Demon Spawns That Top Renesmee Cullen

A few summers ago I sought comfort on the ground as I curled into the fetal position trying to recover from what may be the most brutal birthing scene ever written in the English language. *BREAKING DAWN SPOILERS* In the final chapter of the Twilight Saga, Bella gives birth to a half human half vampire demon child who tries to suck the life out of her from within. The only way for her to make it out alive is for handsome Edward to GNAW the baby out of her stomach. Stop. Barf. Recover. Okay.

When the beautiful baby Renesmee (the name is an entirely separate can of worms) comes out she is a wonderfully beautiful Siri Cruise like tot worthy of love and affection. WTF? Right? Any baby needing to be bitten out of the womb should be born a demon spawn like the ones I will chronicle below: