okay back to him. The concert started and the crowd moved more forwards pulling Dee , Donny and her brother with it. 'Oh great now I'm sure they can see me.' Dee mumbled under her breath when Tuomas entered the stage with the rest of the band Tarja followed a few moments after, they where right in front of his keyboard set and he could actually see them very good if he would look up from his instrument. Dee tried to hide herself by standing behind a guy that was taller than her but with no luck halfway into the concert her eyes met Tuomas' and she froze on the spot seeing all the anger and disappointment he had in them. She looked around for a way out she didn't want to be here now, not when he looked at her that way, she turned around on her spot and finally spotted a little opening in the crowd she looked at her brother and Donny both completely into the concert and poked her brother. 'William I have to go to the bathroom.. I'll be right back okay? Does any of you need anything else? Dee shouted to her brother over the music, he nodded no and gave her the thumbs up and she smiled and slipped through the crowd to the side. Once out of the crowd she looked around for a way out, she spotted and door at the end of the room and turned around to walk to it when she felt someone tapping her shoulder, she turned around and faced security. 'Yes??' Dee answered him. 'Miss you have to come with us for a moment.' Security said to her already putting a hand on her shoulder to move her. 'Uh.. Okay' Dee said to him having no idea what was going on and followed him backstage and was left in a room with something to drink. About 30 minutes later after she sat there the door opened again and her brother and Donny walked in both having the same stunned look on their faces like Dee had a half an hour before. 'Dee!! Here you are we were looking for you and than this dude brought us here telling us they needed us or something.' William said sitting down next to his sister giving her a hug since she looked freaked out again. 'I have no idea.. but I don't like it!' Dee said while Donny sat on the other side of her. 'I have a strange feeling these Nightwish guys are behind this.. like you said they must have seen you and told security to get you back here and all so they can get to you.. I mean you have been gone long enough for them to think you disappeared of the side of the planet.' Donny suddenly said and Dee's mouth dropped. 'Son of a bitch!!' she yelled and got up swearing in English , French and Finnish well the few words she knew in Finnish then walking around the room. 'I guess this is not a good thing?' Donny asked leaning over to her brother who was watching his sister going half way insane in the room. 'Hmm nope not really.. since believe me you don't want to know what she Is saying now.' He answered him out of the corner of his mouth. The music had stopped 10 minutes ago and they 3 could hear sounds outside of the door and Dee recognised the voices discussing in Finnish. She walked towards the door angry and pulled it open finding Tuomas , Emppu , Marco and Jukka outside of it. 'You!!!' she spat at Tuomas while storming at him. Jukka and Emppu took hold of her quickly while she screamed at him. 'Why can't you just leave me alone why!!!' she screamed at him and started crying while holding on to Jukka and Emppu. Donny and William were at her side very fast Donny taking her over from Jukka and Emppu thanking them for holding her back. 'can't you see she doesn't want this anymore that it broke her heart?' William asked Tuomas who was in shock of Dee storming at him, he looked up at her brother and took a deep sigh. 'this all of this is all my fault.. but I am here to tell her Jyrki is worried sick about her and has been looking for her for over 3 days now going halfway insane he never wanted her to leave.' Tuomas answered William who was looking over to his sister who was now sobbing on Donny's arm. 'Your telling me it's your fault? You came between them?' William looked at Tuomas half outraged but Donny stopped him. 'Will.. it wasn't entirely his fault remember? Dee had some fault in it to.' Donny said to him while putting a hand on his shoulder. Dee then turned around to each and everyone of them looking completely empty. 'it was partially my fault.. I should have never kissed you or loved you for any of that matter when I was already happy with the love of my life.. I used you for my own benefit and for that It means your useless to me now and that I don't need you anymore. Goodbye.' She said to Tuomas and walked right passed him towards the exit. 