What Christina Perri’s New Music Video “Human” Means To Me
“I can turn it on
Be a good machine
I can hold the weight of worlds
If that’s what you need
Be your everything”
It is in perfect timing that my good friend Christina Perri came out with her music video to her single “Human” today. This song was my savior when I was going through a lot of emotional changes a couple months ago.
I always put certain songs as a soundtrack to my life, then years later when I hear it, it takes me back to that specific time and memories flood back. I noticed the other day driving around in the car doing errands, I put on a playlist I made a couple years ago when I had just gotten into a relationship. I remembered the joy and limitless feeling I had! I felt as if I could do anything, like I won some sort of race and these songs related to me perfectly. Listening to them yesterday I was taking such a different meaning from them, along with the overwhelming nostalgia, I was hearing and relating to the words differently? For example, the song “When I was your man” by Bruno Mars was just a sweet song I used to hear now and then and think it was pretty. Now when I hear it, it speaks to me haha, and I can actually relate to it now, where as before I was in dreamland and couldn’t.
“I can take so much
‘Till I’ve had enough
Cause I’m only human
And I bleed when I fall down
I’m only human
And I crash and I break down
your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart”
These lyrics the past month have spoken to me in numerous ways. It’s as simple as Christina states it, I am only human. I am going to have a breaking point where enough is enough. I have to be able to lookout for myself, and heart knowing when to say stop. I am going to make mistakes and fall back into something that is easy, comfortable or that I know. But when it breaks me down again I can’t get mad at myself, I’m human. I am going to naturally do whatever I can to make myself happy in that moment, and if it bites me in the ass or stabs me in the back I can’t lay there crying dwelling over it. I have to cut myself a break, it is okay to cry, bleed, yearn and fight. As long as you get back up, know no one is perfect and keep on fighting.
When that time comes, when you know something isn’t good for you, be stong, you can do it. Whether it’s a friendship, relationship, way of living, habit etc. There are going to be those tough days where you want to give in or up. Know that, if you do, it’s okay. We all do things we regret, but if we never did those things, how would we learn?
“your words in my head, knives in my heart
You build me up and then I fall apart”
All I do is replay things in my head over and over again, of what something once was, a memory, a smell, a song, a place. Positive or negative it hurts, it hurts that someone or something is gone, that moment is gone and ripped away from you. When that someone or something slips through your fingers that you can’t control, it hurts. A person made a great comparison the other day to me about losing someone, it is like being in the middle of a computer back up with your hard drive by putting everything you own onto it, then somehow it just disconnecting and all of a sudden you lose everything. Everything that you have invested was in that hard drive, pictures, music, memories, documents, files, folders, videos. All these things that are now… gone..How do we come back from this? I am trying to figure it out right now in many different ways. But I know that I am human for feeling this way and thankful my heart has the capacity to hurt, be happy and possess these emotions that some people are incapable of feeling.
Don’t ever apologize for crying, feeling, missing or remembering.
You are human.
Thank you Christina for writing this beautiful gem, being a beautiful person and making this beautiful music video.
Watch her music video and then share with me what it means to you.