Your Own Disaster (Chapter 31, Part 1)

Soooooorryyyyyyy!! I meant to update this past weekend, but I just couldn't seem to make myself write :/ 

This hasn't really been edited, so it's a bit random at times... I just wanted to get something up, lol.

Part 2 should be up by this weekend... :)

“You invited Kelly?” Hayley asked, furrowing her eyebrows. Ethan’s birthday party was in full swing now that all the guests had arrived. Or so Hayley thought… until Josh mentioned he had asked Miss Kelly from Ethan’s daycare to come.

“Yeah, was I not supposed to?” Josh replied. “I mean, she takes care of the little monster every day, why not invite her? And it’s not like she came anyway.” 

“No reason I guess.” Hayley shrugged. 

“Plus, she laughs at my jokes.” Josh grinned. Hayley stopped what she was doing and looked at Josh curiously. “Oh!” Josh gasped. “Oh no! Hayley, don’t! I don’t like her. There is no need to be jealous.” 

Hayley laughed and shook her head. “I’m not jealous.” She explained. “Just trying to figure out why she would laugh at your lame jokes.” She teased. Josh stuck his tongue out in response and helped smooth out a paper tablecloth. “Besides, Kelly’s married and loves her husband very much.”

“Oh…” Josh said.   

“And, her husband is 10 times hotter than you are…” Hayley added jokingly. Josh gasped and put his hands on his hips for show. 

“Guess I’ll have to pick Ethan up shirtless next time and see what she thinks.” He shrugged. Hayley rolled her eyes and dragged Josh outside where the kids were playing.

“Josh! Hey!” Taylor called. “Over here.”

“See you later.” Josh said to Hayley. He kissed her cheek and jogged off toward Zac, Taylor and Jeremy. 

“Beer?” Jeremy asked, holding out a bottle. Josh took it and took a rather large gulp thankfully. He had dealt with a stressed out Hayley all morning and he was ready to relax a bit. 

“Drinking at a three-year-old’s birthday party? Really?” Emily asked as she walked past. Zac pulled her toward him and put an arm around her protectively. 

“We’re not getting drunk.” Jeremy pointed out. “What else is there for us guys to do at this party?” 

“I’m only teasing.” Emily laughed. “Alright, well, I’ll leave you to it. I was just passing by on my way to the bathroom. Being pregnant is oh so much fun…” She said sarcastically. 

“It’ll be worth it in the end.” Zac smiled. He kissed his wife before she headed into the house.

“There’s an accident waiting to happen.” Taylor frowned. He nodded toward a tree with rather large roots in the backyard. Ethan was running around it, chasing his friend Catherine. 

Sure enough, the toddler tripped over the tree’s roots and fell, hitting the tree pretty hard on his way down. Josh’s heart stopped as he watched, he knew Ethan would be ok, it was only a minor fall, but panic set in anyway. 

After a few seconds of shock, and trying to figure out what had happened, Ethan’s cries filled the air. Josh was already halfway to him when the cries reached everyone’s ears. 

“Ethan! Hey, you’re ok!” Josh soothed, scooping his son up into his arms. He inspected Ethan carefully before pulling him close in a hug. “You’re ok.” The toddler had a small scrape on his cheek, and a shallow cut on his elbow but other than that, he looked fine. 

“I want my mommyyyy!” Ethan wailed. 

“It’s ok, Daddy’s here. I’ve got you.” Josh whispered. 

“M-momm-myyyy!” Ethan cried. 

“Mommy’s coming.” Josh assured. Ethan blubbered into Josh’s chest while Josh rubbed his back and soothed him the best he could. 

“Look at you!” Josh smiled, pulling Ethan away to inspect the scrape and cut once more. “You’re a tough guy now.” Ethan cocked his head to the side and looked at Josh curiously. 

“H-huh?” Ethan asked. 

“You’re a tough guy! You have a scrape.” Josh replied. Ethan wiped his eyes and smiled faintly. 

“Tough guy.” He repeated quietly. 

“Very tough.” Josh informed as Hayley finally came over with antibacterial wipes and bandages. Josh shooed Hayley away and cleaned Ethan’s scrape up on his own. He was determined to be a hands-on dad. 

“There, all better.” He smiled when he was satisfied with his cleaning job. He kissed Ethan’s forehead and patted his back lightly. Ethan ran to Hayley for a hug and she wiped the remaining tears from his eyes. 

“Why don’t you go show your friends how tough you are!” Josh said encouragingly. Ethan smiled, puffed out his chest a bit, and ran off happily.

“Thanks.” Hayley sighed. She rested her head on his chest lightly and he wrapped his arms around her. 

“No problem.” Josh smiled. 