'what the!! Hold on kid!! Not like this your not going to hurt his feelings any more for something that you did!!' William yelled over to her and she froze. 'Why would you care? It's not your live falling apart.. it's not you who has lost the love of his life now is it?? Will why should you care?' Dee spoke these words to him without turning around looking right out in front of her. No one spoke for a very long time until someone else very unexpected did and directly to Dee. 'Then you don't have to punish him for it.. it was both of you who were wrong but don't punish him for something you took place in as well... besides you haven't lost the love of your life yet.. didn't you hear them he is looking all over for you to return to him he never wanted you to leave.' Tarja said to Dee out of the corner she had been standing next to Dee listening to everything. Dee turned around towards the corner and Tarja walked out of it towards her. 'Excuse me?' Dee choked out looking at Tarja with huge disbelieving eyes. 'You heard me.. I know you hate me for all I've tried to do to you.. that's more than understanding but don't lose both of them by shutting yourself completely out.' Tarja said to her and Dee still looked at her stunned but started thinking that she indeed had a point in this.  Dee stood there for several minutes looking at Tarja thinking. 'Thank you.' She suddenly said to her and turned around to Tuomas and everyone else. 'Your welcome.' Tarja

said to her and walked away again towards the dressing rooms. Dee walked over to Tuomas and wrapped both her arms around him hugging him. ' I am so terribly sorry for saying those things to you I am so sorry!!' she said to him again and again while holding on to him, stunned as he was in the first place he looked down at her and then realised she was apologising to him and wrapped his arms around her holding her tight against him. 'it's alright.. I don't mind I mean you had a lot on your mind... but please contact Jyrki he is losing it for real he loves you.' Tuomas said to her while kissing her hair. 'Jyrki.' Dee breathed out she hadn't said his name in days and felt more tears falling down her cheeks. 'Dare. Listen to him you have to contact Jyrki... I mean if he is losing it he must care a lot about you!' Donny said to her and she stopped crying. 'But.. Don.. I' Dee started and he became angry.' Daremo!! You listen to me and listen to me now you have to contact him!! You owe him that much!! The man went through hell with this!!' Donny said to her angry and she let go of Tuomas. 'Hell?? He was not the only one going through one you know.!! You saw what state I was in Don!! So don't go yelling at me now just don't okay!.' Dee said to him and went back into the room to get her bag. William than said something to her in French and Dee nodded. He then turned towards everyone else and  spoke in English again. 'How long are you here? In Hollywood I mean?' William asked Emppu. 'Until tomorrow afternoon why?.' Marco answered him instead. 'Would you like to come over to our place and have something to drink while we talk about this?' William asked them again. They all looked over at Tuomas and he nodded. 'Daremo do you mind or do you not want us to come over?' he asked her. 'I don't mind. We need to talk about this anyway.. besides I don't own a phone so I have to talk to Jyrki anyway and I need to borough one of your phones for it since I don't have his number.' She answered him and he got his phone out and handed it to her. 'Here use mine.. you don't have to now just use it when your ready for it.' He said to her and she smiled  while they walked back to their dressing rooms to change and freshen up the 3 already walked towards the exit to wait outside for them. Dee then bumped into Tarja again. 'Ohh sorry didn't see you.. excuse me.' Tarja said to her and was about to walk away when Dee stopped her. 'Tarja wait!! I was wondering if you want to come with us over to our place to have something to drink?' Dee asked her and Tarja's mouth dropped not believing what she was hearing. 'Ohh I don't know if you want me there so..' she started and Dee smiled. 'I don't mind besides you're the one who got me thinking straight again so what do you say?' Dee said to her and Tarja smiled a little. 'Uhh okay then if you don't mind.' She answered and Dee nodded in agreement and walked with her outside to wait for the rest of the band. 

