slash Blog and Journals

Ronnie's POV

  I was completely done with relationships.  For good.  From now on, I was only gonna go along with it all, never get too serious with anyone.

  Well.  That's a lot easier said than done.  It was pretty much what I'd told Soph...and for some reason, for once she actually believed me.  Weird...

  Anyway, the whole relationship thing was pretty much how I found myself standing on Max's doorstep on thursday afternoon, already drunk even though it was only, like, three.  

  A few seconds after I rang the doorbell, Max opened the door.  He was wearing only jeans and his hair was a complete mess for some reason.

 "What's up?"  he asked as I walked in and stood, awkwardly, in the hallway.

 "We need to talk,"  I said shortly, breathlessly (I'd pretty much run all the way).  Max glanced at me curiously.

 "Okay, shoot."  I shook my head.

 "Not here.  Can we go in your room?"  he shrugged and I headed over to the stairs.  "Can you get us something to drink?"

  Upstairs, in Max's room, I lay down on the bed and glanced around.  I knew this room pretty much off by heart, me and Max had hung out here so often.  The posters of bands - Guns 'N' Roses, Marilyn Manson, Blondie; the cluttered, messy desk with what looked like Max's most recent homework chucked carelessly under it; the black bass guitar on its stand behind the door and another, this one lime green and safely enclosed in its case, propped against the bulging closet door.  I suddenly caught sight of something pink and lacy half hidden behind the case.  What the fuck?  I sat up in complete astonishment.  This was going too far, even for Max.  And then it occured to me that Nicola had been here.  Max and Nic...most likely...

  The bedroom door suddenly flew open and Max practically threw himself inside the room, landing on the bed and tossing me a can of budweiser.  I stared at it for a moment; I'd already had too much to drink, that and knowing Nicola's bra was behind Max's bass case was making me feel faintly sick.  All the same, I'd come here for a reason.

 "Max, we need to talk,"  I mumbled.  He giggled slightly...God how I loved Max's girly giggle.

 "You said - downstairs, remember?"  he leaned forward slight  ly, scrunching up his nose.  "Have you - I mean, were you drinking before you came here?  You smell of alcohol."

 "Maybe,"  I shrugged.  "What were you doing before I got here, shagging Nic?  You smell of sex..."

 "How can someone smell of sex?"  Max smirked.  "Besides, so what if I was?  She's my girlfriend, remember?  Like Sophie's yours."

 "Not anymore she's not,"  I retorted.  "We broke up this morning.  Which is half the reason I went and got pissed with Monte."  Max was staring at me in complete shock.

 "You two broke up?  But you were like...this close!  How come?  Who did it?  I want details, Ron-Ron."  I gave him a weird look.

 "Where the hell did you get 'Ron-Ron' from?  You're so incredibly gay sometimes, Max."  If only you actually were...I gave myself a mental shake and carried on.  "Kay, so I broke up with her and she was really upset, and I felt really bad about it so I called Monte and, well, you know..."

 "Why though?  I thought you two planned to get engaged and get outta this shit hole asap!  Did you cheat on her?"  he pressed.  I muttered something vague about thinking I was in love with someone else and raised the can to my lips, finishing it in about five swallows.  It was a pretty stupid thing to do cause it just made me feel even more ill, but at least it meant I couldn't see Max's expression for a few seconds.

 "Really?  Haha, oh man - who?"

 "I can't tell you...you wouldn't understand."  I lay back on the bed and shut my eyes, wishing he could read my mind...maybe he'd even...feel the same?  No, no way...this was Max, my best friend!  Shit, man, you don't fucking fall for your best friend.  Especially your best friend of the same sex.

 "I should go,"  I said quietly, making no move to get up.  Max bit his lip, pulling his lip ring into his mouth slightly, looking like he wanted to say something.  I smirked, wondering what he was thinking.  "...Seriously, my dad's gonna be mad at me for being drunk anyway-"

 "What would you do if there was someone you really, really liked, and you wanted to tell them so fucking bad...but you couldn't cause you were scared what them and other people would say?"  Max cut in suddenly.  I stared at him, narrowing my eyes, thinking...I liked Max.  At least I thought I did... there was pretty much no denying that anymore.  I'd just broken up with my girlfriend so I could tell him how I really feel.....except now I can't, cause now he likes SOMEONE FUCKING ELSE.  I put my hands over my face and said, between gritted teeth,

 "I don't fucking know.  I mean...Shit, dude, why not just tell them and if they take it the wrong way then at least you'll know.  Stop fucking quizzing me, Maxy, I'm not up to it right now."

 "Sorry,"  he whispered back.  I sneaked a glance at him through my fingers.  Fuck...he looked like he wanted to cry or something...

  Why do I always have to fuck everything up?

O.o Jez detects a sex scene on the horizon ;)  lets hope Krystal takes it too XD