Yeah, you’re a Hero, Bro.

The only person I like less than Brody Jenner is Spencer Pratt. Oh and this guy I dated who had a black&white headshot of himself doing “puppy eyes” in a Goonies shirt, but thats beside the point.

From People:

In a dialogue exchange that is part of a profile of Jenner in the March issue of Details, Spencer Pratt, described as Jenner’s “manager- slash- publicist-slash- agent-slash-stylist” says to Jenner, “Here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna start dating Nicole Richie. And you’re gonna get that skinny bitch to eat, all right? You are about to become The Guy Who Got Nicole Richie to Eat. Process that shit, bro. You’ll be, like, a fucking hero to America.”

The plan, which was devised last August (just when Jenner and Richie did begin dating), was actually part of Jenner’s scheme to ride Richie’s coattails and become a more familiar name himself – which, as Details points out, proved successful, because here it is interviewing him.

A week after Jenner and Richie split in October, Jenner forged a relationship with The Hills costar Lauren Conrad. (That ended quickly, too.)

“Basically,” says Jenner, 23, “I made it, like, my mission to try to go on a date with every girl on The Hills.”

What winners. Seriously. Publicizing your insincerity and complete lack of respect for other human beings. I kind of wish he was on the 134 freeway when Nicole Richie was driving the wrong way.

Picture from Mollygood.