Back at Dee's and William's place everyone had sat down and started talking about the whole situation some of them feeling a little bit uncomfortable that Tarja was there as well and that Dee was constantly talking to her about the situation of her Tuomas and Jyrki and about the situation she had before with her and Jyrki. Tuomas looked at it and listen to it for a while and then started getting very annoyed but didn't show it since he didn't want to upset Dee again and just talked with them sometimes if he wasn't talking to William and Donny explaining his side of the story to them. 'So. If I get this right you in love with our sister? But she is in love with Jyrki but loves you to in way?' Donny asked him and Tuomas looked at him weirdly for calling Dee his sister. 'uhh yes that's it but she loves him more then me so I guess we are becoming friends in stead... why do you call her your sister I mean she is your friend right?? Since well she called me he is like Donny to me before towards Jyrki so .. I don't get it now.' Tuomas asked him and both Donny and William burst out in laughter. 'Ohh, well I am her best friend but see her more as my sister then a friend really.' Donny said to him and Tuomas chuckled. 'Ohh now I get it.. well okay then I know her point of view on me now to.. so you 2 never dated?' Tuomas asked him and once again the 2 burst out into laughter. 'Ohh god no! never.. they tried and tried and tried our friends but I can't imagine kissing my best friend or naked in that matter like I said she is like a sister to me!' Donny said once again laughing. 'ohh I see!! Sorry didn't meant to.' Tuomas said to them and they both grinned again saying it was okay and that they were used to these questions. 'ohh Don!! Your lying we did kiss remember??' Dee said again while giggling and Donny turned red. 'Dude not funny that was under the mistletoe with Christmas!! That doesn't count!' Donny answered and they all burst out into laughter. 'yeah but we did kiss so you can't deny that!!! Anyhow.. I think it's time for me to call Jyrki.. since well Tuomas your phone has been buzzing all the time from the messages Jo and Jyrki are sending over to you.' Dee said to him handing him his phone. He looked through it and handed it back to her. Dee took a deep breath and the entire room went silent as she dialled the number and held the phone to her ear. 'Well here it goes then.' Dee said and heard the phone ring a couple of times before someone picked up. 'Tuomas!! Did you find her? Is she okay?!!' Jyrki said on the other end of the line. Dee looked up and around in the room it took her a couple of seconds to repeat to him. 'Jyrki.. it's me.'.                             

Chapter 17  You just don't want it to be true.

He woke up with a start, he was just a day back from tour and already had a charity ball coming up ahead the day after. There were sounds outside his house that were familiar to him when he looked outside his bedroom window he saw his band mates already waiting for him outside in the car. He walked down the stairs towards the front door yelling at them to come in for a minutes since he wasn't ready yet he had just woken up for Christ sake, he left the door open and walked into the kitchen to already get them all something to drink. When he walked back into the living room his friends had already sat themselves down. 'Wow, did you just wake up or something you look like crap!' Emppu said to him and he smiled faintly. 'yeah have been up all night, I just couldn't sleep she just keeps running through my head all the time I just have no idea how to block it out.' Tuomas answered him while looking down at the table where he had put his cup down with the coffee twisting in it now since he was stirring it with a spoon. 'well have you talked to her already I mean she must already know your back right?' Jukka asked him and he nodded no and took a sip of his coffee. He regretted it ever since he went to Dee's birthday party that he even went. He kept having dreams about her ever since she was on his mind 24/7 and he just couldn't stop thinking about her not even during performing, his friends all noticed this after a couple of days and started asking him what bothered him he then just couldn't keep it to himself anymore and told them everything that had happened between him and Dee and that he was falling in love with her. They were all shocked at first since they knew Dee was together with Jyrki, but understood very quickly that this wasn't just a fling happening but that this was serious since they to had seen the looks on Dee's face towards Tuomas and they to remembered all to well how upset she was when she came out of his house when trying to talk reason in to him. 'your kidding right? You know you might walk in to her on the charity event right? You have to call her!' Marco said to him while looking a little worried towards his friend. They all knew how Tuomas was when he was serious about falling in love with someone but they also knew that he would torment himself if that person was already together with another man. 'well I better get ready then, since we had to be there like 10 minutes ago give me a few.. be right back.' He said towards his friends who all looked after him half shaking their heads. 'we need to get this fixed as in fast.' Emppu said to Jukka and Marco who both nodded their heads into a yes.

