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Bad Netflix: 'Underdog' review
I could be cute and say this is one Underdog you won't be rooting for, but that would be cheesy.
A little background. I saw this movie because I did the equivalent of loosing a bet. I put up a poll for what movie to watch and review and Mark took it upon himself to hurt me. Anyway, two of my friends came over for suicide watch while I put in the movie. Did I mention beer? There was a lot of beer involved.
It starts off with clips from the cartoon and the first of about 5 different versions of the theme song. My thought was why tempt us with the cartoon when I already know you'll only deliver a far inferior product. But then I thought I might really try to write a review.
Very early on we hear what the dogs are thinking/talking a la Look Who's Talking. This is actually a poor production move as it becomes muddled later when the dog is speaking Dog or English. My hopes for a passable good time fell. The movie dragged on. And then...
Patrick Warburton. I've been suspecting it for a while, but this movie cements it. Patrick Warburton is made of approximately 87 percent pure awesome. Warburton and Peter Dinklage (also awesome) emerge quickly as the overly cartoony villains. The thing is, in the Underdog world, they're the only ones that fit. Underdog is self conscious. The citizens are too accepting. The villains are the only characters that make sense. Anyway, Warburton literally throws himself into the movie (set) and sets off some more awesome (explosions for absolutely no reason). Oh, and the dog gets powers. As for sense, it doesn't look like anyone in production cared about this thing. I think the sets were recycled from the lab in Honey I Blew Up the Kid.
The dog is adopted by Belushi, champion of the blue collar. The dog starts talking. Imagine that commercial where the dog say, “You haven't been the same since you started using pot. I miss my friend” but with less heart. That's the movie so far. The dog love interest has a mirror counterpart and it's about then that I realized all the humans (sans villains) are really unnecessary to the story. I mean, the family doesn't do much except have a 'movie of the week moment' later on. The Molly/Polly love interest is really written for one character. And Jack Unger (Alex Neuberger) not only doesn't do much other than carry around the costume but he has a strange accent. I called it as Fargo mixed with High School Musical. Yah.
Ah, and then the villains come back! They seek out an underground lair, as all cartoon enemies need. Warburton announces the place “smells kinda like a men's room” and Dr. Barsinister spits back “So much the better!” Genius! Underdog doesn't have a costume. He ends up flying through a windsock that looks like a fish and tries to stop a bank robbery. This is pretty much the thesis moment of the movie. Underdog is embarrassed about how he looks. The cops and hostages all look on without saying a word. And Warburton simply looks at the costumed dog and says, “Dogfish...”. Brilliant. Afterwards the dog realizes that he needs a costume. There's a montage and I came to the conclusion that, super powers or not, putting animals in clothing is dumb.
There's a little more action. Then there's a very poorly written scene. Barsinister is holding Belushi hostage with 3 regular dogs. Underdog shows up with his kid owner and Barsinister announces that he has them all trapped. There is no trap, but Underdog still lets them tie up his owner and then take away his powers. Because... well, let's not dwell on the lack of reasoning there. The villain makes super dogs. They form a union and leave. Barsinister takes the power pills himself and grabs a sword, thereby becoming awesomer than Yoda.
The film ends with Underdog saving the day by burying 3 sticks of dynamite in, judging from the size of the explosion, an underground oil reserve. However, there's a part where he is thrown into space and drifts past an astronaut before falling into the earth's atmosphere and crashing down. Since they say that he has the strength of a buffalo, the flight of an eagle and other various animal abilities, my friend asked what animal was cloned to let him survive the rigors of near absolute zero and the lack of pressure in space. I put down my beer, looked him in the eye and said, “The indomitable American spirit.”
Part of a 3 part post. Underdog Review Netflix Crap Vote: What to watch drunk next?
A little background. I saw this movie because I did the equivalent of loosing a bet. I put up a poll for what movie to watch and review and Mark took it upon himself to hurt me. Anyway, two of my friends came over for suicide watch while I put in the movie. Did I mention beer? There was a lot of beer involved.
It starts off with clips from the cartoon and the first of about 5 different versions of the theme song. My thought was why tempt us with the cartoon when I already know you'll only deliver a far inferior product. But then I thought I might really try to write a review.
Very early on we hear what the dogs are thinking/talking a la Look Who's Talking. This is actually a poor production move as it becomes muddled later when the dog is speaking Dog or English. My hopes for a passable good time fell. The movie dragged on. And then...
Patrick Warburton. I've been suspecting it for a while, but this movie cements it. Patrick Warburton is made of approximately 87 percent pure awesome. Warburton and Peter Dinklage (also awesome) emerge quickly as the overly cartoony villains. The thing is, in the Underdog world, they're the only ones that fit. Underdog is self conscious. The citizens are too accepting. The villains are the only characters that make sense. Anyway, Warburton literally throws himself into the movie (set) and sets off some more awesome (explosions for absolutely no reason). Oh, and the dog gets powers. As for sense, it doesn't look like anyone in production cared about this thing. I think the sets were recycled from the lab in Honey I Blew Up the Kid.
The dog is adopted by Belushi, champion of the blue collar. The dog starts talking. Imagine that commercial where the dog say, “You haven't been the same since you started using pot. I miss my friend” but with less heart. That's the movie so far. The dog love interest has a mirror counterpart and it's about then that I realized all the humans (sans villains) are really unnecessary to the story. I mean, the family doesn't do much except have a 'movie of the week moment' later on. The Molly/Polly love interest is really written for one character. And Jack Unger (Alex Neuberger) not only doesn't do much other than carry around the costume but he has a strange accent. I called it as Fargo mixed with High School Musical. Yah.
Ah, and then the villains come back! They seek out an underground lair, as all cartoon enemies need. Warburton announces the place “smells kinda like a men's room” and Dr. Barsinister spits back “So much the better!” Genius! Underdog doesn't have a costume. He ends up flying through a windsock that looks like a fish and tries to stop a bank robbery. This is pretty much the thesis moment of the movie. Underdog is embarrassed about how he looks. The cops and hostages all look on without saying a word. And Warburton simply looks at the costumed dog and says, “Dogfish...”. Brilliant. Afterwards the dog realizes that he needs a costume. There's a montage and I came to the conclusion that, super powers or not, putting animals in clothing is dumb.
There's a little more action. Then there's a very poorly written scene. Barsinister is holding Belushi hostage with 3 regular dogs. Underdog shows up with his kid owner and Barsinister announces that he has them all trapped. There is no trap, but Underdog still lets them tie up his owner and then take away his powers. Because... well, let's not dwell on the lack of reasoning there. The villain makes super dogs. They form a union and leave. Barsinister takes the power pills himself and grabs a sword, thereby becoming awesomer than Yoda.
The film ends with Underdog saving the day by burying 3 sticks of dynamite in, judging from the size of the explosion, an underground oil reserve. However, there's a part where he is thrown into space and drifts past an astronaut before falling into the earth's atmosphere and crashing down. Since they say that he has the strength of a buffalo, the flight of an eagle and other various animal abilities, my friend asked what animal was cloned to let him survive the rigors of near absolute zero and the lack of pressure in space. I put down my beer, looked him in the eye and said, “The indomitable American spirit.”
Part of a 3 part post. Underdog Review Netflix Crap Vote: What to watch drunk next?
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| Posted by bulletproofheeb on 01/15/2008 4:30 PM | Visits: 214 |
Im so glad you saw this, not me. Well written review :)
great review, sucky movie.