Take all your jabs and taunts, you're pointing out my every fault; and you wonder why I walked away? When you tell me I'm a wreck, you say that I'm a mess; how could you expect anything less? Tell Me I'm A Wreck; Every Avenue
When we got to the next Warped Tour venue, I was busy helping sell merch when I saw Alex come over and wave at me before he got interrupted by some fan. He was smiling at her, and was talking to her, nodding his head, listening. I looked over at John who was talking to a few girls, laughing and smiling, giving autographs, and being funny all the while holding up, probably the most awkward conversation ever. I grinned. I had a date tonight with John.
"Hey gorgeous; can I have a shirt?"
I looked back and I smiled, "What would your band think?"
Alex smiled at me and wrapped his arms around my waist, "I missed you."
I giggled smiling, but frowned immediately, feeling the sick feeling burst into flames in my stomach. I'm an awful person.
The day I saw John kissing that girl, who happened to be his girlfriend of two years that he was gone; I went out, bought new, skimpier clothes, and caked my face with more make-up than I should have had. I wanted to make him jealous, I wanted to make him see what he lost. So a few days after that whole incident, I came to school on Friday, looking at John and his group of friends that happened to have Pat gawking at me, walking towards me; I walked over to his younger brother, looked at John, than looked at Ross and kissed him. Ross shocked at first, but he put his hands all over my body kissing me deeper until I pulled away; I smiled sweetly at everyone who was staring and walked away. I looked back and saw Pat talking to John, and John annoyed hit his brother in the head.
"What's wrong with her?"
I blinked a few times before I rubbed my eyes getting out of this memory and saw Alex, Garrett, Pat and John standing there looking at me worried.
"We've been trying to get your attention for ten minutes." Alex pouted
"I-I'm sorry." and got down off the table, "I think I need to be alone."
Ross and I had been going out for two months - and it seemed like he was already pushing boundaries. We walked to his house holding hands and laid on the couch together watching some movie when we started to kiss, heavily. His fingers lightly unbuttoned my blouse, one-bye-one, trailing kisses down my chest, as he ran his fingers on my belly, making me gasp at how cold his fingers were - it made my skin blaze, and I felt even more hot now.
Than the basement door opened and I quickly pushed him off of me, looking up at the blonde girl - who was dating John wearing one of his big band shirts and his boxer shorts, her face flustered and she giggled when John came and tickled her sides and picked her up, pushing her against the wall lightly and kissed her.
"Let's go to my room, Sophie." Ross said pulling on my hand, I ran my fingers into his shirt before catching a glimpse of John looking at me while we were walking up the stairs and his hands fall from the wall and he sighed. When we got to Ross's room, I grabbed onto my stomach and sat onto Ross's bed.
"Are you okay?" He asked, and knelt down in front of me before I flickered my gaze over at the picture of him and John, than over at the picture of me and him. Before I nodded I placed a gentle kiss on his lips.
"Yeah. I'm okay."
He smirked, playing with my pant loops, "So.. should we get back to where we got interrupted at?"
I nodded before I moved back, and he laid me down on his bed, we started making out again, and he finally unbuttoned my shirt and took it off, brushng his fingers across my chest, I pulled away from him, and pulled off his shirt, his hands going up when I threw it on the ground, I kissed his chest, and he took off my bra, laying kisses on my jawline.
"Are you sure?" He asked looking at me when we both were fully naked, and our bodies hot. Out of breathe, I nodded.
"Gosh.." I mumbled, watching the sun go down and turn the sky pink, I heard the distant sounds of music playing. I ran my fingers through my hair. Who was this person I became?
Laying there in the same bed as Ross, he was playing his Call of Duty game only wearing a pair of boxers; I got off the bed and pulled on one of his shirts before going behind him and wrapping my arms around his shoulders, I kissed his neck.
"I love you, Sophie." He said quietly and I watched his player get blown up on the screen. He looked at me finally, and I smiled slightly before kissing him on the lips.
I was jealous, that's why. John was always two steps ahead of me and I always had to be on top their with him. Sighing I sat on the grass.
I looked up and saw a sweaty, breathless John O'Callaghan smiling up at me. I smiled and watch him trip over a rock, and went to get up before he fell right on me. Laughing, he pulled himself up, but still sat on me lightly; looking at me.
I looked at him, and saw his eyes were light, and he was smiling. He was happy.