Back at Jyrki's house he to was getting ready for the charity event since he was the ambassador of Finland for Unicef he had to look his best. Dee sat in the living room reading a book when he was getting ready. She said she wasn't coming along since she didn't like charity events not for the reason but for all the people that would be asking her all sort of things all night, Jyrki was okay with it and was now walking into the living room fixing the last things on his look. Dee was all over the book so she didn't see or hear him pass by into the kitchen, when he got back into the living room and talked to her she glanced up at him. 'Does this look alright or do I have to change anything?' Jyrki asked her showing her his look. Dee looked up and half dropped her book. 'WOW... I mean.. are... what the.. love your wearing a suit!' Dee said while half bursting out into laughter and having her mouth hanging wide open looking at Jyrki, he stood in front of her wearing a satin black suit with a black buttoned shirt under it and a dark blue tie. He stood there looking at her with a smile on his face and his hands in his pockets. 'Ohh yeah now you have done it!' he said to her with a smirk. 'done what? You're the one wearing a suit for gods sake.. I must say It looks good on you a little weird for me but good.. aww love give me a break okay I'm not used to see you dressed like this!' Dee said to him when she saw his smirk growing bigger and bigger. 'nope you laughed at me so your coming... and no buts your not going to win this your coming.' He said to her folding his arms while she got up from the chair she was sitting on. 'Ha!! But I do have a but.. since I have nothing to wear so there I can't come.' She said to him grinning thinking she won the argument. His smirk then turned into a huge grin and he walked into the bedroom, when he came out again he was holding a dark blue cocktail dress that matched his tie. Dee's eyes grew huge and she shook her head. 'you got me a dress?? Even though I said I wasn't coming.. your crazy love.' Dee said walking over to him to get the dress from his hands and walked into the bedroom slamming the door not knowing she needed help with the zipper. 'So your coming? Or are you just locking yourself up in there hoping I will go away?' he said to her while chuckling. He heard a deep sigh from inside the room and some rumbling and then the door opened and Dee stood in the doorway fully dressed with the tight cocktail dress on and the high black heels. 'some help please.. since I can't close the damn zipper on my own.' Dee said to him while turning herself around and lifting up her hair, he closed the zipper with one movement and she let her hair down again now turning around again and walked towards the bathroom to put some make-up on. Minutes later she walked out having her make-up done and her hair hanging loose down her back she grabbed a little black purse and walked towards the door to get her coat , she then turned around with her left hand on her hip looking at Jyrki. 'well we can go now.' She said a little bit irritated and he just chuckled and took her hand  while opening the door and she just rolled her eyes at him. They got into the car and drove over to the charity event, while sitting in the car Dee had a weird feeling that something was going to happen but she couldn't place it she just looked over to Jyrki who was driving the car having his hand on her leg and watched the road. 'is everybody else coming to?' she asked him and he looked over to her to find her stare. 'yes.. as far as I know they are. They are probably there already waiting for us.' Jyrki answered her. Dee still looked at him not completely satisfied with the answer. 'Are Jussi and Jo there to?' Dee asked him once again while looking away from him to the road. 'Jussi is I don't know if Jo is there to.' He answered her once again and she pouted and he chuckled. 'Are you worried you don't know anyone there? Don't worry love half of Finland's artists are there including HIM and Nightwish who you both know.' Jyrki said to her while moving his hand a little over her leg. Dee's eyes shot up when he mentioned Nightwish to her. 'Nightwish? Are you sure? Aren't they touring Europe anymore?' she asked him now looking through her phone if she had missed any calls or messages from Tuomas but she couldn't find any. 'Yes didn't you know that? I thought I mentioned that to you love... yes they are done touring Europe they are going to America in a few days.' He answered her and she still looked at her phone. The following minutes of the drive were silent and both of them stared at the road. After 10 minutes Jyrki pulled up in front of a huge building with a red carpet and loads of photographers and artists on it. They got out of the car and had their car parked. Jyrki offered his arm to her and Dee slipped hers under his and looked around at the crowd. 