“You’re like, superdad.” She smiled. Josh shook his head and laughed.  “Seriously!” She continued. “You were already there before he even knew what had happened.” Josh shrugged, and smiled to himself. 

“We should get back to the party.” He suggested. Hayley nodded and kissed him softly. 

“Sorry about that.” Josh apologized when he got back to the guys. 

“No problem.” Jeremy smiled. “Duty calls.” 

“Dude… he looks so much like you did when you were a kid.” Zac said quietly as the guys watched Ethan and his friends play. Josh smiled proudly and nodded. 

“You know what amazes me?” Taylor said after a few moments of comfortable silence. “You went from ‘everyday guy’ to ‘Dad’ so quickly.” He said, looking at Josh. “And you did it so naturally and so well! I mean… for just jumping in like you did. That’s hard, dude. You’re doing a good job.” He finished with a smile. 

“He’s doing a great job.” Jeremy corrected. “Being a Dad is hard.” 

Josh forced a smile and nodded. Recently, it had really been bothering him that he had just… jumped in, as Taylor had said. He regretted not being there for Hayley and Ethan from the moment his son was born every single day. 

He hated that he’d missed out on so many firsts in Ethan’s life. He hated that he’d missed out on the pregnancy. He hated that he wasn’t there when Ethan was born. He didn’t even know what time his son was born, or his length and weight! All things a Dad should know.

He hated that he still didn’t know absolutely everything about his son that Hayley knew. What he liked, what he didn’t like, the stories he told, his previous encounters with friends… He hadn’t been there for those cute and funny stories that Hayley enjoyed telling so much about when Ethan had been a baby. 

He certainly learned a little more each day, and he was eternally grateful that he was able to be there and experience life with Ethan now, but that didn’t change the fact that he and Hayley had both been too stubborn for him to be there in the past. He wished, more than anything, that he could go back in time and make things right. 

“Hey, Josh…” Zac said quietly. “You’re here now. Things are working out pretty good. Don’t ruin it by wanting to change the past.” Zac always seemed to know what his brother was thinking. Josh both hated and loved him for it. 

As much as he still wanted to take things back, he knew Zac was right. There was no way of knowing what would have happened if he had stayed with Hayley that night she had told him she was pregnant. Maybe they wouldn’t have lasted as a couple at all. Maybe he would be in a worse position than he was in today if he and Hayley had stayed together. All things considered, he was in a pretty good place. Leading a very happy life. 

But he just couldn’t seem to silence that regret…

“Time for cake!” Hayley’s mother called from inside the house. 

“Oh boy… here we go!” Jeremy groaned. “Everyone take an Advil? It’s about to get loud.” 

~*~

An hour later, Josh swore to himself that he would never let three year olds eat cake again. They were an insane bunch of people when sugar was running through their little veins…

“You know, I’m really proud of you, Josh.” Zac smiled as he watched his brother smooth-talk two children into sharing a toy without either one throwing a tantrum. “You’ve got this father thing down.” 

“Ha!” Josh replied sarcastically. “Yeah right.” 

“I can’t wait to be a Dad…” Zac sighed with a smile. 

“Won’t be long now!” Josh replied distractedly. “Ethan Joshua!” He yelled suddenly. Ethan looked up and grinned mischievously. He was standing in front of the kitchen wall, frosting-covered hand outstretched toward the nice clean cream-colored wall. 

“Ethan!” Hayley warned, as she spotted her son as well. “If you don’t stop right now, everyone will have to go home.” 

Her bribe came too late, as Ethan’s hand made contact with the wall, leaving a small blue handprint behind to match a few squiggles he’d already made before Josh had noticed. Josh sighed and grabbed some kitchen towel to clean up the mess while Hayley pulled Ethan away from the wall and scolded him. 

“Josh, will you go get the you-know-what?” Hayley mumbled quietly. “I think it’s time to wrap things up.”

“Are you sure we want to give it to him after he’s just colored the walls?” Josh asked. 

“People are looking like they’re ready to leave and the kids will be coming off their sugar-highs pretty soon. Better get it done before the good-byes.” Hayley explained. Josh shrugged and walked toward the front door. 

“Ethan, why don’t we go outside for a bit?” Hayley suggested after she’d given Josh five minutes to prepare. 

“No.” Ethan replied. He was too preoccupied with his new toy racetrack to want to move. 

“Daddy wants to show you something cool.” Hayley bribed. Ethan looked up and shrugged. 

“Yes.” He decided. “Less go. Hold me!” Hayley laughed and picked Ethan up while she and the other parents shepherded the children back outside. 

“Whoa!” One of the other kids gasped as he walked out the door. Ethan furrowed his eyebrows and wiggled his way down to the floor so he could run outside. 