"Are you okay?" I laughed and held my breath when his fingers brushed the hair out of my eyes.
He nodded, "A little embarrased, but always okay."
"You have to be, don't you?" I asked, "I mean, it's bad enough that you can't even have a sad day because everyone knows you're just not that good at hiding it, and they'll worry-"
"I'm good at hiding it."
"Are you sad now?"
"I'm not. And you shouldn't be either, you're too pretty to be sad."
I smile formed on my lips, "Cheesy, but thanks."
"I'm a cheesy goofball!" He announced and helped me up, "Let's go get some twinkies and play arcade games."
When we were stuffed from eating boxes of twinkies, even though I had no idea where he got them from, we played with his Gameboy - color - that was blue and played Pac-man.
"Hey John, can I ask you something?"
"Sure." He said and looked at me, resting his forearms on his knees.
The wind blew through my hair and John smiled which made me smile and feel the blush crawl onto my cheeks.
He rolled his eyes, "This girl who is on-again-off-again, John O'Callaghan's girlfriend. But we're off. She thinks I'll cheat on her with some groupie. I guess you heard part of the conversation that day we were in the hotel?"
I nodded slowly, "I'm sorry - I'm sorry for making it feel like you have to babysit me, it was never my intention."
"I know, baby girl." He said, "I didn't mean to hurt you either."
"I know." I said softly.
Grinning when I felt his arms go around my shoulders we got up and raced back to The Maine's bus; John was holding onto my hand as we ran, but we stopped when we heard yelling coming from our bus.
"Where the fuck is he?!"
"He's gone out!" I heard Pat yell back
"Shit." John mumbled and opened the bus door we walked in their, our hands still intertwined, we watched a blonde-headed girl turn around and gawk at John. I quickly let go of his hand, and took a few steps back before she started following me.
"He was with you!" She yelled at me.
"What do you mean by that?" I asked and stopped walking backwards crossing my arms.
"Uh, you're a whore, hunny."
"Oh, aren't you blunt. Bitch, you don't even know-"
"You cheated on me, Sophie.. With, Bryan." Alex walked from the backroom and looked at me, "Tell me if that's true or not."
"Alex, I can explain."
I looked at the blonde-girl again, noticing her features, everything about her. The girl John was kissing when I was crushing on him, the girl I saw wearing his shirt and boxers, the girl that was now standing in front of me, calling me a whore.
"Ana-Beth?" I said.
Ana-Beth, my best friend - or used to be bestfriend before she found better people to hang out with in high-school, she had got a nose-job and a boob-job, she can call me a whore, but atleast I'm not as fake as a barbie.
"John O'Callaghan's girlfriend, to be exact."
I winced and felt my heart being cut open and looked at John, "You said she was off-again."
"Oh, please, don't tell me you were smoozing with her?"
"What's wrong with me?" I asked
She laughed sarcastically at me, and threw her hands in the air, "You're a whore! W-H-O-R-E! You slept around with the seniors when you were a junior, than slept around with the seniors when you were a senior, and also giving juniors blow-jobs?"
"I haven't slept around that much." I said, "A few guys here and there.."
"You're a whore!"
"Stop." I said quietly, feeling my heart being slashed open.
"Go home, Ana." I heard John speak up. "I'll see you there in a few more weeks, maybe."
"Just go." He said
"Is it true?" I heard Alex ask me and I looked at him, tears filling my eyes about to spill out. I couldn't talk, and I grabbed his hand leading him in the back-room and shutting it. "So..?"
"I only did it because he asked-"
"Oh! So that makes it so much better!"
"We weren't even going out!" I said feeling tears hit my cheeks, "I-"
"I said I loved you!" He yelled
"I was scared! I'm scared! I-I can-"
He threw his hands in the air, "Whatever, Sophie."
"Alex, please!" I said grabbing onto his arm, and winced when he shoved me and opened the door, leaving me standing there alone; and crying.
I sat on the floor and curled up into a ball.
I didn't deserve anyone, I didn't deserve love; and I knew that, I was pathetic and it was all my fault. Pat came in and was about to say something.
"Don't say anything!" I yelled at him sobbing harder, "Leave me alone!"
"Sophie.." He said quietly, but after awhile he left.
Here's an update for you, beautiful people. HAPPY FREAKING NEW YEARS!
I love you guys so much, eh! ;)
Any perdictions? :D