'Are you seeing those women. They look absolutely gorgeous compared to me I feel so out of place.' Dee said while looking around the red carpet when they entered it she hadn't even noticed the rest of the guys standing with them now since they had to stop for picture's and reporters were asking all sorts of questions towards Jyrki and the others in Finnish. 'Dee don't forget to smile your looking rather stunned now.' Bazie said to her while poking her in the side. 'Ohh holy crap I didn't see you guys I was staring at all these drop dead gorgeous Finnish women.' Dee said towards Bazie and smiled and then noticed all the flashing camera's and reporters. 'Where is Jo?' she asked Jussi and he nodded over to the reporters side, she spotted Jo in between them taking picture's. without thinking she walked over to Jo with Bazie at her side since Jyrki was still answering questions. 'Jo.. why are you not with us?' Dee asked her and some other reporters took pictures of her and Bazie. 'well I have a job to do for my boss you know and besides I will be joining you guys after the red carpet.. Jussi will get me then.. you look nice by the way your matching.' Jo answered Dee and Dee's mouth half dropped. 'ohh great I am being set up here you guys all knew I would come.. well I still feel out of place here.. and my god what will people think of the girl standing on the pictures with the 69 eyes?' Dee said now laughing a little. Jo grinned back and noticed other reporters wanted to ask Dee and Bazie questions. But she beat them to that. 'Guys will you answer some questions for me?' she looked at Dee who got the message immediately and nodded yes and pulled Bazie closer next to her since the Finnish reporters also fired questions at her. 'B.. what the hell are they asking me?' Dee asked him in between answering Jo's questions. 'well they want to know who you are.. and what you mean to the band.. and if your dating Jyrki or anyone else in the band.' Bazie said to her while answering her and some reporters who asked him something. 'Uhm.. okay what is Jyrki telling them?' she asked him again looking over to Jyrki who glanced back over to her smiling. 'Well.. he told them that you indeed are his girlfriend.. but he won't tell them your name.' Bazie answered her and she smiled. 'well thank the gods for that so I can tell those predators out here that we are dating?' Dee said to him while smiling , Bazie grinned and nodded yes. 'Good you translate for me please then.' Dee said and winked at Jo who went over to interview and take pictures of other artists. When Dee and Bazie finally were done answering questions they were on their way heading after Jyrki and the others since they already passed them, Bazie a step ahead of Dee since he walked faster and Dee was particularly slow with the tight dress on and the high heels. Dee kept walking after him and smiling since that is what the reporters wanted, her bracelet which she had gotten from Tuomas then unlocked and slipped of her wrist and she had to walk back for it. When she bend down to get it another hand touched hers and picked it up, Dee got up and thanked whoever picked it up, when she looked up though she froze to the spot. 'Ohh thank you so much it just slipped of I have no idea how it happened.. but thank you any....' Dee babbled and looked up to see who picked it up and lost her own words staring into the light blue eyes of a man she knew very well. 'it's okay I saw you losing it.. and well I don't want you to lose my gift now do I?.' Tuomas smiled his charming smile and Dee remembered how to breathe again. 'uhh no off course not.. uh..' Dee started and he smiled again stepping closer to her and took her left hand holding it out to put the bracelet back around her wrist. 'Thank you.' Dee blushed and stared at the same time still not believing he was standing in front of her, she then heard Jyrki call for her and she turned around and he spotted Tuomas waving at him. 'see you later then.. you better go he is waiting for you.' Tuomas said to her and Dee nodded yes and walked of towards Jyrki who stood there waiting for her. 'I see you saw Tuomas already.. what happened?' he asked her while he wrapped a arm around her waist kissing her cheek, camera's flashed all over the place when he did that and he grinned. 'Ohh uhm.. my bracelet slipped of and he helped me putting it back on again.' Dee answered him half hiding the bracelet since she usually wore it under her long sleeves not wanting for Jyrki to see it or know she got it from Tuomas on her birthday. Unfortunately for her he took her left hand and looked at it. 'is it fixed now? Ohh I haven't seen this one before did you recently get it?' he asked her with a smile when they walked into the building and hanged their coats. Dee looked at him and got nervous, but decided to tell him anyway he would find out eventually if Tuomas ever mentioned it. 'Uhm... I got it on my birthday as a gift.. Tuomas gave it to me.' Dee said quickly looking down to the floor waiting for his reaction. 'Ohh that's very nice.. and it's a charm bracelet right? We must get you some more charms for it since one charm is a bit to empty for the bracelet.' He smiled and guided her into the ballroom.

