backstreetboys Blog and Journals

As all of you know school started on Monday. And A-days are my favoite because its really chill.

1st period: Creative Writing
2nd period: Guitar 1
3rd period: Geometry
4th period: Newspaper

Anyway, I walked into school and it was all dark (all the other students were there as well) except the emergency lights. I walk to my 1st period and asked my teacher, "I guess they wanted to keep the school cooler." she laughed and said that while working on something in the east parking lot and they blew a transformer so it knocked all the power out in the school except the phones and enter come. The portables and seminary had power though. (1st is in a portable). One of the girls in class walked down to the office to "see" what's going on and when she came back all the administrative were yelling at each other "trying" to figure out what to do. Mr. Smith's voice came over the enter come and said that we will have first and second periods and then go home. After first the whole school held its breath until 10:30 and it turns out the power stayed off!

I tagged along with Taige, Becca, Jay, Jordan and this other girl and we decided to go to Jordan's house and "tried" to figure out what to do. They wanted to got Laser tagging. We went on a whiled goose chase for a while until Allie (my cousin) called me and told me to get my ass home now. I told Taige (while still on the phone) and I said I have to go home because of my mom, Allie told me that its not about her. (My mom has MS and its really bad so I worry a lot about her while I'm out). Taige hurries and drive me home and I jump out of the car and run inside. Allie walks up to me and Says, "I'll give you a guess as to who died." "Grandma?" "No." "Grandpa?" she nods and told me her mom and mine where in the back if I wanted to see them. "Let me just go tell my friend what's going on." I said walking out. I got up to Taige's car, "Well?" he asked. "My Grandpa died." He got out of his car and walked around, "Are you going to be okay?" "I-I don't know." (Mind you Jay was in the car). "Well, I hope everything is going to be." He said hugging me. This is the first time Taige has ever hugged me without me asking! He says bye and I walk back into my house.

I walk to the TV room and I see Sandy (my aunt) and my mom crying a little. We hug and bawl. Allie goes and gets her brother, when he comes back Sandy tells him and he just runs out the door to cry. We walk downstairs and while Tyler is crying in the corner I just sit on the couch with my mom. Allie and Tyler go and get coffee and Sandy made me put in a dark humor movie, "Arsenic and Old Lace" (if you wanted to know). We all watch it pausing for the occasional talk/phone call. But Allie and Tyler were flipping through an old baby name book and they kept running up and down the stairs to look up names on my computer. Tyler wanted to go to a movie, we were waiting for my brother's school to get out and for him to get home.

They just left, and will come back in a while, my mom has seated herself in front of her TV. I in front of my computer and Matt (little brother) still hasn't come home. I still have to read "Uncle Tom's Cabin" and write a two page DS (Double Spaced) essay on why History is my favorite subject (courtesy of my teacher). You see. Only two periods and what great periods they were, going on a car wild goose chase, hearing that my last grandpa is dead isn't what every girl wants to do in a day. We (my family) all knew this day was coming but when it actually comes we don't like it. And we even said that we wouldn't cry for the son-of-a-bitch but we did! And we really miss him. Hell, the best thing we looked forward to is Christmas because he would wear a stupid, old Santa hat and give us money. I've gone forever with 20 bucks and was hoping for 50 this year. Now, its not going to happen. Its not going to feel right! When we turn 18 we get 100. And when you get married 200. (I'm getting selfish aren't I?)

I'm going to miss him a lot. But we said that he is with his mom and he's looking down at us and is feeling guilty for not listening to us. I know he is doing that because we have time and time again told him to quit smoking and to get a hearing aid and eat better. But no, he fell down pulling people with him. As they got up, he thought, "I don't need to help myself anymore, these people will do everything for me now." (Huh, now this day is getting even more ironic. While typing the last sentence on my itunes Backstreet boys song: "So Me the Meaning of Being Lonely" (Perfect song for the moment, isn't it?) So I just skipped it and Avenged Sevenfold's song: "Seize the Day". Okay, this is getting a little long so; Dear Diary will be up in a day or two, and The Bottom of This Bottle will be up Saturday (I'm going to type it Friday).