Age is a factor when dating no matter where you live. So what happens when you fall for someone over the age of 18 when you are just a minor? Is it worth the risk? George from Valencia gives his two cents. Check out this Rock N Roll Therapy.



Katieb129: For about 2 years I have had only 1 good friend. I'm pretty quiet and reserved and the "good" girl and she is loud, has no shame and generally does the kinds of things my parents would kill me for. She told me she quit smoking but she smokes like half a pack a day. She has had about 5 boyfriends in 3 months and the last one I'd never met nor heard of but found out he was in rehab for drugs. She's cheated on her boyfriends, had sex with I think 2 different guys and comes to school with huge hickeys and bite marks on her neck. She makes me feel uncomfortable when we're out because she insists on announcing to her friends that im still a virgin. Shes started hanging out with stoners and has stopped telling me basically anything so all of this information has been found out by small things shes said to me, from people shes told, or overhearing conversations with her new "friends". We're seniors in high school but she doesnt do her school work and I'm afraid shes not going to graduate. She's screwing up her life and I dont know what to do to stop her.

George: At first, I was just going to say that people can be themselves as much as they want and as long as that doesn't have an effect on your friendship and in the end you still see that person as a confident, or vice versa, it's ok as long as you guys are cool. Things like trying to embarrass you in front of other people and basically pushing herself away from you because of all this isn't very cool at all. The best thing you can do is tell her you're worried about her, and that it's upsetting that you guys have grown apart because she's acting this way. You should at least give that a shot, because at least you know you put yourself out there and tried to work something out. You shouldn't ever just give up on someone that you're really worried about, it's not fair to them or to yourself.




Rockerxmonkeyx: Ok, I'm 15 and all the guys I like and that I know like me back, are 18, and I don't want them to get into any trouble if we actually have something a little on the sexual side happen. I know we should keep it in our pants, but if it does happen...and an adult finds out about it, I don't want that person to be charged with stat. rape. I mean, some of them are going into the military right after school, or are already in such. What am I supposed to do? I do have one other person I like, but he started dating a gal about a month ago, so he's off limits now as well! HELP PLEASE!!!!!

George: It sounds like you already know the answer to your question, if you think there will be a problem, then stick with that gut feeling. It's only really worth it if you and whoever you're with have genuine feelings for each other. Otherwise, it might be your best bet to stay out of trouble.  There's plenty of time to worry about getting sexual as you get older. 




Hushhushdontletthemknow: I have this friend that I have known for a while now. When I first met him and got to know him I had a crush on him. Telling him I liked him was hard and I was afraid on what would happen with our friendship. When I told him, he was a good sport and he was completely understanding. The crush has subsided substantially. Since then we talk but not as much as I like. He has even said himself that I don't talk to him much. Part of that is my fault, but it also takes him forever to get back and when we have a good conversation flow it just ends. I totally understand that his only means of contact with people is his sidekick. I would like to tell him flat out but again I am afraid for the friendship. Thats all that matters to me is being his friend. I also feel that at times he is not totally honest with me. I tell him a lot but not the other way around. Should I just suck it up and tell him flat out how I am feeling? I know its the correct thing to do and thats how you build relationships with people. Its always easier said then done. I need a guys perspective.

George: Really, the best thing to do would be to talk to your parents or someone at your school to figure out what to do.  Webmd isn't really the most credible way to diagnose something like bipolar disorder, so you need to talk to someone and let them know you're really worried about it and ask how you can get it checked out by a professional.  Also, you'd be surprised at how insurance companies work, trust me, I'm in a band and it's not the most reliable or healthy lifestyle, but I'm covered. If you're worried about what people think, the truth is, if they judge you for who you are, then they aren't really your friends anyway. Worrying about side effects of medication is a common thing, but you have to weigh your options here and decide what you think is best for yourself and you should talk to someone about cutting. That's a really big deal. You shouldn't hurt yourself as a way to try and feel better.  Your body is you, and you deserve the best, so that means you should treat it the best you can.  The truth is, I'm just some guy in a band. Your parents or a guidance counselor will help you make the right decision, so go talk to them. Hope I was a little helpful.

Have a personal issue? Would you like to get some advice from a musician? Post your situation in the Rock N Roll Therapy Group.