After dancing for half of the evening since Jyrki loved the fact that he could show of to everyone who his girlfriend was Dee got sick of the pair of eyes burning on her back the entire time. She then started searching around the room and found the pair of eyes who were watching her every move and looked straight at them, she then turned her head again towards Jyrki and smiled. 'Love do you mind if we have a little break since my feet are really starting to hurt now I just have to rest for a few moments.' She looked at him with puppy eyes and he chuckled. 'Off course rakkauteni.. I don't want you to be limping at the end of the evening now.' He answered her and they walked of the dance floor towards the others who were sitting at a table now joined by Jo sitting next to Jussi in a long red dress. Dee could still feel his eyes on her and really started to get irritated by it now, why couldn't he just leave her alone for this evening? That's the question that roared through her mind. She looked up from the table again towards him and saw him making a signal to her to the side doors that led out into the garden next to the building. Dee got up from her chair and took her purse, Jyrki was right next to her in a second. 'Ohh please sit down Jyrki, I see Ville coming over to chat with you guys.. I'm just going for some fresh air and a cigarette I'll be right back okay?' Dee said in her most charming voice while looking him deep into his eyes and stroking his hand which was in hers. 'all right rakkauteni but if you aren't back in 10 minutes I'm coming out to get you.' He said chuckling while giving her a soft kiss on the lips. Dee smiled and walked away from the table towards the side door, she opened it and went through them walking into the garden, since she had no idea were Tuomas was she just kept walking. She then heard a whisper from behind her, she turned around but saw nothing. 'Dee over here..' Tuomas whispered over to her and lit his lighter so that she could see where he was at, Dee walked towards the light and he unlit it the seconds she was near and grabbed her by the arm close to him wrapping both his arms around her. Dee pushed herself away and lose from him and took a step back which startled him and he looked at her stunned. 'What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?' he asked her moving over to her but she took another step back. 'something wrong? Are you fucking kidding me Tuomas?? You left and I didn't hear a thing from you ever since I was worried for gods sake I thought something had happened to you! And now you come back to Finland and don't even take the effort to let me know your back! What the hell do you think is wrong in this?!!' Dee whispered back to him furiously while taking another step away from him. He dropped his hands immediately and slid down the flower wall they where standing next to with his head in his hands. 'I'm sorry I didn't mean to do this to you.. I'm really sorry but what was I suppose to do? Tell you I loved you that would only hurt you more then it does me since I know you will never be mine because you love him more than me!' he said to her and Dee was shocked and almost lost her balance but caught herself in time. He got up again and looked at her and Dee could see in his eyes how much this hurt him knowing she would never be his to have but always Jyrki's, she took another step back and tried to breathe while holding on to the flower wall clutching one hand to her chest. He lifted his arms up again to help her but she stopped him to hold up hers. 'did you... just....tell me... you love me?' Dee said looking at him with pleading eyes feeling her breath slip away more by the seconds that ticked by, she had to lean against the wall now. 'yes.. is that wrong? Am I not allowed to tell my feelings for you? Since they are here and will not go away for a long while maybe never if I look at it this way since the first moment I saw you I already loved you.. but knew that I had to wait or step back and become friends instead.. even if it would kill me.. you will never be mine.' He said to her while stepping closer to her, she didn't step back from him but allowed him to come closer to her. She looked at him with terrifying eyes of confusion, he could see in her eyes the desperation for advise on what to do now since she was lost now. 'I am not asking you to choose, I would never ask that from you since it is a impossible task for you.. I just want you to know that I to love you more than anything else I have ever loved in my life..' he said to her taking another step towards her so that he was just one step away from her. 'this can never be... you know I will never leave him.. I love him more than my own life.. you know this Tuomas.. but you also know that.. that.. i..i..' Dee started stuttering the words since she knew what was coming would give him false hope, she would never leave Jyrki he was the love of her life but at the same time so was Tuomas, she just didn't want to choose and she was happy with Jyrki she couldn't have been happier in her life, but when she looked at Tuomas she felt the same love and happiness with him only by looking at him. She didn't know what to do anymore. She looked at Tuomas since he was right in front of her now almost touching his lips with hers. She took a deep breath and breathed out the words to him in a whisper. 