There, in the middle of the driveway, was Josh with a video camera and a shiny new red tricycle. Ethan’s eyes went wide and he looked up to Hayley, trying to figure out whose cool bike was sitting next to Daddy. 

“That’s for you, EJ.” Hayley smiled. “Go see it!”  Ethan shrieked and ran toward the bike happily. He squatted down next to it, to inspect and touched it lightly with his fingers, as if was afraid it would crumble if he put too much pressure on it.

“What do you think, buddy?” Josh asked. He handed the camera to Hayley and set Ethan on the bike seat. 

“For me?” Ethan asked in astonishment. Hayley giggled from behind the camera and Josh nodded. 

“It’s all yours.” He smiled. 

“Whoa!” Ethan gasped. He put his feet on the ground and began pushing himself forward. 

“Eth, you have to put your feet on the pedals.” Josh explained with a laugh. He stopped the toddler and helped him get his feet in the right place. “Now, push your legs.” He guided. Ethan giggled in excitement as the bike began to move without his feet on the ground. Josh walked alongside Ethan as he rode slowly down the driveway, helping him avoid cars as he went. 

“No Dada!” Ethan said, slapping Josh’s hand as he helped his son turn the handlebars. “I do.” He added. After a few tries, he seemed to get the hand of minor turns and before long, he was speeding along the driveway. 

“Josh!” Hayley gasped as Ethan sped straight toward Josh’s parked car. “He doesn’t know how to stop!” 

“Shit.” Josh muttered under his breath. He ran after the toddler and grabbed hold of the back of the bike just before Ethan slammed into the car. 

“Nice save!” Jeremy called from the grass. Josh took a mini-bow, keeping one hand firmly on the bike in case Ethan decided to pedal forward once more. 

Ethan craned his head over his shoulder to look at Josh. “Help Dada.” He said. Josh laughed and turned the bike, and Ethan, around. He gently grabbed Ethan’s legs and pushed them backwards, showing him how to use the brakes. 

“Jeez, he’s a fast learner…” Sarah noted. 

“He’s always been quick to catch on.” Hayley added. Josh forced a smile and scratched the back of his neck. 

There was another thing he didn’t know. He could easily see that Ethan was a very smart kid, but he hadn’t been there to see what things Ethan had caught on to so quickly. Was it walking? Talking? He had no idea.

“Now, Ethan, you can only use this in the driveway, ok?” Hayley instructed. “Don’t go in the street. Do you understand me?” She asked. 

“Uh huh!” Ethan called. He was already halfway down the driveway before Hayley even finished talking. The toddler stopped short in front of Catherine, whom he had seemed to develop quite the crush on, and grinned. 

“Well, he figured out the brakes.” Sarah laughed. 

“Gotta stop for the ladies.” Zac joked. 

“Look what I got Cafwin!” Ethan bragged to the little girl. Catherine grinned in admiration and examined the new toy.

“Ah, young love…” Taylor smiled. 

“Don’t you dare!” Hayley warned. “He is too young!” 

“Don’t worry babe, girls will catch cooties pretty soon.” Josh explained. Hayley rolled her eyes and rested her head on Josh’s shoulder. 

“Do I have cooties?” She asked with a smirk.

“Mmhmm.” Josh replied. “Lucky for you, Ethan’s immune and I’m too addicted to care.” He added. 

“Oh, really?” Hayley laughed. Josh grinned broadly, causing Hayley to roll her eyes and hug him. 

“You really did a great job with this party, by the way.” Josh noted as he looked around. The kids were running around the front yard happily, or admiring Ethan’s new bike. There hadn’t been one tantrum from any of the children, and, besides Ethan’s mishap, there had been no crying or injuries.

“I think it went well. Thanks for the help.” She replied. “Glad its only once a year though.” She was completely exhausted. 

Josh chuckled and nodded in agreement. “I’ll go grab the goodie-bags for the other kids and see if we can’t wrap this party up. Then we can relax.” 

“Sounds amazing.” Hayley sighed tiredly. “Thank you, Josh.” 

Seriously though... I just sat here and stared at the computer screen for about 3 minutes going O.O before I even thought to try 'paste' hahaha. Go me!

For anyone who was wondering, the Paramore show in Boston was SO FREAKING AWESOME! I got about seven rows back from the barrier. Wish I could've been closer! The Swellers were amaaaaaazing, they're playing at a supersmall venue in Boston next month, but I can't go because of school :'( Paper Route's set was so freaking good, I can't wait to see them play again someday. And Paramore... just incredible. I can't even explain how awesome they were, haha. It was so much fun! :)

Edit: Buzznet is throwing a shitfit about the formatting this time around. Sorry if there are weird breaks between paragraphs in the chapter or if there are no breaks between paragraphs at all. I'm woring on fixing it, haha.