'I love you to.' She whispered to him and felt his lips touch hers. She didn't stop him in any way and they kissed for several minutes until he released her since he could feel her tears falling down on to his hand under her jaw line. She was trembling from head to toe and opened her eyes to look at his while he took a step back from her. 'I'm sorry.. I didn't mean to.' He whispered to her and she stopped him by pressing her finger to his lips and pulled him again closer to her to kiss him again wrapping both her arms around his neck, she then released him and spoke to him again. 'it already happened we can't deny it now.. but you have to now.. I am staying with Jyrki.' She answered him and he nodded. She started fixing her make-up and wiped away the tears from her eyes and quickly lit a cigarette. 'come.. it has to look like we have been smoking out here since Jyrki will be looking for me in a few minutes.' She said to him taking his hand and led him over to the bench that was standing in the clearing to the garden since they had been standing to the side where no one could see them. They were sitting for nearly 2 minutes when Dee saw Jyrki coming through the doors and looked around for her. 'Rakkauteni??' he called out and Dee had to swallow before answering him not to make him suspicious. 'Jyrki.. I'm over here!!' she answered him with a steady voice and quickly let go of Tuomas' hand. Jyrki turned around and spotted the 2 of them on the bench and walked over to them. 'Ah here you are.. sorry couldn't see you that good love it's a little dark out. Ohh hei Tuomas!' Jyrki said to him while they got up and the guys shook hands, they then sat down again with Dee on Jyrki's lap wrapping her arm tight around him. 'ohh are you cold?' Jyrki asked her since Dee was still trembling. 'Ohh just a little.. shall we go back inside?' she asked him while she got of his lap and put out the cigarette. Jyrki agreed with her and walked back inside with Tuomas behind them who signalled over to the rest of Nightwish to follow him back towards the in the meantime , 69 eyes and HIM tables.

The event had come to a end and they al returned home or at least that is what Dee thought they would instead they all ended up in a bar again after partying. Dee sat with Ville and Gas of HIM with Jo asking them a lot of stuff about their music. 'So when does your tour start again? I mean you must be going on tour right? Okay now your making me nervous stop staring at me!' Dee said to Ville and he laughed while having his arm hanging over the arm of Jo's seat. 'Yes we are going on tour again.. and sorry but it's hard to keep my eyes of you 2 very lovely and beautiful ladies.' Ville said back to Dee and made both Jo and Dee blush. 'Jo what is it with these fins.. they can all stare at you in a way that makes you go weak on the knees.' Dee said already seeing Jo half melt next to Ville. 'I have no idea.. they just do.' Jo answered after a while still staring at Ville and giggle when he winked and they continued their conversation until Jussi came walking towards them and pulled Jo after him towards the sofa's to wrap both his arms around her while kissing her. 'Hmm well excuse me gentlemen there is a drink at that bar with my name on it, it was nice talking to you and I hope to view one of your shows soon enough.' Dee said to both Ville and Gas while getting up walking towards the bar. 'Charming ladies now aren't they... lucky bastards.' Ville said to Jyrki when he joined them and they had some jager meisters together. Dee reached the bar and sat herself down at the nearest seat she could find and ordered her drink. She threw back the vodka shots she ordered fast and then turned around to look into the bar she saw Jyrki, Emppu and Marco sitting together at a table with HIM and Tuomas , Jukka , Timo , Bazie and Archzie together at a table next to the sofa Jo and Jussi were sitting on. She then realised everyone was having fun and that she was sitting at the bar alone getting drunk. 'great!' she said to herself sarcastic and took her JD/coke with her towards Jo and Jussi. 'Okay you 2 move over I have to tell you something.' Dee said to them half drunk. Jo and Jussi moved over for her while laughing a little. 'Okay Jojo.. this is serious and you have to help me.. I must say I already know my decision but I have to get it out of my system anyway.' Dee started towards Jo and Jussi since he was sitting next to her. 'Okay.. just tell me whatever you want and I'll try to give you some advise.' Jo said leaning closer to Dee since the music got a little louder. 'Okay.. thank you.. well.. how to begin.. I'll keep it short.. you know I love Jyrki more than anything in the world and I will never leave him right? You both know that.. well.. here it comes.. I have kissed Tuomas a few hours ago and told him I loved him and he told me the same.. now Jojo what advise can you give me to that?' Dee said to Jo. Jo and Jussi both had their mouths hanging wide open having no idea what to say to her.